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Backhanded compliments are designed to make you doubt your skills and abilities. Although these comments seem to have the best intentions, they’re laced with a passive-aggressive tone (often because the complimenter is jealous or envious of you). But how can you tell if something’s a backhanded compliment? We’ve provided plenty of examples of backhanded compliments in this article to help you understand the nature of these comments. Plus, we’ll walk you through how you can respond to them.
Things You Should Know
- Backhanded compliments are insults disguised as genuine compliments.
- “You look pretty in this lighting” is an example of a backhanded compliment. This "compliment" insinuates the person isn't pretty in other types of lighting.
- The best way to respond to a backhanded compliment is to ignore it. If you don’t react, you don’t give the complimenter the satisfaction of hurting you.
Steps
Expert Q&A
Tips
References
- ↑ https://ponly.com/backhanded-compliments/
- ↑ https://www.hbs.edu/ris/Publication%20Files/18-082_f96a8202-ccfe-409b-a8ba-0f187bf678e4.pdf
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/stephaniesarkis/2019/06/25/gaslightersnarcissists-masters-of-the-compliment-insult-or-complisult/?sh=f24759b7b280
- ↑ https://ponly.com/backhanded-compliments/
- ↑ https://www.hbs.edu/ris/Publication%20Files/18-082_f96a8202-ccfe-409b-a8ba-0f187bf678e4.pdf
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/07/youve-been-called-out-for-a-microaggression-what-do-you-do
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/07/youve-been-called-out-for-a-microaggression-what-do-you-do
- ↑ https://www.kenan-flagler.unc.edu/news/when-compliments-dont-work/