🪻 Junko Flores 🪻
@jvnkyard
it/its
This is Junko (Junkie and June are also accepted if we know each other).
I'm a very dissociated being, to the extent I can't safely say what am I, even on my own physical perception.
As a common rule, creature is the preferred term regardles of the scenario or how I feel. I can always relate to it, one way or another. Avoid referring to me as a person or human.
I'm a burnt out developer, currently on leave for mental health reasons. Your typical combo of autism and ADHD and a side of schizophrenia (brings paranoia and agoraphobia with it) and heavy dissociation. Despite all of this I am generally very friendly and affectionate with everyone.
I like linux and handling infra. During the transition of 2024 to 2025, working on lavenderfield is how I've kept myself busy and my sanity somewhat in check.
A lover of nature, an anarchist, a gardener, a witch. I defend and believe in the power of mutual aid and loving nature. I believe culture and knowledge should be open and free for everyone, along many other rights.
My love for nature ties into my spirituality. For the most part of my life I've been skeptical of anything spiritual and attached to science, which I still am, but living my spirituality through tarot, rituals, appreciation for nature, being thankful for the things that are important to me has and finding my own particular explanation for certain things in life, in my opinion, made me a better rounded being. I obviously know the logic and the facts of things, but life is already complicated enough as it is, there should be no shame in percieving things your own special way.
I blow out steam through music, mostly mixing. I don't think I'm particularly good at mixing sets yet, because honestly I really haven't gotten serious with it, but I try to record and share my sessions even with, what at least for me are, critical mistakes, but there is no shame and nothing to hide, the point of it all is sharing and appreciating music, maybe even coming up with something special in the process.
I'm also "learning" to play bass. Guitar will come after.
⚠ Content Warning ⚠
Uhhhhh- Drugs. Am I right? Either because my situation of disability, my will to live life and flow or just wanting to experience things, I really like trying out substances and being intoxicated. Given the schizophrenia, I completely avoid hallucinogens, no LSD, no shrooms.
I first started drinking alcohol when I was 14. And I got rather "late" to it, kids from my same age had started at age 12, even earlier. Let that sink in.
Never been too fond of alcohol during my teenage years, it has been more of an "acquired taste" along the years. I usually drink at night, in voice chat. Not daily, but lately been picking up a multiple-times-a-week type of pace.
At age 16 I started smoking tobacco, nothing special to say there, been chainsmoking since. Had a few periods of no smoking at all, the longest of them lasting about 6-8 months. But yeah, it's there, I don't really plan on trying to quit again. I always come back.
Weed at 18, this is where it gets spicy. Spent from my 18 to my 22 completely addicted and gone. Worked in the mornings, got stoned while not working. Minimum 3 joints a day. I could go into the fact that I completely wasted those good years on my life, but in reality, the thing to highlight here is the fact the daily use for so long was what triggered my heavy schizophrenia symptoms.
I still do the thing sometimes, but it only causes me paranoia, very rarely it gives me catharsis.
*Very positive experiences with MDMA which I will not speak about here*
Now, age 24. If you ever ask yourself "How does Junko function?". Two words. Elvanse and Xanax. Developing a bit of a nasty dependency to the latter. I can be thankful I have stockpiled a lot of it.
I literally have elaborated so much on the drug topic because I have used the collapsable box for the trigger warning that I thought I might as well get deep on it.
I'm a very dissociated being, to the extent I can't safely say what am I, even on my own physical perception.
"Sometimes a doll, sometimes a plant, sometimes slime, sometimes I can't feel my body at all."
As a common rule, creature is the preferred term regardles of the scenario or how I feel. I can always relate to it, one way or another. Avoid referring to me as a person or human.
I'm a burnt out developer, currently on leave for mental health reasons. Your typical combo of autism and ADHD and a side of schizophrenia (brings paranoia and agoraphobia with it) and heavy dissociation. Despite all of this I am generally very friendly and affectionate with everyone.
I like linux and handling infra. During the transition of 2024 to 2025, working on lavenderfield is how I've kept myself busy and my sanity somewhat in check.
A lover of nature, an anarchist, a gardener, a witch. I defend and believe in the power of mutual aid and loving nature. I believe culture and knowledge should be open and free for everyone, along many other rights.
My love for nature ties into my spirituality. For the most part of my life I've been skeptical of anything spiritual and attached to science, which I still am, but living my spirituality through tarot, rituals, appreciation for nature, being thankful for the things that are important to me has and finding my own particular explanation for certain things in life, in my opinion, made me a better rounded being. I obviously know the logic and the facts of things, but life is already complicated enough as it is, there should be no shame in percieving things your own special way.
I blow out steam through music, mostly mixing. I don't think I'm particularly good at mixing sets yet, because honestly I really haven't gotten serious with it, but I try to record and share my sessions even with, what at least for me are, critical mistakes, but there is no shame and nothing to hide, the point of it all is sharing and appreciating music, maybe even coming up with something special in the process.
I'm also "learning" to play bass. Guitar will come after.
⚠ Content Warning ⚠
Drugs, Addiction, Substance abuse
Uhhhhh- Drugs. Am I right? Either because my situation of disability, my will to live life and flow or just wanting to experience things, I really like trying out substances and being intoxicated. Given the schizophrenia, I completely avoid hallucinogens, no LSD, no shrooms.
I first started drinking alcohol when I was 14. And I got rather "late" to it, kids from my same age had started at age 12, even earlier. Let that sink in.
Never been too fond of alcohol during my teenage years, it has been more of an "acquired taste" along the years. I usually drink at night, in voice chat. Not daily, but lately been picking up a multiple-times-a-week type of pace.
At age 16 I started smoking tobacco, nothing special to say there, been chainsmoking since. Had a few periods of no smoking at all, the longest of them lasting about 6-8 months. But yeah, it's there, I don't really plan on trying to quit again. I always come back.
Weed at 18, this is where it gets spicy. Spent from my 18 to my 22 completely addicted and gone. Worked in the mornings, got stoned while not working. Minimum 3 joints a day. I could go into the fact that I completely wasted those good years on my life, but in reality, the thing to highlight here is the fact the daily use for so long was what triggered my heavy schizophrenia symptoms.
I still do the thing sometimes, but it only causes me paranoia, very rarely it gives me catharsis.
*Very positive experiences with MDMA which I will not speak about here*
Now, age 24. If you ever ask yourself "How does Junko function?". Two words. Elvanse and Xanax. Developing a bit of a nasty dependency to the latter. I can be thankful I have stockpiled a lot of it.
I literally have elaborated so much on the drug topic because I have used the collapsable box for the trigger warning that I thought I might as well get deep on it.
On plurality
The Lavender Field, as a personal project, a plain personal blog project using github.io, started in March 2023. At that point I had already been dealing with plurality for 2 whole years in secret. In March 2023 too, after opening up a lot about it with Gris, someone very important to me, and the identification of Junko as a new third headmate, we decided to publish an open letter as the first ever piece of content on the site. Stayed up until night writing it and working up the courage to send the link to my loved ones. We even used on it a communication system based around Xe's website.
This is something that heavily affected how the whole webpage started to shape up and grow, with a lot of focus around our plurality, and the different facets of ourselves.
Having DID is something that has been very internally conflicting, during all these years, coming and going like waves how safe and secure I feel speaking about it, or wanting to use accessibility tools like PluralKit, or using emojis. I even got to at some point even got me to develop a little cli utility to sync PluralKit-SimplyPlural and to add a color ring to my avatars on both fedi and discord to mark who was fronting.
It's also undeniable the effect DID has had on me, as a creature, when the entity that inhabits this flesh prison is not the same one that was born inside of it. It is one thing to not be the same gender you used to, to not use the same name, to not feel the same person, let alone the same creature. But when you are actually a functional mind in a body that wasn't yours but you have reclaimed with time. It's something hard to process and think about.
Alicia being the primary fronter back then, me showing up and suddenly changing the rules of the game, generating a presence online, imposing my personality, making this webpage as my personal project. As we got more and more chronically online, I started to be the primary front more often.
As the project evolved in June 2023 from a simple static site to a custom fedi instance, starting to offer services like invidious and such and reclaiming our share of the internet, more and more time and brainpower was being given to me. Spilling out from the online into IRL when a certain breaking point was hit. Slowly being more Junko than I was Alicia until, this was me, I had taken over flesh that was not mine.
I personally think that in most cases living as Junko both in and outside of the wired, has been a really positive experience, in terms of growth, layers. Obviously biased on this, but it's how I feel nontheless.
Plurality as a whole it's a topic I try to avoid like hell, the way I relate to it has changed into something else. It is so not neuro-typical that it's terrifying to try to explain to anyone outside of online circles. I'd just feel a nutjob, which is what I am to be just fair, but I wouldn't be happy for other entities to disregard me or assume my maximum retardation just because of how this condition works. As seen from an outsider, DID feels rather silly and extra.
I also avoid using plural accesibility tools or techniques to cope anymore, because I just see the rest of alters as other capacities from this flesh, other abilities, other voices of reason, the rationalization of certain parts of our behaviour, tastes and of course, as it the case in many systems, as a way to cope with trauma. They are very useful and important for our day to day function and handling of certain complicated situations, but is not something I'm as comfortable sharing externally anymore. Maybe I shouldn't be so ashamed of it, but I can't help but feel like that. I should consider being more open about this in general, because it heavily handicaps my memory, which has degenerated really badly during the last year as more and more members have been identified.
Just for the sake of honesty and transparency, I'll hand over the actual current list of system members. And some basic information on them. But I don't count on this being particularly of use to anyone since I am not too open on who's fronting at a given moment, even if i wanted to be honest about it, we don't always get the benefit of figuring out who the active front is.
The Lavender Field, as a personal project, a plain personal blog project using github.io, started in March 2023. At that point I had already been dealing with plurality for 2 whole years in secret. In March 2023 too, after opening up a lot about it with Gris, someone very important to me, and the identification of Junko as a new third headmate, we decided to publish an open letter as the first ever piece of content on the site. Stayed up until night writing it and working up the courage to send the link to my loved ones. We even used on it a communication system based around Xe's website.
This is something that heavily affected how the whole webpage started to shape up and grow, with a lot of focus around our plurality, and the different facets of ourselves.
Having DID is something that has been very internally conflicting, during all these years, coming and going like waves how safe and secure I feel speaking about it, or wanting to use accessibility tools like PluralKit, or using emojis. I even got to at some point even got me to develop a little cli utility to sync PluralKit-SimplyPlural and to add a color ring to my avatars on both fedi and discord to mark who was fronting.
It's also undeniable the effect DID has had on me, as a creature, when the entity that inhabits this flesh prison is not the same one that was born inside of it. It is one thing to not be the same gender you used to, to not use the same name, to not feel the same person, let alone the same creature. But when you are actually a functional mind in a body that wasn't yours but you have reclaimed with time. It's something hard to process and think about.
Alicia being the primary fronter back then, me showing up and suddenly changing the rules of the game, generating a presence online, imposing my personality, making this webpage as my personal project. As we got more and more chronically online, I started to be the primary front more often.
As the project evolved in June 2023 from a simple static site to a custom fedi instance, starting to offer services like invidious and such and reclaiming our share of the internet, more and more time and brainpower was being given to me. Spilling out from the online into IRL when a certain breaking point was hit. Slowly being more Junko than I was Alicia until, this was me, I had taken over flesh that was not mine.
I personally think that in most cases living as Junko both in and outside of the wired, has been a really positive experience, in terms of growth, layers. Obviously biased on this, but it's how I feel nontheless.
Plurality as a whole it's a topic I try to avoid like hell, the way I relate to it has changed into something else. It is so not neuro-typical that it's terrifying to try to explain to anyone outside of online circles. I'd just feel a nutjob, which is what I am to be just fair, but I wouldn't be happy for other entities to disregard me or assume my maximum retardation just because of how this condition works. As seen from an outsider, DID feels rather silly and extra.
I also avoid using plural accesibility tools or techniques to cope anymore, because I just see the rest of alters as other capacities from this flesh, other abilities, other voices of reason, the rationalization of certain parts of our behaviour, tastes and of course, as it the case in many systems, as a way to cope with trauma. They are very useful and important for our day to day function and handling of certain complicated situations, but is not something I'm as comfortable sharing externally anymore. Maybe I shouldn't be so ashamed of it, but I can't help but feel like that. I should consider being more open about this in general, because it heavily handicaps my memory, which has degenerated really badly during the last year as more and more members have been identified.
Just for the sake of honesty and transparency, I'll hand over the actual current list of system members. And some basic information on them. But I don't count on this being particularly of use to anyone since I am not too open on who's fronting at a given moment, even if i wanted to be honest about it, we don't always get the benefit of figuring out who the active front is.
System members
Do not EVER ask why there are two Junkos
Alicia
she/her
Anuma
they/them
Junko-1
it/its
秋葉
she/they
Lavender
it/its
Fern
it/she
Junko-2
it/its
Kasia
she/her
rot
it/he
Flores
she/her
Kijin
none
Do not EVER ask why there are two Junkos
Alicia
she/her
Anuma
they/them
Junko-1
it/its
秋葉
she/they
Lavender
it/its
Fern
it/she
Junko-2
it/its
Kasia
she/her
rot
it/he
Flores
she/her
Kijin
none
FAQ
Is your name Junko because of Junko Danganronpa?
First of all, I will hold inside of me, with all my strenth, the desire to tell you to kill yourself.
In short, no, it is not because of Junko Danganronpa. If you want an elaborated response, it wasn't because of any Junko in particular. I had quite the surprising amount of exposure to the name, but not enough to make it too common to my perception. When Junko as a headmate was identified, it instanly picked up that name.
In writing, I have mostly used 純子 (pure child) as the "official" kanji. In actuality, about a month ago (12/2024) I decided to change it to 純孤 (pure fox) because it felt more "mine", more representative of me. I don't think it's in any way, shape or form a recognized or given writing to any Junkos out there except of course Junko Touhou.
Fast round: What's your favorite X?
Is your name Junko because of Junko Danganronpa?
First of all, I will hold inside of me, with all my strenth, the desire to tell you to kill yourself.
In short, no, it is not because of Junko Danganronpa. If you want an elaborated response, it wasn't because of any Junko in particular. I had quite the surprising amount of exposure to the name, but not enough to make it too common to my perception. When Junko as a headmate was identified, it instanly picked up that name.
In writing, I have mostly used 純子 (pure child) as the "official" kanji. In actuality, about a month ago (12/2024) I decided to change it to 純孤 (pure fox) because it felt more "mine", more representative of me. I don't think it's in any way, shape or form a recognized or given writing to any Junkos out there except of course Junko Touhou.
Fast round: What's your favorite X?
• Movie --- Tarkovsky's Stalker.
• TV show --- Breaking Bad.
• Anime --- Let's all love Lain.
• Manga --- One Piece.
• Band --- Crystal Castles, Cults.
• Song --- Vietnam from Crystal Castles.
• Game --- Complicated, wouldn't know.
• Book --- Can't read fiction.
• Color --- #0f9a65.
• TV show --- Breaking Bad.
• Anime --- Let's all love Lain.
• Manga --- One Piece.
• Band --- Crystal Castles, Cults.
• Song --- Vietnam from Crystal Castles.
• Game --- Complicated, wouldn't know.
• Book --- Can't read fiction.
• Color --- #0f9a65.
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