Six Script
Cast:
Catherine of Aragon (Medium) = ?
Anne Boleyn (Easy) = Kaylee
Jane Seymour (HARD) = Sarenne Stills
Anne of Cleaves (Easy) = Addie
Catherine Howard (Medium) = ?
Catherine Parr (Hard) = Cadence
Ex Wives (required)
[CATHERINE OF ARAGON]
Divorced
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Beheaded
[JANE SEYMOUR]
Died
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
Divorced
[KATHERINE HOWARD]
Beheaded
[CATHERINE PARR]
Survived
[CATHERINE OF ARAGON, spoken]
And tonight, we are...
Live!
Listen up, let me tell you a story
A story that you think
You've heard before
We know you know our names
And our fame and our faces
Know all about the glories
And the disgraces
I'm done 'cause all this time
I've been just one word
In a stupid rhyme
So I picked up a pen and a microphone
[ALL]
History's about to get overthrown
[CATHERINE OF ARAGON]
Divorced
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Beheaded
[JANE SEYMOUR]
Died
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
Divorced
[KATHERINE HOWARD]
Beheaded
[CATHERINE PARR]
Survived
[ALL]
But just for you tonight
We're divorced, beheaded
Live!
Welcome to the show
To the historemix
Switching up the flow
As we add the prefix
Everybody knows that
We used to be six wives
Raising up the roof
Till we hit the ceiling
Get ready for the truth
That we'll be revealing
Everybody knows
That we used to be six wives
But now we're
Ex-wives
[CATHERINE OF ARAGON]
All you ever hear and read about
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Is our ex and the way it ended
[JANE SEYMOUR]
But a pair doesn't beat a royal flush
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
You're gonna find out
How we got unfriended
[KATHERINE HOWARD]
Tonight we gonna do ourselves justice
'Cause we're taking you to court
[CATHERINE PARR]
Every Tudor Rose has its thorns
And you're gonna hear 'em live: in consort
[CATHERINE OF ARAGON]
Divorced
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Beheaded
[JANE SEYMOUR]
Died
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
Divorced
[KATHERINE HOWARD]
Beheaded
[CATHERINE PARR]
Survived
[ALL]
But just for you tonight
We're divorced, beheaded
Live!
Welcome to the show
To the historemix
Switching up the flow
As we add the prefix
Everybody knows that
We used to be six wives
Dancing to the beat
Till the break of day, once
We're done, we'll start again
Like it's the Renaissance
Everybody knows
That we used to be six wives
But now we're
Ex-wives
Divorced
[CATHERINE OF ARAGON]
My name is Catherine of Aragon
Was married 24 years, I'm a paragon
Of royalty, my loyalty is to the Vatican
So if you try to dump me
You won't try that again
[ALL]
Beheaded
[ANNE BOLEYN]
I'm that Boleyn girl
And I'm up next, see
I broke England from the Church
Yeah, I'm that sexy
Why did I lose my head?
Well my sleeves may be green
But my lipstick's red!
[ALL]
Died
[JANE SEYMOUR]
Jane Seymour, the only one he truly loved
[ALL]
Rude
[JANE SEYMOUR]
When my son was newly born
I died, but I'm not what I seem
Or am I?
Stick around and you'll
Suddenly see more
[ALL]
Divorced
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
Ich bin Anna of Cleves
[ALL]
Ja
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
When he saw my portrait he was like—
[ALL]
Jaa
[ANNE OF CLEVES]
But I didn't look as good
As I did in my pic
Funny how we all discuss that
But never Henry's little—
[KATHERINE HOWARD]
Prick up your ears, I'm the Katherine
Who lost her head
[ALL]
Beheaded
[KATHERINE HOWARD]
For my promiscuity outside of wed-
Lock up your husbands
Lock up your sons
K Howard is here
And the fun's begun
[ALL]
Survived
[CATHERINE PARR]
Five down, I'm the final wife
I saw him to the end of his life
I'm the survivor, Catherine Parr
I bet you wanna know how I got this far
I said, I bet you wanna know
How we got this far
Hey!
Do you wanna know how we got this far?
Then welcome to the show
To the historemix
Switching up the flow
As we add the prefix
Everybody knows that
We used to be six wives
Get your hands up
Get this party buzzing
You want a queen Bee?
Well there's half a dozen
Everybody knows that
We used to be six wives
But now we're
Ex-wives!
One, two, three, four, five
Six!
No Way
N-n-n-n-n-n-no way
There's no way
You must agree that baby
In all the time I've been by your side
I've never lost control
No matter how many times I knew you lied
Have my golden rule
Got to keep my cool
Yeah, baby
You know she's got to keep her cool
And even though you've had your fun
Running around with some pretty young thing
And even though you've had one son
With someone who don't own a wedding ring
No matter what I heard
I didn't say a word
No, baby
You know she never said a word
I put up with your sh—
Like every single day
But now it's time to shh
And listen when I say
Woo!
You must think that I'm crazy
You wanna replace me?
Baby, there's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
If you think for a moment
I'd grant you annulment, just hold up
There's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
No way
No way
There's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
No way
No way
There's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
There's no way
So you read a Bible verse that I'm cursed
'Cause I was your brothers wife
You say it's a pity cause quoting Leviticus
I'll end up kiddy-less all my life
Well daddy weren't you there
When I gave birth to Mary?
(spoken)
Aww! Hi, baby!
Daughters are so easy to forget
You're just so full of sh—
Must think that I'm naïve
I won't back down, won't shh
And know I'll never leave
You must think that I'm crazy
You wanna replace me?
Baby, there's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
If you thought it'd be funny to
Send me to a nunnery
Honey, there's no way
No way
No way
There's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
No way
No way
There's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
There's no way
Hey!
(Woo!)
(Let's go!)
(Woo!)
(Here we go!)
You've got me down on my knees
Please tell me what you think I've done wrong
Been humble, been loyal, I've tried
To swallow my pride all along
If you can just explain
A single thing I've done to cause you pain, I'll go
(spoken)
No?
[sung]
You've got nothing to say
I'm not going away
There's no way
You must think that I'm crazy
You wanna replace me?
Baby, there's n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
You made me your wife
So I'll be queen till the end of my life
N-n-n-n-n-n-no way
No way
No way
N-n-n-n-nope n-nope n-nope no! (No way)
No! (No way)
There's n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-no way
There's no way!
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Grew up in the French court
Oui oui bonjour
Life was a chore
So
[Chorus]
She set sail
[ANNE BOLEYN]
1522 came straight to the UK
All the British dudes lame
[Chorus]
Epic fail!
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
I wanna dance and sing
[Chorus]
Politics
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Not my thing
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
But then I met the king
And soon my daddy said
"You should try and get ahead!"
He wanted me, obviously
Messaging me like every day
Couldn't be better then he sent me a letter
And who am I kidding
I was prêt à manger
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Sent a reply
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Just saying 'Hi'
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
'You're a nice guy
I'll think about it maybe
XO baby'
[Chorus]
Uh oh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Here we go
[Chorus]
You sent him kisses
[ANNE BOLEYN]
I didn't know I would move in with his missus
[Chorus]
What?!
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Get a life!
[Chorus]
You're living with his wife?
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Like, what was I meant to do?
Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said
I'm just trying to have some fun
Don't worry, don't worry
Don't lose your head
I didn't mean to hurt anyone
LOL
Say 'Oh, well!'
Or go to hell!
I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said
Don't lose your head
Three in the house
With Henry’s spouse
don’t be a grouse
Make up your mind!"
Her or me, chum
Don't wanna be some
Unwanted moat scum
Are you blind?
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Don't be bitter
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
'Cause I'm fitter
[Chorus]
Ooh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Why hasn't it hit her?
He not gonna thrill you
Somebody kill you
[Chorus]
Uh oh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Here we go
[Chorus]
Your comment went viral
[ANNE BOLEYN]
I didn't really mean it
But rumours spiral
[Chorus]
Wow Anne, way to make the country hate you!
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Mate, what was I meant to do?
Sorry, not sorry about what I said
I'm just trying to have some fun
Don't worry, don't worry
Don't lose your head
I didn't mean to hurt anyone
LOL
Say 'Oh, well!'
Or go to hell!
I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said
Don't lose your head
Tried to elope
But the Pope said 'Nope!'
Our only hope was HENRY
He got a promotion
Caused a commotion
Set in motion the C of E
[Chorus]
The rules
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Were so outdated
Us two wanted to get elated
[Chorus]
Soon
Excommunicated
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Everybody chill
It's totes God's will
[WEDDING CHIMES]
[Chorus]
Uh oh
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Here we go
[Chorus]
Is that what you said?
[ANNE BOLEYN]
And now he's going 'round like
"Off with her head!"
[Chorus]
No!
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Yeah, I'm pretty sure he means it
[Chorus]
Seems it
[ANNE BOLEYN]
What was I meant to do?
[Chorus]
What was she meant to do?
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Like, what was I meant to do?
[Chorus]
What was she meant to do?
[ANNE BOLEYN]
No, but what was I meant to do?
Sorry, not sorry about what I said
I'm just trying to have some fun
Don't worry, don't worry
Don't lose your head
I didn't mean to hurt anyone
LOL
Say 'Oh, well!'
Or go to hell!
[Chorus]
Just go to hell!
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Sorry, not sorry about what I said
[Chorus]
Sorry, not sorry about what she said
[ANNE BOLEYN]
Sorry, not sorry about what I said
Don't lose your head
[JANE SEYMOUR]
You've got a good heart
But I know it changes
A restless tide, untameable
You came my way
And I knew a storm could come too
You'd lift me high, or let me fall
But I took your hand
Promised I'd withstand
Any blaze you blew my way
'Cause something inside
It solidified
And I knew I'd always stay
You can build me up
You can tear me down
You can try but I'm unbreakable
You can do your best
But I'll stand the test
You'll find that I'm unshakeable
When the fire's burnt
When the wind has blown
When the water's dried
You'll still find stone
My heart of stone
You say we're perfect
A perfect family
You hold us close for the world to see
And when I say you're the only one I've ever loved
I mean those words truthfully
But I know, without my son
Your love could disappear
And though it isn't fair
But I don't care
'Cause my love will still be here
You can build me up
You can tear me down
You can try but I'm unbreakable
You can do your best
But I'll stand the test
You'll find that I'm unshakeable
When the fire's burnt
When the wind has blown
When the water's dried
You'll still find stone
My heart of stone
Soon I'll have to go
I'll never see him grow
But I hope my son will know
He'll never be alone
'Cause like a river runs dry
And leaves its scars behind
I'll be by your side
'Cause my love is set in stone
Yeah
[ALL]
You can build me up
You can tear me down
You can try but I'm unbreakable
You can do your best
But I'll stand the test
You'll find that I'm unshakeable
The fire's burnt
The wind has blown
The water's dried
[JANE SEYMOUR]
You'll still find stone
My heart of stone
[ALL]
You can build me up
You can tear me down
You can try but I'm unbreakable
You can do your best
But I'll stand the test
You'll find that I'm unshakeable
The fire's burnt
The wind has blown
The water's dried
[JANE SEYMOUR]
You'll still find stone
My heart of stone
