VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 1

What is data commentary? What is the purpose of data commentary?

What is the best way to present your research data and findings?
How to present your research data and findings?

https://apastyle.apa.org/jars
Chapter 3, APA7. 3.5. Quantitative Research (Table 3.1)
3.13: Qualitative Research (Table 3.2); 3.18: Mixed Methods Research
(Table 3.3);

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 2

What is data commentary?
Data commentary is a key part of a research paper where you
interpret and analyze data from tables, graphs, or statistical
results.
It connects the data to your research questions, explains
patterns or anomalies, and justifies your arguments.
Good data commentary doesn’t just describe what the data
shows - it explains why it matters.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 3

 Why do we use a data commentary?
 What is the purpose of a data commentary?
 What do we need to do in a data commentary?

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 4

  Present the results of research – highlight the important
findings; compare and evaluate different data sets; assess
the reliability of data in terms of the methods that produced
it;
 Interpret the results.
 Discuss the significance and implications of the results.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 5

p.140: Seven common purposes given by Swales and Feak:
 highlight the results of research
 use the data to support a point or make an argument in your paper
 assess theory, common beliefs, or general practice in light of the given
data
 compare and evaluate different data sets
 assess the reliability of the data in terms of the methodology that
produced it
 discuss the implications of the data
 make recommendations
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 6
The art of the commentary is for you to find the right
strength of claim in discussing the data and then to order
your statements in some appropriate way (p.139)
Task 1, p.140

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 7

WHAT IS STRENGTH OF CLAIM IN DATA COMMENTARY?

Strength of claim refers to how confidently you state your

interpretation of the data in a commentary.
It reflects the degree of certainty or caution in your conclusions
based on the evidence you have.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 8

Choosing the right strength of claim is important as it:
 Helps you avoid overgeneralizing or misrepresenting data.
 Shows your awareness of limitations (e.g., sample size,
variability).
 Maintains academic objectivity and credibility.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 9

Degrees of Claim Strength (from cautious to strong)
Strength Typical Language When to Use
When the data is limited,
may suggest, appears to,
Cautious ambiguous, or not statistically
could indicate, is likely to
significant

suggests, indicates, seems When trends are clear but not

Moderate
to show, tends to definitive or generalizable

clearly shows, demonstrates,When data is robust, statistically

Strong
proves, confirms significant, and consistent
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 10
Examples in Context (Using Visual Aids in Vocabulary Teaching)
Cautious Claim: "The data may suggest that the use of visual aids
supports vocabulary retention, although further research is needed to
confirm this trend."
Moderate Claim: "The findings indicate that students exposed to
visual aids performed better in vocabulary tests than those in the
control group."
Strong Claim: "The post-test results clearly demonstrate that visual
aids significantly improve vocabulary acquisition in primary students."

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 11

 In a data commentary, your main job is to go beyond just
presenting data - you need to explain, analyze, and
interpret it. Think of a data commentary as a bridge
between raw data (tables, charts, quotes, statistics) and
your research questions or arguments.
 Be accurate, honest, and proportional in your claims.
Match the strength of your language to the strength of
your evidence.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 12

WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IN A DATA COMMENTARY
1. Refer to the Data Clearly
Start by telling the reader what data you’re commenting on, e.g.
“Table 1 presents the results of the post-test...”
“As shown in Figure 3, the trend in vocabulary retention...”
2. Summarize Key Findings
Give a concise summary of the most important patterns or results
(e.g.,What’s increasing or decreasing? What stands out? What’s the
difference between groups?,...)
“The experimental group outperformed the control group in all sections.”
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 13
3. Highlight Significant or Unexpected Results
Point out results that are:
- Statistically significant
- Unexpected or contradictory
- Particularly relevant to your research questions
E.g. “Notably, students in rural areas outperformed their urban
counterparts in vocabulary recall, which contradicts earlier findings.”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 14

4. Interpret the Meaning of the Data and Connect It to
Your Research Question or Theory
This is the core part of the data commentary. Ask yourself:
- What does the data mean?
- Why might this have happened?
- How does this support (or challenge) your research question,
hypothesis, or theory?
E.g., “These findings suggest that using visual aids may reduce
cognitive load, making vocabulary easier to retain.”
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 15
5. Evaluate or Compare (if applicable)
If you have multiple data sets (e.g., pre-test vs. post-test,
experimental vs. control), compare them to see:
- What changed?
- Which group improved more?
- What does the comparison reveal?
E.g., “Compared to the pre-test, students’ post-test scores
improved by 25%, indicating measurable learning gains.”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 16

6. Use Appropriate Language (Claim Strength)
Match the strength of your claim to the quality of your
evidence:
Use cautious language when findings are inconclusive.
Use confident language when results are clear and significant.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 17

Sentence Starters You Can Use
Function Sentence Starter
Referring to data “Table 2 shows that…” / “According to Figure 1…”
“Overall, the data reveal…” / “The main trend observed
Summarizing
is…”
“Notably, there was a sharp increase in…” / “An
Highlighting
unexpected result is…”
Interpreting “This suggests that…” / “One possible explanation is…”
“In comparison to…” / “While Group A improved,
Comparing
Group B remained constant…”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 18

Data commentaries usually have these elements in the following order:
1. location statement telling the reader where to find the data (Example: “Table 2 presents the test
scores of the experimental and control groups.”)
2. summary statement summarizing the most important features or patterns (Example: “Overall,
the experimental group performed significantly better than the control group across all tasks.”)
3. highlighting statement pointing out notable trends, comparisons, or anomalies (Example:
“Interestingly, students in the control group showed improvement in vocabulary retention, but not in
reading comprehension.”)
4. interpretation/discussion of implications, problems, exceptions, recommendations, or other
interesting aspects of the data, i.e., explaining why these findings are significant and how they relate
to your research (Example: “These results suggest that the gamified approach enhanced students’
motivation and engagement, leading to better comprehension outcomes.”)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 19

Quantitative & Qualitative Data Commentaries
Writing data commentaries for quantitative and qualitative
research requires different strategies, as they deal with different
types of data and analysis methods.
1. Quantitative Data Commentary
Quantitative research deals with numbers, statistics, and
measurable outcomes. Your data commentary should focus on
interpreting statistical results, identifying patterns, and
explaining what the numbers mean in relation to your research
questions.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 20
Structure for Quantitative Data Commentary
 Location: Refer to where the data is presented (e.g., Table 1,
Figure 2).
 Summary: Highlight major trends, differences, or
similarities.
 Details: Discuss significant values (means, percentages, p-
values, etc.).
 Interpretation: Explain what the data suggests and connect
it to your hypotheses or research aims.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 21
Example:
 As shown in Table 1, students in the experimental group
scored significantly higher (M = 6.75, SD = 0.89) than those
in the control group (M = 5.10, SD = 1.12) on the post-test.
This suggests that the gamified vocabulary instruction had a
positive impact on students’ learning outcomes. The p-value
of 0.002 confirms that the difference is statistically
significant.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 22

2. Qualitative Data Commentary
Qualitative research deals with themes, narratives, and
meanings. Your commentary should interpret what
participants said, why it matters, and how it relates to your
research objectives.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 23

Structure for Qualitative Data Commentary
 Introduce the theme or code: Identify the theme from your
analysis.
 Use direct quotes or summaries: Show what participants
said.
 Interpret the meaning: Analyze the underlying implications
or patterns.
 Connect to research aims: Explain how the theme
addresses your research question.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 24
Example:
 One recurring theme that emerged from the interviews was
"increased learner autonomy." For example, Participant A
mentioned, “The app lets students choose their pace, so they
don’t feel pressured.” This suggests that digital tools
supported learners' sense of control, aligning with the
autonomy component of Self-Determination Theory.
Multiple participants expressed similar sentiments, indicating
that the tool fostered more independent engagement with
learning tasks.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 25

 Paragraph structure of a data commentary
- Topic sentence (claim)
- Location element and summaries (support)
- Highlights (examples)
- Implications (restatement of claim)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 26

Look at the following example

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 27

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 28
 Starting a data commentary
Location element Summary
Table 2 shows the points of computer viruses for US
businesses.

Table 3 provides details of the fertilizer used.

Figure 2 plots the two series for the last five years.
Figure 4.2 gives the results of the second experiment.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 29

Location Elements and Summaries

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 30

Summary + Location Element with Passive Voice

Note: The use of verbs is in present tense as the author is

talking about his or her present study. In English, the active forms
are just as appropriate as the passive versions.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 31
Depending on what you are writing, you may want to focus
more on some significant aspects of the data rather than
merely generally pointing out what data is provided. This
indication may be particularly important when you are using
data to make a point. For example, if you want to argue that
students are likely to engage in misbehavior on the internet
regardless of how they access it, you could write this sentence.
Table 5 shows that students engage in misbehavior on the
internet using both private and public computers.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 32

If your point is that wealth increases slowly with age but
decreases quickly after reaching a peak, you could write this
sentence.
Figure 1 reveals that wealth is accumulated slowly, but sharply
declines after age 65.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 33

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 34
 Fi

Figure 6.2: Mean percentile scores by MLA subtest: French

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 35

 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
 1. Which sentences in the example present the actual results of the
study?
 2. How are the results of the study described in the first of these
sentences?
 3. Which findings from this study are described numerically in
the text? Why do you think the authors chose to mention these
particular data?

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 36

Ordering your information
The result section in research reports in many fields normally consists
of these basic elements of information.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 37

Practice: Read the following results section from a report in the field of child psychology. It
describes the effects of a drug on boys who are overactive. Identify the sentences that correspond
to the three elements listed in the preceding box.
DEXTROAMPHETAMINE: COGNITIVE AND BEHAVIORAL EFFECTS IN NORMAL
PREPUBERTAL BOYS
Results
(1)The children left the testing center 3 hours after medication or placebo had been administered; parents
were asked to keep a diary record of behavior during the afternoon and evening. (2) Behavioral and
cognitive effects during the drug session are given in Figure 1 and Table 1.
(3) Behavioral ratings showed both immediate and delayed effects which differed from each other. (4)
Amphetamine administration in comparison with placebo was associated with decreased motor activity
combined with generally improved attentional performance (faster reaction time, superior memory and
improved attention) and decreased galvanic skin response. (5) After drug administration, the children
appeared unusually inactive, not simply less restless. (6) There was an increase in task-related descriptive
speech and a decrease in speech not task-related, such as questions (Table 1). (7) These results are entirely
consistent with those reported for hyperactive children on stimulant medication in previous studies (12).

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 38

Discuss the questions:
 1. Which sentence locates the figure where results can be found?
 2. Which sentences present the most important results?
 3. Which sentence comments on the results?
 4. What is the function of the first sentence in the example?

 1. Sentence 2 locates the figure.

 2. Sentences 3-6 present the most important results
 3. Sentence 7 comments on the results.
 4. Sentence 1 briefly indicates how the data was obtained.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 39

Commenting on Results -Two Patterns
ALTERNATING PATTERN: R1 + C1 ; R2 + C2 ; R3 + C3
SEQUENTIAL PATTERN: R1 + R2 + R3 + C
R = result; C = comment

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 40

Look at the two results sections that follow, both from the field of
educational psychology. Decide whether the authors used the alternating
pattern or the sequential pattern in commenting on their results.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 41

A. COMPARISON OF HEMISPHERIC PREFERENCE BETWEEN HIGH ABILITY AND
LOW ABILITY ELEMENTARY CHILDREN
Results
Results indicated that children in the high ability group responded as having significantly greater
integrated hemispheric responses than did the low ability group [t (68) = 5.34, p <.01]. The low
ability group responded with a significantly greater preference for right hemispheric responses [t (68)
= 2.55, p < .01] than did the high ability group. In addition, the low ability group also displayed a
significantly greater preference for the left hemispheric responses [t (68) = 4.87, p < .01] than did the
high ability group.(see Table 1).
The data from the two sub-categories measuring left or right hemispheric preferences suggest that the
children who are displaying learning problems and who are not achieving up to the norm in school-
related subjects are depending on one hemisphere and its mode of thought.
Whether the dominance is on either the left or right cerebral hemisphere, the cognitive development
of the low ability students is not adequate as evidenced by the placement of these children in special
learning disability or educable mentally handicapped classes.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 42
B. FEARS OF SENEGALESE SECONDARY SCHOOL STUDENTS
Results
The findings for the whole sample are summed by sex and by socioeconomic level in Table 1.
Family (7.1%). Students entered the following items: fear of my parents (2.9%), fear of my father (4.2%)
(when he beats me, 1.5%; when he is furious 1.4%; when he chides me, 1.3%). That fathers should have such
a high score results from the fact that Wolofs are an ethnic group reputed for the severity with which children
are brought up (18). This severe education of the child seems to be mostly the responsibility of the father (20).
Imagination, supernatural phenomena (6.4%). Under this heading were entered sorcerers, evil genii, evil
spirits, ghosts (4.1%), God (2.1%) and nightmares (.2%). A close comparison between the answers in the
present questionnaire and those in Bariaud et al. (3) reveals that fear of nightmares (3.1%) is greater with the
French sample than with ours. Conversely, fear of superstitions seems to be greater in Senegal. A tentative
interpretation might be that in Senegal the supernatural seems to be part and parcel of everyday life, and
nightmares ore just one vehicle among several others expressing it. For the French students, on the contrary,
the supernatural seems to boil down to irrational and naive superstitions that science and technology will soon
eradicate. Nightmares, therefore, serve as the last socially acceptable outlet for all the fears and superstitions
that have resisted scientific processing.
Animal (5.9%). This item remains important even for older students, which contradicts Bamber's (2) and
Mauer's (13) findings ...
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 43
A. Sequential Pattern
B. Alternating Pattern
Functions of Comments (Element 3)
Comments may:
1. generalize from the results;
2. explain possible reasons for the results;
3. compare the results with results from other studies.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 44

There are many useful ways to present your research data to editors, referees,
and readers.
Summarizing your data in a visual form, including tables, figures, line graphs,
pie/bar charts can be very helpful.
It allows you to present your results in a consolidated manner and helps
readers to get an overview of the most important findings of your work
without having to go through the entire manuscript.
Tables and figures are particularly effective when large amounts of
information have to be presented and discussed.
Chapter 7: Tables & Figures (APA7)
General Guidelines for Tables and Figures; 7.9: Table Components (Table
7.1); Sample Tables (Tables 7.2 - 7.24); 7.20 - 7.21; Figures 7.22 - 7.36;
7.36: Sample Figures (Figure 7.2-7.21)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 45

Describing charts
Steps for writing chart descriptions
Step 1: Write your first paragraph that includes:
- a sentence that explains what the chart is about.
- a sentence that describes the overall trend. End your first paragraph
here.
Step 2: Start a new paragraph (or paragraphs) and illustrate the main
stages in the trend.
Remember to include some figures.
Step 3: Write a concluding sentence.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 46
 Practice
The model answer below describes the chart showing the consumption of fast food in the UK (per week)
from 1970 to 1990. Unfortunately, in this writing there are 10 mistakes among 20 numbered words or
phrases. Write the numbers indicating the 10 mistakes.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 47

The line graph compares the weekly consumption of (1) four different types of fast food in
the UK (2) between 1970 and 1990.
It is clear (3) from the graph that the (4) number of Fish & Chips consumed per week
experienced the most (5) slight change during the research period. Additionally, while the
quantities of Hamburger and Fish & Chips eaten both (6) rose significantly, there was a slight
(7) increase in the figure for pizza.
In 1970, the amount of Pizza consumed was (8) highest, at more than 300 grams, (9) while
the figure for Hamburger was significantly (10) lowest, at only around 30 grams. Meanwhile,
(11) approximately 80 grams of Fish & Chips were eaten by UK people. In 1985, Pizza
consumption slightly (12) rose and (13) reached the lowest point of 200 grams, (14) whereas
the other two figures gradually (15) go up.
In 1990, Fish & Chips weekly consumption (16) decreased dramatically to 500 grams and
became the (17) higher figure in the line graph, while Hamburger’s figure (18) experienced a
slight rise to about 300 grams. (19) On the same time, the amount of Pizza eaten remained
(20) stable at roughly 200 grams.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 48
The line graph compares the weekly consumption of (1) three different types of fast
food in the UK (2) between 1970 and 1990.
It is clear (3) from the graph that the (4) amount of Fish & Chips consumed per week
experienced the most (5) dramatic change during the research period. Additionally,
while the quantities of Hamburger and Fish & Chips eaten both (6) rose significantly,
there was a slight (7) decrease in the figure for pizza.
In 1970, the amount of Pizza consumed was (8) the highest, at more than 300 grams,
(9) while the figure for Hamburger was significantly (10) lower, at only around 30
grams. Meanwhile, (11) approximately 80 grams of Fish & Chips were eaten by UK
people. In 1985, Pizza consumption slightly (12) fell and (13) reached the lowest point
of 200 grams, (14) whereas the other two figures gradually (15) went up.
In 1990, Fish & Chips weekly consumption (16) increased dramatically to 500 grams
and became the (17) highest figure in the line graph, while Hamburger’s figure (18)
experienced a slight rise to about 300 grams. (19) At the same time, the amount of Pizza
eaten remained (20) stable at roughly 200 grams.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 49
The table below shows the results of a survey of the average number of cars
per hour using three suburban roads during working hours in a ten-year
pollution monitoring programme. Traffic calming was introduced in Harper
Lane at the beginning of 1999. Unfortunately, in this writing there are 10
mistakes among 17 numbered words or phrases. Write the numbers
indicating the 10 mistakes.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 50

The table illustrates the average (1) amount of vehicles using three roads from
1993 to 2002. (2) Between 1993 and 1998, the average number of cars using
Harper Lane (3) declined from 82 vehicles per hour to 915, which had a (4) tenfold
rise. Great York Way saw barely any (5) fall in traffic, increasing (6) from an
hourly rate of 600 vehicles to around 700. The traffic travelling down Long Lane
increased (7) by 50% during the period, from 400 to 700 vehicles. After the traffic
calming (8) is introduced in Harper Lane at the beginning of 1999, the volume of
traffic fell (9) slightly to an hourly average of 204 cars, considerably (10) less than
in 1998. Since then, the number of cars (11) stabilized at just below the 1999 level.
(12) By contrast, there was a (13) gradual rise in that of Great York Way, from 695
in 1998 to (14) 911 in 1999 where it remained relatively (15) fluctuated till the
year 2002. Long Lane witnessed a significant (16) increase in vehicle numbers
(17) with the hourly average soaring to 1400 in 2002. It can be seen from the data
that the traffic calming had the desired effect.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 51
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 52
Tips for Effective Commentary
 Avoid simply describing the data—explain what it shows and
why it matters.
 Use cautious language when interpreting (e.g., “suggests,”
“may indicate”) unless results are statistically significant.
 Refer back to your research questions or hypotheses to stay
focused.
 Use transition words (e.g., however, in contrast, notably) to
show relationships.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 53
 LANGUAGE CONVENTIONS FOR REPORTING THE RESULTS

Tenses used when reporting the results

The results are things that we found before we started writing the paper. They therefore
relate to past events, consequently the past simple is used to report them, often in a
mixture of the active and passive forms.
When describing the results, we can use an impersonal style. This serves to add an element
of objectivity to the findings. For instance, we may NOT say:
- We found that doctors viewed the National Health Service as having failed to provide
adequate services.
Instead the impersonal style says:
- There was a perceived failure of the National Health Service to provide adequate
services.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 54
However, both of them are accepted styles.
Here is an extract from another paper, which uses an impersonal
style.
- Three levels of feedback were looked at for differences on
task persistence. Differences between positive, negative, and
no feedback conditions, were minimal and showed no
significant findings … There were larger differences both
between genders and in the interaction between gender and
feedback conditions. Tables 1 and 2 show the averages for
these gender differences. Figure 6 shows …
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 55
Language Conventions for Reporting Results
1. Quantitative Research
When reporting numerical data, statistical analysis, or measurable
outcomes, use:
 Neutral & Objective Tone (e.g., “The data show that…”; “The
results indicate…”; “There was a significant difference between…”;
“The mean score increased from 6.2 to 7.8.”
 Use Past Tense as you're reporting completed results: (e.g., “The
students performed better in the post-test.”; “A t-test was conducted
to compare the two groups.”)
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 56
 Use clear terms when referring to statistics: (e.g., “The
experimental group scored significantly higher (M = 8.5, SD =
0.9).”; “The difference was statistically significant (p < 0.05).”)
 Choose language strength based on evidence: (e.g., “The
findings suggest that…” (cautious); “The results confirm
that…” (confident, when strong evidence)
Example: Table 2 shows that the experimental group
outperformed the control group on the vocabulary test (M = 7.65,
SD = 1.04) with a statistically significant difference (p < 0.05).

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 57

2. Qualitative Research
When reporting themes, narratives, or perceptions, use:
 Present or Past Tense
 Present: When the theme is being interpreted generally (e.g.,
“The data reveal a strong preference for group work.”)
 Past: When referring to what someone said or described
(e.g., “One participant noted, ‘I learn better with pictures.’”)
 Introduce and explain themes clearly: (e.g.,“One recurring
theme was ‘lack of vocabulary support.’”; “Students
frequently mentioned that visual aids made learning easier.”)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 58

 Use reporting verbs and vary your verbs to present findings
clearly: (e.g., “Participants reported, described, expressed, felt,
explained, stated…”)
 Support findings with direct quotes of participants' own words:
(e.g., “As one student said, ‘I can remember the words better with
pictures.’”)
Example:
A key theme that emerged was “increased learner autonomy.” One
teacher explained, “Students learn better when they can control the pace.”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 59

Common Reporting Verbs by Function

Function Verbs
show, reveal, indicate, present,
Stating results
demonstrate
suggest, imply, support, appear
Suggesting interpretations
to indicate
state, report, mention, describe,
Reporting participant views
explain, note, observe
increase, decrease, differ, remain,
Comparing data
rise, fall, fluctuate
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 60
Verbs used in Indicative and Informative Location
Statements
 Indicative statement that summarizes what kind of research
was done. Example:
Table 4 shows the types of internet misbehavior common among
university students.
 Informative statement that highlights something interesting
about the data. Example:
Table 4 shows that illegal downloading of music or films is
common among students.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 61
Task 4, p.150

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 62

 p.152

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 63

Another common way to introduce informative statements is the linking as
clause. Here are some examples.
As shown in Fig. 1 and Fig. 2, the companies used in this
survey varied significantly in geographical location, size, and
method of operation.
As can be seen in Table 6, the overall rate of recall, while low,
also showed considerable variation.
In the passive, these linking clauses have no subjects. Compare the
following sentences.
a. As it has been proved, the theory may have practical importance.
(Because the theory has been proved, it may have practical
importance.)
b. As has been proved, the theory may have practical importance.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 64
Using prepositions with this type of linking statement can be tricky.
Here are some of the main standard uses.
 in: As shown in Table 1 ....
 by: As predicted by the model ....
 on: As described on the previous page ....

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 65

Practice
The following data commentary, which is based on Dr. Akiko Okamura's
(2000) research on how Japanese researchers learn to write in English in
their chosen field, is missing references to the non-verbal data given in
Table 8. Expand the commentary by first starting with a location +
summary statement and then by adding a suitable linking as clause. Review
the material presented up to this point before you begin.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 66

p.155

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 67

....
Slightly more than three-fourths of the scientists surveyed adopted
writing strategies that involved the use of their first language.
Moreover, less than a quarter appear capable of writing directly in
English. Overall, the figures would appear to suggest that most
Japanese scientists have difficulties and frustrations when
preparing papers for English-medium journals.
Table 8 ... As can be seen in the table ...

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 68

According to the data presented in Table 8 (Okamura, 2000), a
significant majority of Japanese scientists - 61% - reported that
they primarily think in Japanese while writing in English, and an
additional 16% indicated that they think in both Japanese and
English during the writing process. Together, these figures suggest
that 77% of the respondents rely, at least in part, on their first
language when composing scientific texts in English. In contrast,
only 23% reported the ability to think and write entirely in
English. These findings imply that most Japanese scientists may
encounter linguistic challenges or cognitive strain when preparing
manuscripts for English-medium publications.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 69

Highlighting statements (p.156)
 The central sections of data commentaries consist of
highlighting statements. They draw readers’ attention to
important, surprising, or noteworthy features of the data. They
help the reader focus on key patterns, contrasts, or outliers
that are relevant to your research goals.
 When highlighting key findings in a data commentary, do not
just describe them, but show why they matter in the context of
your research. Strengthen the interpretation and impact of
your data commentary, and often use emphatic or contrastive
language.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 70
Functions of Highlighting Statements
Function Example
“The most notable trend is the high
Emphasize a major result
reliance on the first language.”
“In contrast to expectations, only 23%
Point out an exception or contrast
wrote directly in English.”
“Surprisingly, fewer than one-quarter of
Signal something surprising
scientists bypassed L1 use.”

“This suggests that writing in English

Show relevance or implication
may remain cognitively demanding.”
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 71
Example (Table 8, p.155)
Summary: “As shown in Table 8, 61% of Japanese scientists
reported thinking mainly in Japanese when writing in English.”
Highlighting statement: “Notably, this figure suggests that
reliance on the first language remains the dominant strategy,
even in professional scientific writing.”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 72

Useful Phrases for Highlighting Statements:
Emphasizing Key Findings:
 Notably, …
 A key trend is that …
 The most striking result is …
 It is important to note that …
Highlighting Contrasts or Differences:
 In contrast to …
 Unlike previous studies, …
 Surprisingly, …
 An unexpected result is that …

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 73

Pointing Out Implications:
 This finding highlights the need for …
 These results raise concerns about …
 This suggests a strong influence of …

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 74

 p.156
When highlighting key findings, it is an opportunity for you to
demonstrate that:
• you can spot trends or regularities in the data.
• you can separate more important findings from less important ones.
• you can make claims of appropriate strength.
So DO NOT
• simply repeat all the details in words.
• attempt to cover all the information.
• claim more than is reasonable or defensible.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 75

What to Do When Highlighting Key Findings:
Identify the Most Important Patterns or Trends
 Focus on results that stand out or support your main argument.
 Look for highest/lowest values, biggest changes, or statistically
significant results.
Example: “A majority of participants (61%) reported thinking mainly
in Japanese while writing in English, highlighting the dominant role of
the first language in academic writing.” (Table 8, p.155)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 76

Point Out Contrasts, Differences, or Surprises
Highlight unexpected results or differences between groups.
Compare with predictions, past research, or your hypothesis.
Example: “Surprisingly, only 23% of the scientists reported
thinking and writing entirely in English, which contrasts with
expectations given the global nature of scientific
communication.” (Table 8, p.155)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 77

Use Emphatic or Focused Language - Use phrases that
signal importance or direct attention:
 “Notably…”
 “It is worth highlighting that…”
 “The most striking result is…”
 “An unexpected finding was…”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 78

Explain why it matters, saying why it is important for:
 your research question
 the learners or participants
 the theoretical framework
 practical implications
Example: “This reliance on L1 strategies may suggest
cognitive challenges in writing directly in English, which has
implications for academic writing instruction in EFL contexts.”
(Table 8, p.155)
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 79
Use Accurate and Proportional Claims
 Be honest about the strength of the finding.
 Use cautious language if the data is not conclusive.
 Cautious: “This trend may suggest…”
 Strong: “These results clearly indicate…”

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 80

Example:
 A key finding from Table 8 is that a substantial majority
(77%) of Japanese scientists rely on Japanese—either fully
or partially—when writing in English. This suggests that
first language influence plays a significant role in their
writing process, potentially indicating ongoing challenges in
achieving fluency or confidence in English academic writing.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 81

An Introduction to Qualifications and Strength of Claim
p.159

and indicating your stance toward your claims.

Your stance or perspective is important in academic writing because it allows
you to reveal not only what you know, bur also what you think.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 82
 The way in which you reveal your stance contributes to author positioning.
 To reveal your stance, you can, for instance, indicate your attitude (for
example, I think); soften or hedge your claim as in it is likely that; or
employ boosters to strengthen your points such as clearly there is a need
to. These stance markers are part of your textual or disciplinary voice (Hyland,
2008). (Read in the book, pp.156-158 for more information)
 Do task 9 (p.158) in the book.
 Read the data commentaries from MICUSP that were written by two different
students; the first is a doctoral student in Psychology and the second is a
graduate student in Operations Engineering. Underline the words or phrases
that seem to express caution in making a claim. Circle language that boosts
any claims.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 83
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 84
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 85
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 86
Specific Ways of Moderating or Qualifying a Claim
Likelihood
 There are many ways of expressing your degree of
commitment to your claims in written academic English.
One simple way is to use a modal auxiliary (e.g., may,
might, or could).
 Notice how the claim changes in these sentences. Which
one is the strongest? Which is the most cautious?

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 87

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 88
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 89
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 90
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 91
 An alternative strategy to distance yourself from the data is to
attribute your point to someone else or to other studies,
which can indicate that it is «soft."

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 92

Softening Generalizations
Generalizations can be effectively used either to start developing a
point for which support is later provided or drawing a conclusion
from different pieces of information. Importantly, generalizations
should be grounded in some reasonable evidence and stated
cautiously so that they will be accepted by readers.
Three classic verbs for carefully stating a generalization are the
verbs ‘appear (to)’, ‘seem (to)’, and ‘tend (to)’.
 Children living in poverty appear to do poorly in school.
 Children living in poverty seem to do poorly in school.
 Children living in poverty tend to do poorly in school.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 93

Another way to make a generalization more acceptable is to
quantify (limit) the subject.
 Many children living in poverty do poorly in school.
 A majority of children living in poverty do poorly in school.
 Some children living in poverty do poorly in school.
 In most parts of the world children living in poverty do poorly
in school.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 94

A third alternative is to add exceptions.
With the exception of / Apart from / Except for those
enrolled in specialized programs, children living in poverty
do poorly in school.
Finally, claims can be reduced in strength by choosing
a weaker verb. Compare these claims:
 Many studies have concluded that excessive credit growth
caused the global financial crisis. (stronger)
 Many studies have concluded that excessive credit growth
contributed to the global financial crisis. (weaker)
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 95
Combined Qualifications
Sometimes several types of qualifications are combined in order to construct a
defensible claim, as shown in this example. We start with a strong claim. When
people have too many choices, they choose the safest one.
Now see what happens when the following qualifications are added.
+ according to some recent research (adding distance)
+ in some cases (weakening the generalization)
+ tend to (indicating likelihood)
But AVOID excessive qualification and overly cautious claims. Below is an
example of excessive qualification or too much caution:
It could be concluded that some evidence seems to suggest that at least certain
villagers might not have traded their pottery with others outside the
community.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 96
Organization
Data commentaries are usually ordered from general to specific.
Decisions about organization, however, become more complex with
comparative data.
Consider the following case: You are taking a graduate course in the
social sciences. You have been studying differences in parental behavior
with regard to their adolescent children. Your instructor suggests that,
contrary to popular belief, American parents may be stricter with their
teenage sons than they are with their daughters. You are given Table 10
on page 166, which is based on a survey conducted among suburban
families in a midsize midwestern U.S. city, and asked to prepare a short
commentary on the main findings.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 97
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 98
Task 12, p.166: The information in this task contributed to a
published study of how children begin to make choices regarding
the time spent on doing homework and watching television, as
well as deciding how to spend their money. Read the incomplete
data commentaries based on Table 10 written by three students.
The commentaries (on pages 166-167) include only the location
statements and some highlighting statements. What are the
differences among the three? Which do you think makes the
best highlighting statement? Why?

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 99

p.166, task 12

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 100

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 101
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 102
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 103
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 104
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 105
COMPARISONS

Fifty-six percent of girls report that their parents

decide matters of faith in contrast to 64% of boys.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 106
  Fewer girls than boys reported that their parents decide
matters of faith.
 More boys than girls reported that their parents decide
matters of faith.
 Not as many boys reported that their parents decide
matters of faith.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 107

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 108
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 109
Task 13, p.169 - Groupwork
Write a full data commentary for Table 10. Begin with a
location element and summary. Create whatever highlighting
statements you want. In Task Eleven, Students A, B, and C
offered no cautious explanations of the results. When you write
your commentary, be sure to do so. Review the two Language
Focus sections on qualifications and strength of claim (pages
156-157 and 159-163).

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 110

DISCUSSION OF STUDY RESULTS
The discussion section is one of the final parts of a research paper, in which
you engage in three necessary steps: describe, analyze, and interpret your
findings.
They explain the significance of those results and tie everything back to
the research question(s).
The discussion reviews the findings and puts them into the context of the
overall research.
It brings together all the sections that come before it and allows a reader to
see the connections between each part of the research paper.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 111

“Discussion” section moves the reader back from the specific information
reported in the methods and the results sections to a more general view of
how the findings should be interpreted. In other words, researchers make
explicit their own views on the study and its findings in order to tell the
reader whether their research answers the research questions, and
discuss the implications of the research for future researchers.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 112

Read the following discussion section from a research report in
the field of applied psychology. In this study the productivity of
older and younger factory workers was compared. What kinds
of information that are included in this example?

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 113

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 114
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 115
Ordering your information
In the discussion, the information that you include in this section depends
greatly on the findings of your study; however, the specific-to-general
movement is a convention that most writers follow. The discussion
typically summarizes the study, discusses theoretical and practical
implications and limitations of the study, and offers suggestions for further
research.
The elements 1, 2, 3, and 4 are typically those that refer most directly to
the study and its findings, while the elements 5, 6 focus more generally on
the importance that the study may have for other workers in the field. Also,
the order of discussion elements shown here is not strictly followed by all
authors.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 116
INFORMATION ELEMENTS IN DISCUSSION:
Specific Reference to the Study
Element 1: A reference to the main purpose of the study;
Element 2: A review of the most important findings, whether or not they agree with
the findings of other researchers;
Element 3: Possible explanations for or speculations about the findings;
Element 4: Limitations of the study that restrict the extent to which the findings can
be generalized.

General Statements about the Study

Element 5: Implications of the study (generalizations from the results);
Element 6: Recommendations for future research and practical applications.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 117
 NOTE: The kinds of information that you can include in
your discussion section are not fixed. In elements 3, 4, 5, 6,
the researcher may take a position with respect to the
explanations, implications, limitations, or applications of
the findings.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 118

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 119
The discussion section from a research report in the field of sociology is given here, with the
sentences in scrambled order. Rearrange and number the sentences in the order that you
think the authors originally wrote them.
SCHOLASTIC DISHONESTY AMONG COLLEGE UNDERGRADUATES
A. We therefore recommend that colleges that wish to prevent cheating should not
emphasize the social environment to the detriment of the intellectual environment.
B. It seems clear that both theories are able to explain statistically significant
amounts of variance in college cheating.
C. The two perspectives examined were (1) culture conflict theory, and (2) internal
social control theory.
D. In the first case, we can expect that to the extent that a student has a high level
of culture conflict orientation, he or she will have an increased probability of
cheating.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 120

 E. This research has attempted to assess two theories of deviant behavior
in terms of their ability to account for cheating among a sample of college
students (N = 650).
 F. Finally, since there was a surprising lack of consensus among the
students in our sample on precisely which activities their faculty members
were likely to see as forbidden, we further recommend that faculty
members would do well to take time occasionally to clarify precisely what
will be defined as “scholastic dishonesty” in their classes.
 G. On the other hand, to the extent that he has a high level of internal
social control, his tendency to engage in cheating should be
correspondingly reduced.
 E–C–B–D–G–A–F

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 121

LANGUAGE CONVENTIONS IN DISCUSSION SECTION
 The verb tenses used in the discussion section depend on the type of information
you want to present.
 The verb tense most commonly used in referring to the purpose and the findings is
the simple past.
Element 1: Referring to the purpose
 EXAMPLE: This research attempted to assess two theories of behavior.
Element 2: Restating the findings
 EXAMPLE: The principle of readability was not followed in the income tax booklet
of any of the states studied except Virginia.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 122

Comparing findings
 When comparing your findings to those of other researchers, use the
present tense.
 EXAMPLE: These results are in substantial agreement with those of
Bates (2020).
 In discussion statements that explain possible reasons for, or
limitations to, the findings, the past, present, or modal auxiliaries
may be used. The choice depends on whether the explanation for the
specific findings is restricted to your study (past) or whether it refers
to a general condition (present). Modal auxiliaries may also be used to
emphasize the speculative nature of these statements.
VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 123
Element 3: Explaining the findings:
 EXAMPLE: It is possible that microbial activity caused some
immobilization of labial soil phosphorous. (Restricted to study)
 EXAMPLE: It is possible that microbial activity causes some
immobilization of labial soil phosphorous. (General condition)

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 124

Expressions are typically used when you need to explain your findings.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 125

Element 4: Limiting the findings
 EXAMPLE: Our sample was very small.
 EXAMPLE: Other industries may produce different results.
All studies have limitations, and most readers will understand that a different
sample or different measures might have produced different results. Unless
there is good reason to think they would have, however, there is no reason to
mention these routine issues. Instead, pick two or three limitations that seem
like they could have influenced the results, explain how they could have
influenced the results, and suggest ways to deal with them.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 126

Element 5: Implications
 EXAMPLE: It appears that squatter housing markets behave as
economically rational entities.

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 127

 Expressions are used when you wish to suggest the
implications of your findings

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 128

 Element 6: Recommendations and applications
 EXAMPLE: The approach outlined in this study should be
replicated in other manufacturing plants.
 EXAMPLE: We recommend that the approach outlined in
this study be replicated in other manufacturing plants

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 129

Modal Verbs: Degree of Tentativeness

VU THI HONG VAN 7/5/2025 130