The fact of the matter is that we all made some wackadoo choices during the 2020 COVID lockdown. And while you might cringe at the memory of how seriously you took learning TikTok dances, at least you didn’t almost date Andrew Cuomo. In her new book, I’ll Have What She’s Having, Chelsea Handler recounts her brief but haunting text-based flirtation with the former governor/sex pest.
Per “Page Six,” this all started with a Zoom appearance on The View, during which Handler said she would “like to be penetrated by the governor.” This was at the height of the “Cuomosexual,” when the governor was being heralded as the country’s strongest leader for going on TV every day to share hospitalization statistics (and before several former employees accused the governor of sexual misconduct). According to Handler, three days after her interview, she received a call from an unknown number and a long voice-mail from Cuomo.
“I’m going to fuck the governor,” Handler recalls exclaiming to a friend. A responsible friend would have told her to get outside and take a walk around the block, but we were all going through it, I guess. Handler planned to follow through during an upcoming trip to New York, but fate intervened when “Mr. Cuomo stopped responding to my texts as soon as I arrived on the East Coast.” A New York–based loser ghosting a woman who actually wants to meet up? Tale as old as time …
Handler continued texting the then-governor, including sending photos of her “swimming topless while wearing a face mask” and “smoking a joint topless.” Looking back, she sees their missed connection as a good thing. “My life is filled with dodging bullets,” Handler told “Page Six,” explaining that she counts her brief dalliance with Cuomo among them.
The next year, Cuomo would resign after a string of former aides accused him of sexual harassment and assault. That was already a big enough story — now imagine if he had also been dating Chelsea Handler. Would we have had to see her give a serious statement? Stand behind him at a press conference in Albany? In a way, we all dodged a bullet there.