Lil' Mama's Rules

Li'l Mama's Rules is one of the books that I considered to be ahead of it's time. Sheneska Jackson arrived on the scene when the issue of HIV/AIDS in the African-American community was still fresh, misunderstood, and often ignored. Back in the day, there were no public service announcements advising people, "Be positive that you're negative" and BET wasn't promoting the "Rap it Up" campaign. But there was Rae. Rae Lewis-Thornton that is. Lewis-Thornton was featured on the December 1994 issue of Essence magazine and she was HIV positive.

As I read Li'l Mama's Rules for the first time in 1998 all I could see was Lewis-Thornton's face. Her beauty had me in awe as I thought she is too cute to be sick. Let me say, I was 16 when that Essence magazine came out and she taught me early on that looks didn't matter. So when I read Li'l Mama's Rules at the tender age of 19 going on 20, I was hit with another dose of reality as it pertained to the epidemic that was affecting women and girls that looked like me but no one wanted to talk about it.

Madison Maguire, the leading lady, is the epitome of what many young girls want to be when they grow up. She's attractive, intelligent, educated, has a nice career in sunny Los Angeles, and most of all, she isn't anyone's baby mama. While living it up, Madison has the joy of playing the field and dating whoever she wants as long as they follow the rules, Li'l Mama's Rules that is. According to Madison, "My dating rules are mainly for my own peace of mind, so I don't have to put up with shit I don't like."

But, somewhere along the way things get twisted for Madison. She is forced to face her demons and be real with herself about life, her life. She realizes that all the things that she said didn't matter, really did and it dictated every move she made in her life, the good, the bad and the ugly.

Li'l Mama's Rules is one of my all time favorites and please know I don't say that lightly. I was a young'un when I first read this book and it was an eye opener. It was the first book I read that dealt with the topic of HIV/AIDS head on without any constraints. It was raw and wretched as we like to say around my parts. The plot was so well-written that at my younger, wiser age of 31, I still love it and own it. The funniest thing to me is that I now have my own rules, Spinks' Rules. LOL! Like Madison, when I decided to go back to college, I decided that there would be no dating. I loves me a male specimen and I didn't want any distractions this time around so I stuck to my no dating rule. (Oh, I'll be finished with school December 2010! )

In addition to addressing the issue of HIV/AIDS, teen pregnancy and sex education, Jackson also gives ample exposure to Madison's little sister, Serena, who has Tourette's Syndrome. She takes the reader into the life of a teenager suffering with TS and how she copes with it. Before reading this book in 1998, I didn't know what TS was, so I couldn't imagine having to grow up with it.

In closing, let me say that too many of us are suffering from this avoidable disease. Yes, I know things happen but we have to be responsible for ourselves and love ourselves enough to go against the grain. If you read my blog then you know my brother died while HIV positive and above any and everything that has happened to me, that incident reigns supreme. After losing my brother so suddenly, at the young age of 32, I know my status and I am positive that I am negative. If you do nothing else after you read this post, please get tested, educate yourself, love yourself enough to protect yourself and know we all can live with the results.

Accountability & Responsibility