How to Die Before You Die (Egoic Death)

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1 Detection of the Egoic entity

2 Core of Ego

3 Ego wants to survive

4 Mind and suffering are synonymous

5 Experience what the Sages meant

6 Let the Stillness shine through

7 Challenges will still come

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Reviewed by Jennifer McVey, Cht

Last Updated: September 24, 2024 References

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Many sages and spiritual masters have said that dying before you die is the Egoic death, death of the personal self, death of all desires, fears and attachments.. Seeing from a traditional perspective, it may seem overwhelming and frightening because that’s what basically life is all about for most people. However, see if you can realize the true meaning behind these words holistically and experientially. That is realization of the nature of the world, mind and what lies beyond. It’s for those who have some spiritual depth in them. Otherwise it will be meaningless.

Steps

Method 1

Method 1 of 7:

Detection of the Egoic entity

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1. 1
   Detect the voice in the head and emotions that live in you. In order to die, spiritually speaking, first you need to detect that there’s a compulsive voice in your head and emotions that accompany it. If you’re reading this, you probably already have. Realize that this impersonal Voice speaks and acts through you, commentate, non-verbally and verbally reacts, resists, likes or dislikes, generates pointless and negative thinking and so on. Recognition of this “voice” and the accompanied emotions is the beginning of egoic death.
2. 2
   Experiment by not following the voice or egoic mind. See it as an experiment and notice the peace within and quality of your actions and words, when you 'don’t follow' or negate the mind as compared to when you do. However, 'don’t follow' or negate it in a non-reactive, accepting and non-judgmental way, so awareness is required. Or else, mind will likely “try” to ‘not follow’ the “voice” in a reactive and resistive way and make concepts about 'how not to follow it'. That is to say, one part of mind will try to 'not follow' the other part of the mind. Which means, the same voice will come through the back door. In this context, mind also implies non-verbal reactions, background unease, mental-emotional resistance or blockages or walls (more on this later), impulses, negative emotions, conditioned urges etc.

   • The more you become aware of your compulsive and conditioned thoughts and emotions and not follow or believe them, they begin to become less noisy, lose energy and slow down. It’s because your unconscious identification or following them is what gives them energy. As this implied disidentification becomes a natural practice, you will realize how negating the egoic mind or entity and its concepts makes way for true intelligence and brings about a transmutation of the accumulation of past and blockages in you, into unshakeable aliveness, peace and joy.
   • This is also mentioned in Tao Te Ching in a cryptic way, “Throw away holiness and wisdom (mental concepts, in this context) and people will be a hundred times happier. Throw away morality and justice and people will do the right thing”.
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3. 3
   Negate or disidentify with the non-verbal mental-emotional resistance and blockages. Negating or disidentifying with the ‘voice in head’ also implies negating the non-verbal mental-emotional resistance, energy, pain and blockages, which are its aspects. Look within now; can you feel a wall of resistance or dense accumulation of time (past and future) in the brain, heart, face, forehead, chest, behind left cheek, jaw etc.? Can you feel or become aware of the unconscious automatic resistance or unease “trying” to dissolve the wall? That’s egoic energy that wants to survive and not feel the pain. Deeply realize that it can’t dissolve it by fighting or resistance and in fact fighting or resisting is the pain or suffering. The root of this fighting is a spiritual one. Consciousness that you are, wants to be free of dense psychological self or time in psyche.

   • Yield to it. Accept that it’s there. Realize that it is not you but an impersonal condition that most humans have. Feel the inner space of head and body. The inner-space is the outlet for the blocked energy that wants to flow up freely . The more you feel it and negate the mind, the weaker the wall or egoic layer becomes. In other words, chakras will open more, if you want to see it that way.
   • Negating the mind also includes negating the unease you feel anywhere in the body. For example: If you are self conscious about your body, then notice the feeling of self-consciousness, wherever it arises in the body. That's ego generated. Negate the feeling and/or realize that it’s not you.
   • Even feeling or state of sleepiness and fatigue, unless you are genuinely tired and sleepy, is not you because boredom, which is mind created, could induce sleepiness and tiredness. Here’s an experiment: When you are feeling sleepy and/or tired, do or watch something interesting and see if you still feel the same.
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Method 2

Method 2 of 7:

Core of Ego

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1. 1
   See where the 'voice in the head' or mind activity is coming from. More you go deeper into the practice of negating the mind and becoming present, awareness deepens, and it eventually exposes the core location of the involuntary and compulsive activity of voice in head i.e behind the left side of face, jaw, forehead and chest(heart area). Also, notice the difference between the energy behind the left and right side of your face, chest and head. That’s the energy of Egoic mind. It’s almost like an entity fitted in the left side of your brain, behind left cheek, jaw and forehead, backed up by the accumulation of dense past and impersonal Egoic structures of your mind and pain-body. Ready to make concepts, react negatively, seeking conflict, absorb consciousness or attention to generate pointless and often negative egoic thoughts and emotions, hypnotize you to do and say things with its unsolicited subtle or not so subtle activity, constantly trying to be in control, personalizing events and people, and pretending to be you.

   • Again, don’t make it into an enemy or obstacle. Instead become friendly and/or accepting towards the inflamed entities (Egoic mind and pain-body). Make it a practice to smile and even laugh, when you see the voice in the head or unhappy self. If you are into visualization practices then imagine a funny and “never content” character, “little me” or something like that, living in the left side of your head and chest, displaying its tantrums, being needy, chattering constantly, labeling, liking and disliking, complaining, narrating, negatively commenting about everything and so on. This may also help you smile when you see the same impersonal voice or character operating in other people. Which is why it is said that primary reality is within.
   • Yes the influx of presence may make it easier to become friendly towards it and recognize its ultimate insignificance to an extent, but the degree of presence may not be the same all the time so moment to moment negation and disidentification from mind are required.

Method 3

Method 3 of 7:

Ego wants to survive

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1. 1
   Observe within that Egoic entity wants to survive. Since the mind wants to ensure its survival, it will relentlessly do all it can to make you follow it. It may use tactics like being pretty subtle, waiting for you to become unaware, generating thoughts in milliseconds to change your behavior without you knowing it, triggering an emotional response and/or pain-body to absorb more attention and add weight to the reaction to make you identify with it etc., so alertness is required. In case you become frustrated, angry, too serious etc. allow them to be or negate those mental-emotional states. Following or believing these egoic reactions and thoughts are only going to feed it. However, even following them can become part of your spiritual path because it will intensify the pain and may eventually force you to realize that Egoic actions and words ultimately lead to suffering.

   • Like Tao Te Ching said “If you want to shrink something, you must first allow it to expand. If you want to get rid of something, you must first allow it to flourish.”
   • The more you practice being aware and negating the mind i.e not follow and believe it, awareness deepens and the peace and joy that come along with it, intensify. Eventually you will be able to detect the unconscious and hypnotizing thoughts, reactions and emotions(influx of egoic energy) coming from behind the left side of the face and chest that have been running your life without knowing it.
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Method 4

Method 4 of 7:

Mind and suffering are synonymous

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1. 1
   Deeply realize that the more identified with the mind you are, the more you suffer and dull you become. Since the mind in its disconnected state is dysfunctional, as most of its activities are around self-serving involuntary negative thinking, maintain or deepen the illusion of separation, feeling afraid, self-conscious, seeking conflict and drama, judgements etc. because it sees itself as an isolated fragment. So the more you believe that the mind is you, more you suffer and dull you become. It’s because you’re identified with the unhappy and limited self.
2. 2
   Step out or retreat from your mind. This means shifting the attention, which is trapped in Egoic thinking, emotions and reactions to the inner space or chakras. You are guiding the attention up to the back or top of the head or wherever it feels natural and easy like chest, abdomen, pelvis, hips, legs etc. As a precise practice, you simply latch onto any openings or cracks through the egoic shell, letting the dimension of stillness to shine through. It may be easier for some people to feel the inner-space of the body and/or head, if becoming aware of awareness is not easy, as distance from the source of awareness to the back of the head is shorter. Of course, feel the entire body at the same time, if you can. Then notice how thought activity naturally lessens. This practice will become more natural when you truly realize how painful it is when attention is trapped in Egoic mind activity.

   • You let the “life” take over and watch how beautifully it runs your life and unfolds synchronous events without any effort, while you watch this as a witness. In a way that’s also what retreat means because you are retreating from your noisy and unhappy Egoic mind. You may have to make this retreat or shift again and again and again until the life at the wheel or surrendered state becomes the predominant or natural state.
   • The act of retreating will become easier and natural as you realize deeply how much pain and suffering you go through when ego is at the wheel i.e when mind absorbs all attention, and how smoothly things flow and lightness, peace and bliss you feel within when you let life take over.
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   3
   Keep the Egoic mind or entity drained of attention. The moment you are not alert, the mind takes over. In other words, it will absorb attention to generate mostly pointless and negative thoughts, emotions, resistance(including blockages), trying to dissolve the pain etc. To prevent that spiritual teachers and zen masters often have a fierce and gentle look on their face. What’s happening is that they are keeping the egoic mind drained by replacing incessant chatter and non-verbal activity of the mind with chanting and/or continuously focusing and keeping their attention on the 'third eye' (and/or other chakras, if you'd like to see it that way) and inner-body, to stay in touch with the source of awareness. This also implies staying present or negating the mind.

   • “The whole essence of zen is walking along the razor’s edge of now that no problems, no suffering, nothing that who you are in essence can survive in you.” Eckhart Tolle.
   • Experiment to see what happens when you chant and/or keep your attention on the third eye and/or inner body and/or breath. Notice if mental-emotional activity naturally lessens or not.
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Method 5

Method 5 of 7:

Experience what the Sages meant

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1. 1
   See what the sages truly meant. When you consciously negate the mind, desires and fears lessen naturally, and you realize what the sages meant when they said “death is the ending of desires and fears”. Since it’s the mind which has desires and fears and not You, so negating the mind is also the death of desires and fears. Along with this shift comes the peace and joy of being conscious. Indian sages called it sachidananda; joy of truth. Infinitely more meaningful than any achievement, happiness or pleasure this world has to offer. The world around you becomes alive and vibrant because ultimately everything is alive and came through one consciousness.

   • “Synchronous and favorable events happen more frequently. Things and people you thought you needed for your happiness now come to you without any effort on your part and you are free to enjoy them while they last” - Eckhart Tolle.
2. 2
   Realize that negation of egoic mind is true success. When you go deeper into the practice of not following the mind, then the mental reaction won’t completely take over you, especially when some big challenge arises. There would be a sense of disidentification with it, even if it is slight. This means you will not be completely taken over by the mental-emotional reaction, which is always an unintelligent way of dealing with a situation and challenge because it’s always based on time. Part of your attention remains in its unidentified or formless state. That’s the state of true intelligence or no-mind, where lies your true power. The more you disidentify with the mind, less and less your actions and words will come from the will-power and reaction, which are aspects of mind. Something much more intelligent takes over; the Life itself.

   • Tao Te Ching pointed to the same truth, “Less and less you try to force things until finally you arrive at non-action. When nothing is done and nothing is left undone.”
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Method 6

Method 6 of 7:

Let the Stillness shine through

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1. 1
   Let the dimension of stillness shine through. Negating or disidentifying from the egoic voice naturally makes way for the dimension of spacious stillness to shine through. The vibrantly alive and healing invisible light shining through the core of your being. Infinitely more loving, fulfilling, meaningful and peaceful than anything this world has to offer. You realize the insignificance and ultimate dissatisfaction of chasing after transient things, experiences and pleasures of the world. As Michael Singer said “You are on a tiny speck of dust in the infinite space”. At the same time you honor and enjoy them, while they last.

   • Since everyone has their own journey, came into this world with different karma and is identified with the mind and world (ultimately world is in your mind) at different levels, so everyone may not realize this truth at the same pace in their spiritual journey. Some people may need more suffering, while some people won’t as they may embrace the shift from thinking to consciousness, voluntarily. Some people may need a mix of challenges and realization to stay on spiritual path, while some may need vast upheavals. Since the Universe is infinitely intelligent, it sends tailored situations, people, conditions and challenges to help you become more conscious.
   • “Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.” Eckhart Tolle.
   • Although it’s possible that the dimension of stillness may get obscured again and again by the mind because of its momentum and deep-seated grip on humanity for thousands of years. And you may identify with the clever egoic patterns, thoughts, concepts and reactions arising from the left side of your head and chest that may say “This pain has no end”, “The mind is relentless”, "Ego’s going to take me over", “It’s so hard to stay present”, “I am not these thoughts.”, “Feeling is not deep enough.” etc. In other words, you are making the Now into an enemy or obstacle, or "trying" to negate it and feel the stillness. However, deeply realize that these thoughts imply that you are identified with tricky and clever mind and are trying to solve the problems of mind at the level of limited mind by following it, which will eventually lead to suffering. As only in the Now, which is outside of psychological time, can you access the deathless dimension, which is going to liberate you from pain and bring transcendence.
2. 2
   Trace the river back to its source. Scan your body from head to toes to look for openings of dimension of stillness, wherever it feels natural. For example: Feel the inner energy field of hands. Feel the life in them. Go deeper into the feeling and feel it becoming more spacious. You are tracing the life energy back to its source; ocean of pure stillness. As you go into it, notice that mind automatically becomes less noisy and distant. It’s because attention naturally withdraws from its identification with dense egoic structures in your head and body and becomes aware of its source; the infinite emptiness. Body and head become lighter and alive. That’s the deathless state and the more you live in that state, you realize that there is no death, just conditioned concepts, past, desires, fears, stories, Egoic structures and physical body die.

   • The “Never content” mind or “little me” may try to pull you back into reaction and resistance mode. It may say something like “It’s not deep enough”, “this is not familiar”, "Give me something interesting to think", “Do something interesting”, “You are going to lose everything”, “There’s still so much resistance.”, “Resist to dissolve this pain” etc. Smile at the entity (which includes the mental-emotional field of unease or pain in head and chest) and politely refuse to follow it "Sorry Madam/Sir, you are not me" and deeply realize it by immediately feeling the inner-space and/or any chakra, otherwise it will become another concept. Notice how such a simple practice almost immediately lessens the momentum of egoic entity, however dense it seems.
   • As you go deeper into the dimension of stillness, you become one with it and anything which is not you, dissolves.
   • Like Tao Te Ching said “Stay at the center of the circle and let everything fall into place”.
3. 3
   Go deeper into the deathless dimension. As the vibrantly alive peace and joy of spacious stillness deepens in you, the pull towards the external pleasures and experiences (which is mind created), biological and sexual urges etc. becomes weaker. You naturally and consciously evolve and develop more faith in the power of spaciousness awareness. You feel the same alive and vibrant stillness emanating from other people, beings and things all around; which is what love is. Thoughts become less noisy and gap between thoughts becomes longer. Mind may occasionally generate negative thoughts and emotions, but the more you practice being alert and not following and believing the mind in a non-reactive and friendly way, it loses energy and transforms into presence. This is the process of egoic death and the end of suffering.
4. 4
   Access the source of awareness. Since the dense accumulation of time or Egoic mind is also around the 'third eye', the source of awareness. Notice that this accumulation of time makes it difficult to access the source of awareness, or it seems to, because you unconsciously resist it, which makes it real.

   • When the grace of presence comes intensely it may dissolve the accumulation of time in brain, thus giving you a glimpse of enlightened state. J Krishnamurty pointed to the same truth when he said “We learn that truth comes uninvited, "with glory," when one puts all in order, and "in that there is great sacredness.”.
   • But again, presence may not be intense all the time, so moment to moment spiritual work is needed. So you need to practice monitoring your inner state or any other present moment practice that resonates with you. The more you “try” to monitor your mental-emotional state, access the source of awareness and trace the opening to the formless dimension, you will notice that brain and/or face and/or heart muscles become tense, as if trying to suppress or control or clear the mental, resistance patterns and external events or feel the awareness. This is a clear sign that your nonreactive and friendly negating and monitoring has become a mental concept and ego has seeped through. So be very alert. As mentioned before, notice the mental-emotional-physical reactions, however subtle or intense, arising in your face, head and/or chest or anywhere. Which is why it is said that being present is a subtle art.
   • Here's the miracle: When you truly realize that the dense accumulation of psychological time(resistance) and emotional pain in you are not You and retreat from them, they dissolve almost instantaneously. In a way, you let them take care of themselves because you deeply realize there’s nothing can be done about them. You may not realize it until one of the Chakras or vortex of energy has open in you. If this article has resonated, even a little, it already has.
   • "When you recognize illusion as illusion, it dissolves" Eckhart Tolle.
5. 5
   Guide the energy flow upward. Feel within that energy or shakti within wants to flow upward from all the vortexes of energy or chakras to the vortex in the top of the head or crown chakra. But because of the automatic and unconscious resistance it gets blocked and you feel pain. You may "try" to clear the path for the energy to flow fluidly. That trying actually blocks it even more because trying is a mental thing. You may even feel the blockage in your head and chest, as there is a physical component to it. For example: tenseness in brain and chest.

   • As a more precise pointer, find the least resistive path to guide the energy upward. This is why it was hinted to simply feel the energy in the top of your head or inner-space and trace it to its source. Again, it’s a subtle art.
   • This simple practice has deeper implications because when you simply and sincerely feel the inner space or energy of the body, you are allowing this moment to be as it is. You don’t want anything from this moment and mind stops automatically because it never wants the Now or what is. You also realize that the joy and peace of inner space are infinitely more than any happiness the realm of world can offer.
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Method 7

Method 7 of 7:

Challenges will still come

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1. 1
   Know that challenges will still come. Conscious or not, you will still come across challenges but in "conscious" state you won’t react but respond to them from a very deep place within. Challenges are also a good way to test your degree of presence and spiritual depth. As how you respond to challenges is a reflection of how deeply rooted you are in the deathless dimension at that time.

   • As you are going into your spiritual journey, actions and/or words are likely to come from a mix (for lack of a better word) of reaction and consciousness. For example: In the beginning, you may respond 98 percent from ego and 2 percent from consciousness or awareness. But as you practice negating the mind and go farther into the spiritual journey, peace within deepens, you develop more faith and realize the practical benefits of responding from presence or consciousness.
   • Ego and pain-body may occasionally take over completely, because of thousands of years of momentum, and generate resistance and pain to "dissolve" the pain, undesirable situation and condition, but they can never because they are delusional. So moment to moment practice of negating the mind is required. This will also help you stay present when a big challenge arises.

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Tips

• Egoic mind is sneaky so it’s possible that it may not come because it knows that you are alert and may look for another opportunity when you are less conscious. For example: When you are doing a chore, engaged in a relationship etc. So alertness is required.
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• The voice in head or Egoic mind will be listened to, but not followed or believed.
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• Compulsive thinking is an indicator that you’re unconsciously still looking at yourself in the world and trying to dissolve the pain at the level of mind. But deeply realize and see that sooner or later you suffer in that state.
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