Basic Etiquette
Always say “please” when asking someone for help.
It is often considered impolite to ask a direct question about
someone’s salary, wealth, weight or age.
Spitting in public is considered rude.
If there is a line for something, always queue and wait for your turn.
Do not wave or yell to call over a waiter or person of service.
Instead, keep an eye out for them until they make eye contact, and
then nod or raise your hand. You may also gently say “excuse me”
as they pass by.
It is considered rude to ask overly personal, difficult or
uncomfortable questions of someone that you do not know well.
Visiting
Arrange a visit before going to a British person’s house. Do not
arrive unannounced or bring friends and family along unless you’ve
asked them beforehand.
Avoid arriving early to one's house unless you’ve asked the host.
It is generally okay to be 10 to 15 minutes late to a small gathering
of people. However, if you are meeting at a restaurant, it is
important to be punctual as people will wait for you to order their
food.
Being late is more acceptable when attending parties and large
social gatherings.
If you visit a British home, you may not always receive a tour of the
house, and many of the doors might be closed out of privacy.
Avoid overstaying your welcome by remaining at a British person’s
home longer than expected unless they urge you to stay.
Gift Giving
Gifts are typically only given on special occasions (e.g. birthdays,
Christmas).
People tend to open gifts in front of the giver, either upon receiving
them or later along with other presents.
Recipients don’t usually expect to receive gifts of a high monetary
value, but rather that the gift will reflect their interests.
Token gifts may be given when visiting someone (e.g. wine,
chocolate).
Basic tips to remember when speaking
politely in English
When communicating in English, or any language for that matter, it’s
important to be polite. Here are a few basic tips and words to remember
when speaking politely in English.
Titles:
Male: ‘Mr.‘ (or ‘Mister’)
This is used when you know the person’s name, but they are older than you
and you want to be respectful. Perhaps it’s your girlfriend’s father or your
father’s friends. You would say ‘Mister’ and then their last name, so for
example: “Mr. Brown”. If you don’t know their name you can say ‘Sir’.
Female: ‘Mrs.’ or ‘Ms.’
‘Mrs.’ – as in “Mrs. Brown” – is only used to address a married woman, and
even then it might not be appropriate as nowadays many women choose not
to change their title when they get married. Sticking to the more general
‘Ms.’ may be a safer option to use.
Greetings:
When speaking in English we have many ways to say things, but some are
more polite and formal than others. For example:
“Good morning/afternoon/ evening”
“Goodbye”
“Have a nice day”
These are all ways to say ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’ in the workplace or a more
formal situation.
Minding your manners
Always remember to mind your manners! ‘Please’ and ‘thank you’ go a long
way when we speak to each other.
How would you speak to your boss? Your partner’s parents? Your best friend?
Your co-workers? Your new doctor? Try your best to speak politely no matter
where you are in the world. It’s just a nice thing to do.
Being polite in English
Can you pass me…? vs Give me…
People do not like being told what to do, so it’s sometimes difficult to get
what you want without causing frustration. Replace phrases that sound like
commands, such as “Give me the newspaper”, with a request like “Can
you pass me the newspaper?”
Could you give me five minutes? vs Go away
You’re really busy at work, but your coworker needs your help… When you’re
busy and can’t attend to anything else, just saying “Go away” is definitely
not appropriate. Instead, keep everyone happy by using the phrase “Could
you give me five minutes?”
Excuse me. vs Move
Telling someone to “Move out of the way” is extremely rude and is likely
going to get you a very negative reaction. The next time someone is in your
way, saying “Excuse me” will get the result you want without causing
offense!
I’m afraid I can’t. vs No.
It can often be difficult to decline an invitation from a friend. Simply
saying “No” would be considered impolite. The next time you have to refuse
an invitation, avoid offense by saying, “I’m afraid I can’t.”
I would like… vs I want…
It’s often considered rude to request something using the words, “I want”.
Instead of, “I want a cup of coffee”, try telling a waiter, “I’d like a cup of
coffee, please”. You’ll get your coffee and a smile, too!
Would you mind…? vs Stop it!
Someone doing something you don’t like, and perhaps being rude? Would
you like them to stop? To get the desired result, rather than shouting “Stop
talking on your phone in the cinema!”, ask them politely by
saying, “Would you mind not using your phone in the cinema, please?”
Can you hold, please? vs Wait.
Choosing the correct level of politeness on the telephone can mean the
difference between a constructive conversation and no conversation at all. If
a caller asks to speak with someone else, don’t say, “Wait”. Instead, politely
ask, “Can you hold, please?”
