The

Navigation
Guide

By: Imani Yvonne

To my mother, Carolyn, who is a futuristic genius that I

was allowed to pick from heaven. And my sister, Shirley,

Page 1 of 75
 who is the inspiration for the voice I use to empower
others.

Min, my last boss, who predicted my success when I was

barely getting by 2 years ago & her soft ear to my
existential crisis. Also, inspirational genius business
woman, mother, and friend. Along with all of my
coworkers there. Audrey, Cheney, Angelina, Marlin,
Chrissy- I don’t know how my life journey would have
gone if I was not blessed to be around so many smart,
empowering souls.

Ms. Kenyatta, my middle school mentor. A beauty who

always reminded me what true sex appeal, confidence,
and know her worth comes from.

Mr. Ward- my middle school history teacher- I could

write a book about his cool, confident, strong demeanor &
beyond.
Page 2 of 75
 All of my best friends, friends, cousins, play cousins,
thank you for all being perfectly aligned with me. Your
value is endless.

GETTING IN ALIGNMENT WITH YOUR

TRANSFORMATION

Being independent does not excuse anyone from properly

courting you if they want your time & affection.

Being fat, trans, dark skin, disabled, non-binary does not

excuse people from cording to you if they want your time
and affection.

Page 3 of 75
 Being poor and from the hood does not excuse people
rom properly courting you if they want your time and
affection.

Being feminists, religious, or a virgin, or sex worker does

not excuse people from properly courting you if they want
your time and affection.

Being a single mom, elderly, divorced does not excuse

people from properly courting you if they want your time
and affection.

Ego and narcissism:

You’re not too intimidating at all. You are not too

intimidating for being too beautiful, too educated, to
accomplished, or too liberated.If they are not making the

Page 4 of 75
 effort then they are just lazy and find you accessible for
less work. That’s it.

Men date out of their league every day and are not
ashamed to put in the work that they need to get those
women who are out of their league. So if it is not
happening for you, it is not because you are too
intimidating, it’s actually the opposite – you are way too
accessible for way less work.

You are not someone who everybody just wants to have

sex with, you just have to develop more of a personality
and be less accessible to people. Own your Divinity and
stop just being a good time for everyone because you are
searching for acceptance on any level.

Being inexperienced in life and dating is no reason to

have little to no boundaries. You can be firm without
Page 5 of 75
 having experience. Because everybody starts from no
experience.

You do not attach all of your dreams to someone who has

just taken you out on no more than two dates. Own your
Divinity. Why should they be able to consume your
thoughts with little to no effort? Who is really the Divine
one if you build your whole entire world around them?

They are not your God. Anything that you can envision
building with that person, you can build with whoever
you decide can be a part of your life because it is your
vision. It does not end or begin with a person outside of
you. Idealizing them as the ending and beginning of your
own vision for yourself just weakens you and gives them
divinity. That is worship of another person. And that is
weak.

Page 6 of 75
 Sex is simply a physical act between two people that is
consented to. Attaching spirituality, insecurities, hyper
attachment, hyper possessiveness, and expecting
commitment for sex is in issue End it is unhealthy. No
one’s physical body is greater than yours that you are
growing into every day. Own your Divinity.

You do not need to exert femininity, exert power, or

oversell sex with you in order to achieve success. Be
yourself. Get comfortable with being yourself. It is the
easiest and best way to be successful.

If you lean towards egoism and narcissism to cope with

your issues then you are simply putting on a blindfold and
leading yourself down an unsuccessful path. You are not
dealing in hurt because you are a healer. You are not too
intimidating to be taken to a normal dinner date. You do

Page 7 of 75
 not have a divine special connection to someone who
repeatedly hurt you – that is just codependency.

Also, you are not sheep. Stop allowing yourself to take

pride in playing the role of the sheep and your own life
with everybody victimize you and you never win. This is
your life and in your full control – especially your love
life. It is up to you to make optimal decisions that will
best serve your future. At some point you have to get
tired of worshiping and idealizing every situation that
does not work out. At some point, you have to get tired of
having a emotional breakdown after not receiving a text
back or not ending and commitment with everyone that
you date. At some point, you have to choose yourself and
own your divinity. You may be confident, narcissistic, or
have the biggest ego that exists - but none of that matters
if you don’t feel like your life, time, affection, love, and
body is divine. If everyone who gets access to you for one
or two dates, which only last a few hours, gets access to
Page 8 of 75
 your undying love, affection, and even consume your
mind – then there’s no divinity of self that you believe in.
Flip that around by becoming the wolf in your life and
everybody else’s life. Become the one that people are
looking to hold onto & cherish by deciding that
everyone’s small efforts are not enough to gain all of your
love and attention. The leading key way to avoid
narcissists, sociopaths, or even just your random love
bomber who goes in come back is to deal with facts and
with tangible. Stop dealing with going along with only
excitable feelings, smoke and mirrors, and nothing
tangible.

If there is no clarity there with proof that you didn’t not

have to create yourself - they need to smoke and mirrors.
Even if you do you know the exact truth, demand clarity
of that person by not giving them access to you until they
decide to be more clear & direct. The way reason why
Page 9 of 75
 my clients they don’t run into these situations is by not
entertaining indirect or unintentional actions. This is
where millions go wrong in their love lives every day.
We accept the smoke and mirrors because it feels good in
our minds and gives us more of an excitable feeling than
demanding facts, for people to be intentional, and to not
involve ourselves in anything that does not involve tons
of clarity. It is a way that we commonly shoot ourselves
in the foot voluntarily because it feels it. But know that
that feeling will not last long Because eventually the
lights will come on in all truth will reveal themselves to
both people involved. Protect yourself from these
situations by not entertaining things it do not provide a
simple clarity. Allow their efforts to be grand and
intentional for you to even acknowledge them.

Small efforts are not enough to gain time with your body
if you are not totally happy. Small efforts are required.
Page 10 of 75
 Consistency and larger efforts gain your divinity at your
own time

We’re starting a new life now.

I believe the most powerful reprogramming I’ve come up

with is not normalizing drama in relationships on my
media. I do not endorse it & I give very clear directions
on how to prevent it. Love isn’t hard. You don’t have to
struggle or manipulate to get it either.

Helping people to understand that it is NOT normal to

wait after ghosting, dating ppl who never take you on
dates, or endorsing things such as “situationships” &
being “dickmatized” sounds so silly but it’s actually really
important to change the outcome of your future
relationships.

Page 11 of 75
 When that’s all you see with adults around you, even as
an adult, it’s hard for you to separate that from the reality
that love really isn’t that hard & you actually never have
to deal with that. It’s harder for people to understand &
accept that you DO have power over your life.

People are like well what about if you came from an

abusive family? What about the patriarchy? What about
what the media says about it being harder for ____?

That has NOTHING to do with how you can shape your

future. Decide against it.

Just like you can decide to accept a cheating ghoster back,

a narcissist, a bad friend/family, someone who used you-
you can decide that you’re NOT. You can shape your own
future by just saying that’s not gonna work for me
anymore. And there it is-your power.That’s being
autonomous.
Page 12 of 75
 This is not about being picked by “rich” men. I’m an
adult. I’m not joining my life another adult who has no
control over their life & finances. I’m also shaping my
future & making informed decisions based upon my
experiences & what I want my future to look like.

When people believe it’s all about getting money then

they fail, fall backwards, repeat the same mistakes, &
never learn. They never understood that this ain’t about
money, this is the STANDARD I set for my LIFE &
anyone who wants to be apart of it.

So no, this is not about getting some bills paid & going on
a trip. You can do those things on your own all year
around. Dating is fun but it’s also about informed decision
making. Your mindset has to be BEYOND dates, getting
a little money, a trip, and “finessing” to be able to sustain
the standard you set for your life. The standards you set
Page 13 of 75
 for yourself requires a tunnel vision for what you want
YOUR future to look like.

You cannot stay on track, keep up with me, or even

understand me if your goals are small and just desperate
for anyone to choose you. Working from the opposite will
have you crying over a text, chasing people who’s
ignoring you, and never quite dating on your level. But
when you a have a vision for yourself that is beyond a
dinner, text, trip, or a handbag then you will not allow
anyone get in your way. You won’t allow anyone to
distract you from that vision. People will understand or be
removed.

Besides-

Page 14 of 75
When you think that you are being supportive, sometimes
you are acting as a crutch.Sometimes you can literally be
enabling people by not setting boundaries for them or not
cutting them off. Some people never learn until they
receive consequences for their actions. So don’t be afraid.
And figure out if your needs are actually serving you or if
your idea of love is creating the toxicity in your life.
A lot of people are extremely bored with their lives if
drama is not involved. Whether it’s at work, in
relationships, with friends, and even social media. And
that’s from celebs to everyday people.Just like a lot of
people believe “real love” involves pain & struggle to
relate to the blues/R&B/TV/Celebs. Or they need
something to feel like they are overcoming in their human
experience. Anytime something is not working out for
me, I literally feel like it’s a boulder in my way that I’m
going to end up crushing because my goals, my vision,
and the work I have to do is beyond trivial issues that
someone tries to bring to me. They have to catch up or be
Page 15 of 75
 ran over.If more people start to realize that trivial issues
are honestly just holding you back and getting in the way
of your goals instead of being something triumphant to
overcome with random guys then they would make more
progress. So if that’s you, figure out why you define love
that way.

Sex appeal-
Everyone believes the sex appeal is the specific luck or
action that is the civic to a certain type of person, body
shape, and age in most cases. Sex appeal is simply your
individuality and being comfortable with it. That’s why
you can find plenty of people being revered in their
elderly years for still being very sexy. When I say your
individuality is your power it is all encompassing. It is
also your sexuality. Be completely comfortable with
yourself, who you are, where are you are in life, and sure
about where you’re going is the pinnacle of sex appeal.
This is exactly why males who do not have much to offer
Page 16 of 75
 or even extensive vocabularies can be deemed very
alluring to many. They don’t even have to attractive with
today’s trend of gremlins bagging goddesses, haha! But
what people don’t understand is that their sex appeal
comes from the comfortability with who they are. Their
attractiveness comes from not trying to appeal to the ideal
along with a few other sprinkles of privileges here in
there, that is the basis of it. What I find is that more Often
than not, this is not encouraged to women & femmes to
embrace themselves at where they are and work with it.
We are always told there’s something better, even for
what is considered “the best”.

So what I try to do for my plus size and non-binary clients

is to encourage them to embrace where they are fully, and
show up is the best version of it because you only have
one life and one body – there’s no reason to waste a
moment of it shrinking yourself. Embracing all parts of
you from a disabled leg, ear, fupa, and wrinkles with a
Page 17 of 75
 quiet confidence just tells people that I know I am bomb,
I’m an opportunity, an experience, and a loss to those that
miss out. And people of all creeds,genders,and sizes
LOVE IT- almost to the point of wanting to bite you. Lol,
so be careful with your glo’!

Lastly, unjust narcissism-

Something I feel like I’m constantly repeating because

people are definitely commonly narcissistic or lean to
narcissism to cope- if you are being USED & dragged
through mud by someone, they are not intimidated by
you. They are a hater that you’re giving access to. Access
to use you.

“Intimidated” is not the right word to use here. Bc

someone who is intimidated by you is literally afraid of
Page 18 of 75
 you- they’re not gonna try you. They definitely can’t
successfully use you.I feel like a lot of people don’t
realize that this is similar thinking to abused victims or
people who survived harsh realities. They tell themselves
“It’s because I’m a healer/Goddess/spiritual empath”. “I
had to go through this to grow”. It’s the same exact
thing.You cannot make any real moves if you’re giving
yourself names & accolades for dealing with something
like that bc you’re gonna keep falling into the same
situations bc you’re blinding yourself out of narcissism to
be okay with it. If you’re a goddess, make them prove it
to you.

How are you giving money to a man that hates on you?

How are you going out with someone who’s literally
trashing you? It’s instant gratification of saying you have
someone, even if they hate you- that’s not what’s up sis.
Block them. And let’s get on with our lives.

Page 19 of 75
 If they are intimidated by you bc you are too “powerful”,
“brilliant”, “intimidating”, “independent” then you should
be too smart to be used! This is why this never makes
sense. This is also important because... WAKE UP- be
honest with yourself. How are you having sex with a
HATER? Also, I don’t believe people when they say this
because it’s very easy to call someone intimidating and
dress them as this monster to place blame on instead of
just saying “I was a hater drinking the finest haterade”.
Don’t listen to these people. They have an agenda.

This very important. Because when you are not clear &
happy with yourself then you are literally susceptible to
fall for ANYTHING with these guys. That’s how so many
who refer to themselves as empaths, intimidating, healers
are PLAYED, DAILY. Require receipts.

Page 20 of 75
 Confidence is essential but it is only a tool. Self respect
comes first. When you have a high level of self-respect,
then you have boundaries. When you have boundaries,
then you have standards. When you have standards do
you know what works and what doesn’t that work for you
and spend less time trying to force things that do not work
for you. Our bodies change constantly throughout our
lifetime so no matter what your gender is. Not every
second of our lives are we going to be 100% confident
and exactly how we look. That does not mean that we are
supposed to accept less or what doesn’t work for us. Not
only are we lying to you to our potential partners, but we
are lying to ourselves about what does work for us. And
when you lie to yourself about what makes you happy
then you only can play yourself.

You don’t have to be 100% confident in your body but

you do have to respect it. What I meant by that is by
setting strict standards & boundaries for those who want
Page 21 of 75
 to get close to you. When you let someone disrespect
you, they are crossing a boundary and you are playing
yourself. This is why it’s important to say the bottom line
of what’s expected. Whether it’s dinner dates, money or
financial support, emotional security, events and traveling
together, or words of affirmation- Be clear, then be FIRM.

I’m sure you are here because you know what you want
and I’m here to help you achieve. You’ll see that it’s
actually really simple. It’s just about having strict
standards & not dealing with what you don’t have
to(which is most things)- that’s setting boundaries. This
is why so many people fail themselves because they
believe that lesser boundaries equal to greater success.
And I am here to tell you that that is completely & utterly
wrong. That is actually very useless and makes absolutely
no sense whatsoever. If you do not set boundaries for
yourself then how do you or the other person know what
standard to meet for your company. How do you know
Page 22 of 75
 how to uphold that standard? How do you know how to
communicate exactly what makes you happy and what
does not work for you.? Now, these boundaries are things
that you learn through trial and error throughout your
relationships from early childhood up into adulthood and
within your career, family relationships, friendships,
acquaintances, sexual relationships, and finally committed
relationships. This is exactly why I say eliminate the word
situationships from your vocabulary. It does not mean
anything but that we have let someone across multiple
lines with us with no accountability. It is simply us being
way too friendly with our boundaries, time, and existence.
You deserve better than that. You can set a new standard
for your life and relationships.We are constantly making
decisions based upon what we expect and what we accept
for the people around us. By the time that you are reading
this then I am pretty sure that you already know what
does and does not work for you.You just need some

Page 23 of 75
 clarity and some guidance on how to solidify receiving
those things towards your best life.

There is so much more ahead of you.

The first step is always keeping yourself in better places

to meet better men or people. That means changing places
that you shop, you have drinks at, or even take a quick
bite. No, it does not have to always be upscale because
you can meet potentials anywhere but it does increase
your chances of meeting better people and better places.
It’s simple math. If you go to hole in the wall places all
the time then you are going to have higher chances of
meeting and having relations with those types of guys. I
already know that you are beautiful and educated so
there's no reason why you shouldn't be putting yourself in
the best of the best places at all times. Just looking your
best when you are going out because this communicate
Page 24 of 75
 the level of self-confidence, and that you know that you
are a showstopper. This also sends out a message to the
men in that area that you're obviously used to a certain
caliber of treatment for yourself and expect that from
other people.

Dating apps:
Remember you can use every single app that you post
yourself on to find potential partners just to date. It's all
about how you promote yourself online & offline. You
need to look like you are dressed well and going to nice
events often, so you can match with people of that
lifestyle. You also want to do that because when people
see that you dress well and take pride in your image, they
see that you they associate a certain lifestyle with you
whether you are online or offline. You want all
showstopper photos so that they don’t even think twice
about swiping to the next person or think twice about
Page 25 of 75
 taking you to a really nice upscale restaurant for the first
date. You want to be dressed like you are already at
upscale restaurants, charity events, and trips all the time.
That way, when people stop and look at your photos they
already know what to expect & what to offer you.This
makes it easier for you because you have to spend less
time explaining your expectations because they will just
look at you and see it.

-ONE GREAT SELFIE

This is very important because you want to show that you
are flawless upfront and confident in your flawlessness
whatever you look like. A great selfie with a great
lighting and a little editing to make it look professional
like it was done by photographer can really grab eyes of
everyone who passes it and create grab peoples attention.
Yes, you need photos without heavy filtering. They don’t
really go over well with guys who have something going
Page 26 of 75
 for them because generally they will have more
professional photos. You don’t need professional photos
by photographer but they need to look pristine.

-2-3 SHOWSTOPPER PHOTOS

These are the photos when you are dressed up like you are
going to a charity, any event, or just on a night out. These
photos are very important to your success. These photos
communicate the types of places that you like to go and
should be invited to, that you take pride in how you dress
and be an elegant, and that they should know to only
approach you with the best that they can offer. You
definitely want to stand out in the crowd because
remember you are a simple picture in a few words along
with thousands of other people that we are all swiping
through. So put yourself in the top spot by being a
headliner.

Page 27 of 75
 -ONE TRAVEL PHOTO
Travel photos are essential because it communicates
lifestyle. Lifestyle is important to who you are connecting
with. It also communicates with type of travel or you are.
So if you have exciting travel photos such as bungee
jumping, then those people who are interested in those
things will connect with you. If you have travel photos
that are you on the beach, then people who love to go on
luxurious vacays will look to match with you. If you are
someone who has hiking and camping photos, then people
who are interested in those things will definitely want to
match with you. It’s all about looking for a key things that
you are interested in in another person to meet and see if
you guys mesh well. Or the simple way that I like to put it
“like attracts like”.

Remember, If you do not upload photos where you have a

great background or are looking your best with your hair
Page 28 of 75
done, your make up done, and a great dress on and then it
will be to your own detriment and you will waste a lot of
time not making any progress. The photos can have a
clean background such is a white wall or something in
your home or they can be pictures of you at a park,
restaurant, or museum with a great background.

WHAT YOUR BIO SHOULD LOOK LIKE:

The bio is only a sprinkle on top of a giant cake. The cake
has to be luxurious the bio gives a short description of
what type of cake they will be indulging. And you want to
make sure that you are concise, complementary, and cute!
You do not want to talk too much in your bio and writing
entire book because no one is going to read it. Also, it
comes off as over selling yourself like you are lacking and
want to prove that you are worth dating. You don’t need
to over explain yourself in your life. The things that they
want to learn about you, they should speak to you and
Page 29 of 75
 book dates to get to know you to find out. Remember we
are concise, complementary, and cute!

Education:
Mention your highest level of education first, if it’s past
high school.
So, in the words of Kanye, we live in a society. People do
care about your rank or pedigree when they have access to
these types of accessories where they can judge people by
a photo & a few words. That’s why it’s important that you
want to step up, be your best, or just get out of the game
all together. You can cry your tears over there. I don’t
want to hear about it. So put this first because this will
keep them reading even further. If you do not have
education past high school, then you would just jump into
what type of work or specialized hobby that you have. If
you don’t have one then, you need to get one right now.
Close the book and figure out your life, first.

Page 30 of 75
 Career:
This will be the second line of your short bio. You will
not mention exactly where you work because remember
that people are in sane and you are sharing this
information about yourself with hundreds of thousands of
people. So you can give them an overview of what type of
work you do. If you are involved in sex work of any kind,
you want to leave this out of your bio. Because how you
make your money from other people, has nothing to do
with your love life. You also do not want people matching
with you because they think you’re rich, to insult you, or
make empty promises to you. You are a PERSON. Work
is work. Your social life & love life doesn’t have to be the
business of thousands of people swiping past you.

Hobbies:
Hobbies are very important. This tells how you hone your
skills, use your free time, if you’re ambitious, if you’re a
talented, and if you have a life. No one wants to hang out
Page 31 of 75
 with someone doing nothing, unless they are doing
nothing too. Which means, if they are interested in you
because you have no hobbies, it’s because they have
nothing planned for you, too. If you have nothing planned
for yourself, then people will have nothing planned for
you. This can be a few things that are thrown in there very
simply in the next sentence is separated by a commas.

Travel:
Mentioning places you travel to can be very important to
an avid reader who cares about vacationing also. It tells
them what type of traveler you are, what kinds of things
you are into, communicates your salary level or higher,
and what types of dates that you may be open to - just like
your travel photos.

Example

Page 32 of 75
 “I have my Master’s in Neuroscience & I currently work
as a researcher. I am a self-starter who loves to
experience what life has to offer. I’ve been zip lining
through the Congo, petting dolphins by the beach in
Paraguay, and riding elephants through India. When I’m
home, you can catch me at a yoga class or relaxing at
home with a good book. I love people who are motivated,
love to read, and love to go out.”

That’s it. Having photos that match what you were talking
about in your bio is a big plus but not absolutely
necessary. And if you take a look over the bio, I included
my education, work, exotic travel that I’ve done to show
what types of things I am interested in, that I am active &
healthy, and what types of people I’m looking to connect
with without give specific or private information. This is
EXTREMELY important that you aren’t putting out
private information to thousands of people. Also, notice
how I did not put that I was looking for a relationship or
Page 33 of 75
 specify any type of commitment that I am looking for in
the bio. Because why would you do that? You are
matching with thousands of people that you have no idea
about. There is no way that you will know that you are
looking for relationship with them before you even speak
to them. Also, putting that you are looking for a
relationship in your bio or saying it on a first date reads as
desperation. It does not read as someone who knows what
they want. When you say things like that you have now
open the door for everyone who comes your way to
believe that you are looking at them like they are the
absolute one for you before they have even tried to prove
anything to you or court you properly. You do not want
that for yourself because they will grow lazy before they
even start.

FOR DATING APPS

Page 34 of 75
Just have fun with swiping. You are responding slowly to
these people. Anything between and 2-24 hours is okay
because you’re a busy woman and they need to impress
you and ask you on a date, if they want more attention.
I also do not recommend exceeding spending about 4
days a week shopping through dating apps. Because
remember, these are the same people that you will meet
on the street but you’re interacting with them at a faster
rate. It can get very frustrating if you’re spending too
much time entertaining them. Plus you’re too fine to
respond on time! Let the anticipation build. In the
beginning, anticipation is always your friend.

BEGINNING:
All you need to do is say hello, how are you, or maybe
even a compliment to get the conversation going. Asking
them a question or mentioning something interesting from
their bio all is always received well. It is great if you look
great, but if you cannot hold up a conversation or start one
Page 35 of 75
 then you will be wasting a lot of time not getting to any
first or second date.No one wants to date someone who
cannot keep up a conversation- it doesn’t matter how
attractive you are. Remember that you are opening the
door for them to lead when dealing with dating apps, if
you message first. From there, they should bounce off of
you pretty well. If they don’t, swipe to the next person!

If the guy is interested he'll start asking about what work

you do and tell you when he'll be free soon. That's not
asking you out on a date.
When they asked that, just say “what do you have in mind
because I think I have some free time coming up.“

I suggest turning the first date down anyway bc you want

to show them that you are NOT on their time, ever. And,
some people like to make last-minute plans because they
believe it they can just make people drop everything and
meet them. You will not be those people. You are not
Page 36 of 75
 someone who is a fly-by-night, last-minute option. Don’t
allow random people on apps or in person to treat you that
way.

PLANNING A DATE:
Let him plan the date but turn down the first date he
offers. When you go about turning down the date what
you want to do is almost politely tell them that you have
better things to do that night.

Say something along the lines of “That sounds amazing

but unfortunately I can’t do that night. I will be free
*insert later date here*”
Or another way to answer that is “I already have plans
that night but maybe we can set something up at later
date”

Page 37 of 75
 Not only does this put you in control of the situation, but
it makes them anxious to see you because you’re making
them wait a little bit. This is a way of indirectly telling
them that you don’t care that they are looking to spend
money on you to get you out. Remember, in the
beginning, anticipation is your friend.

He will be confused but intrigued by this. Set up a better

date that works FOR YOU- that is what you want. You're
officially in after that!

Remember that some people are using dating apps to try

to collect the numbers without having to do the work of
going up to talk to people in person. They also think that
they can collect a lot of numbers without having to take
anyone on dates. You will not be that one who falls for it.

Men who ask why are you on a *dating* app, the obvious
answer is to find people to date. They only ask that
Page 38 of 75
 because, again, they want to see if you’ll say something
desperate like “looking for a relationship”.

-You are on dating apps for “fun, dating, meeting new

people”.

 You are not looking for a relationship because you

don’t know them well enough.

 LATE responses because you aren’t on their time

until they make plans.

 If they want to see you, they should ask the proper

questions.

 If you don’t like what they are saying or they are

boring, don’t respond. They get the point and will

Page 39 of 75
 come back better/more impressive or leave you alone
to talk to better options.

PRO-TIPS
TIME:
Your time is valuable and you are an important person
with great things to accomplish in your life time. You do
not take longer than 3 to 4 days to communicate with an
individual about a date. They can schedule a date within
the first 24 hours of speaking to you but you do not
extend it longer than four days. You are not looking for
random connections with people on the Internet. You also
don’t want to build at this time with them so that they
believe that you are going to invest a lot of time and
emotion with them before you even meet them or they get
Page 40 of 75
 a chance to impress you. This is very important when
communicating boundaries. If they cannot figure out
their lives enough to plan something within 3 to 4 days
time of talking to you, then you will just deem that a
missed connection and move onto the next person who
has it more together and has decided on you. You do not
wait for random people to decide when they are going to
make the move with you. You are on a dating app to meet
people for days. You are talking to people and meeting
people in person so that they can take you out on a date to
get to know you more intimately in person. You are not
looking for or entertaining random feign interest.

DO NOT GIVE OUT YOUR NUMBER:

Do NOT give out your number until they have a date with
a specific time & place set. Just say “I prefer to trade
numbers after meeting. We can trade Instagram or
Snapchat”. Usually people who are great people have no
issue with this because it is the same messaging system.
Page 41 of 75
 You guys can communicate just as fast and effectively.
The only difference is them having access to you outside
of the app without ever meeting you first. And you do not
want to run into stranger danger where they have your
private info and are now calling and texting you from
1000 different numbers. That is an extreme case scenario
but it does happen often. You also want them to work a
little bit harder to impress you in order to get your number
so that they can contact you whenever they want. You do
not want to just freely give out your number to random
strangers because then you will have a lot of missed
connections and random conversations with numbers that
won’t matter in the next three weeks or so. This cuts
down on a lot of time wasting for you and both you guys
get to see how serious you are about meeting before you
guys are communicating sporadically or consistently via
text.

SOCIAL MEDIA:
Page 42 of 75
 If they do decide to accept being a follower on Instagram
then they have just failed their test. Because in that
moment they could’ve already asked you on a date. But
they chose to use that opportunity to get your social media
because they could not get your number. What I find is
most people who offered to be a follower of your social
media are not looking to ask you on a date, just fake feign
interest until you give in and settle for something cheap.
Don’t follow them back.

CONFIRMING PLANS:
If somebody asked you on a date they have until 11:30
AM of the day of the date to confirm plans. By 2 PM, you
will have other plans. No, you will not message them
1000 times asking for updates. No you will not call them.
They remember the plans that they have just made with
you a day or two ago. If they do not remember than that is
somebody who does not have their life in order and you

Page 43 of 75
should not be looking to move forward with them because
they are forgetful person.

If they told you a date but did not tell you a place, then
you would ask them can you confirm the place that we are
meeting? Or you will message them and say can you
confirm the time that we are meeting? Make sure you are
doing this at least 18 hours before the date. You do not
want to do this the day of the dates because you don’t
want to be quietly waiting with loose plans up in the air.

BIG PROMISES:
Be careful people who offer things upfront whether you
are on apps, the Internet, or in person. Because they do
that to see how fast they can reel you in and get you
excited about them and then never actually follow
through. It’s like promising someone a diamond ring to
make them fall for you first so they’ll forget about the
Page 44 of 75
ring. Then they never have to give it to you. This goes for
people who are offering things such as booking a trip
together within the first few messages, offering to buy
you new dresses and shoes, or offering large sums of
money and have never spoken to you before. It’s similar
to love bombing. If someone offers to book a flight
together and you are just talking to this person then you
can test them by telling them that you aren’t comfortable
with traveling with people you do not know and you
would need to be emailed the itinerary after meeting them
for a few dates, first. This lets them know that you are not
getting a big declarations with no back up and that they
have to actually put in effort to impress you.

NO CALL, NO SHOW:
Also, you do not wait on a stranger from an app or that
you met in person or chase after them to plan a simple
Page 45 of 75
dinner. You can go out to dinner by yourself or with other
people that you actually know.My clients favorite thing to
do is to go out to a bar, dinner, or either alone or with
friends with an activity or drinks. If you are not a drinker
then you can definitely attend a class, go to a museum, go
to a pop up shop. You can even sit at home, light candles,
and read a book. You do not chase after a random stranger
who made plans with you. Waiting on them or chasing
them down for a simple dates will never work out in your
favor, especially in the long run. If people know that they
can get you this emotional about something as simple as
not showing up for plans then they already feel like you
have a weakness for them and they will take it vantage of
it by doing it over and over again to you. Do not open that
door. But also don’t try to entertain them and be cool
about it because it really is a character flaw and again
they will take it vantage of you and keep doing it to you.

Page 46 of 75
 You want to try to be around more upscale places and
focus on going to those upscale places when you are out.
Not all but some. Try to find areas with a mix of upscale
restaurants, bars, and nightclubs with a mix of chain
restaurants, lower in bars, and maybe even a mall or hotel.
The Dupont Circle area of DC is the perfect example for
this. If you live further out in the places that are
considered more suburban or by the countryside, then
malls and places where a lot of people convene for fun is
where you want to be to have some fun and meet people.
If you are someone who is busy and spend a lot of time
doing business & flying, your best bet is airport
restaurants/bars, social hotels like The Moxy, a business
event, music festivals, and shows. You do want to
maximize all options and avenues this is why I say you
need to prepare yourself with having good photos for your
dating apps because going out can be more misses than
Page 47 of 75
 hits depending on how you are looking and what you are
doing when you’re going out.In my experience, it’s
always a hit because I’m normally in very busy areas
when I go out. You cannot avoid them if you are living in
DC or you are working in DC. The only time I have
experience there being a mess is if you were making eye
contact with people who are looking your way for more
than five seconds.

When you go out:

All you have to do is focus on you having a great time.

NO WEIRD EYE CONTACT OR STARING
CONTESTS! Not looking for any attention. Something
that I noticed is that a lot of people read someone looking
around a lot as someone who is begging for people to buy
them a drink or begging for someone to talk to you.
People read this as someone who needs a friend. You do
not want to be that person. You want to be the one who is
Page 48 of 75
 looking glamorous, enjoying themselves, and having a
great time whether you are with friends or alone. They
will approach you.

When they approach you, you can remain disinterested

and skeptical. If they are not offering to buy you a drink
within 2-5 minutes of conversation then you can just
politely say “I have to go” or “I’m sorry you are
interrupting my time out right now. I’m not interested.”

They understand what this means. And if they are serious

about having an opportunity to take you out and not just
trying to talk a random person’s ear off because they are
drunk, then they will make the move of offering you a
drink or asking when you are free to go out on a date
soon.

People who are interested in you will:

- Approach you
Page 49 of 75
 - Ask how you are doing/make a joke
- Ask what you are drinking and if you would like
another(you can say yes or no, it’s up to you)
- They will try to keep up good conversation and tell you
where they work or what they do
- Ask when you are going to be free soon( YOU will say
I’m not sure what my schedule looks like)
- They will ask for your number. You will ask do they
have Instagram or an email because you are not keen on
giving strangers your number.

Getting their Instagram or email is important because it

gives you a peak into their real life and see what they are
up to. It also gives you the opportunity to see if what they
told you is true. A lot of people are trying to collect
numbers to try to wear you down later. This is why it’s so
important not to give out your number. Because people
will act interested like they have all the plans to do would
you require and then get your number and just
Page 50 of 75
 procrastinate long enough for you to give in on a night of
weakness. It sounds sick but it’s very common. Avoid this
by setting the boundary by instagram or email. The point
is that going to social spots and events just increases your
chances of meeting people who have specific careers and
incomes. Also, applies to the meeting potential business
partners who can turn into close acquaintances, or people
in your industry. But it’s not absolutely imperative that
you go out alone and treat yourself all the time. Now, it
will greatly increase your chances but it’s not absolutely
imperative because men are going to approach you
anywhere that you go whether you are alone or in a group
if they are interested. Lastly, the reason why you may not
be getting approached because they can tell that you
aren’t that confident in yourself when you go out- you
said “no one pays attention to me”- and believe me
people can sense that off of an individual without you
even communicating with them. Our bodies
communicative-the way we dress, even the way that we
Page 51 of 75
 look at other people. Human interaction is so very fragile
and people can pick up on 1 million things about in
seconds of meeting you. So make every second count.

DRINK DATES:
Everyone has this misconception that drink dates are
cheap and low effort but they are honestly great for you
and can work to your benefit. You definitely want to
make sure they are booking places better than three star
restaurants to meet up for drinks. Places with nice
cocktails and a wine list that is more extensive than your
normal Cabernet, Pinot Grigio, and Moscato is ideal. If
you do not feel comfortable drinking with people on a
first date, do not know your limit, or do you not drink
then it is advisable that you tell them that you do not
drink. You can tell them later that you just did not know
them that well to drink with them on the first date. It will
be fine.

Page 52 of 75
 Also, drinks are fine because if it’s going well, they will
want to go to another place for food. I just don’t
recommend taking the five dollar dates like coffee and fro
yo. But drinks are just fine.

You do not have to stay long on dates that are just for
drinks. I would give them no longer than 1.5-2hrs, 2-3
drinks max. After that, you will say “I have other plans
tonight and I have to go.” That way, if they wants to make
sure that you schedule more time for them, then they will
have to plan out an elaborate date the next time. And if
you two do you hit it off, then they most likely will take
you out to dinner that night or on your 2nd date. But use
this time in between your short drink date and the next
date to build up that anticipation. You do not want to be
texting back really fast or committing your time to them
before they impress you just to get a dinner date. It is not
a good look for you and you might not get that second
date. You also won’t want them to believe that they
Page 53 of 75
 already have you and you like them so much that they
don’t need to plan a more elaborate date. Again,
remember, anticipation is your friend.

DATE NIGHT:
Don’t stress etiquette too much besides the basics of not
talking with your mouth full. I know in the want to be
“fake call girl without being a call girl” era, everyone
likes to stress etiquette. It’s good that you know it for
yourself but it’s not absolutely imperative that you are
showing all of that you know what types of forks to use
unless you are having a dinner with the president and
prime minister, and even then they may be too busy
talking about themselves to care. The only people that
absolutely might care about this is a pretentious fool who
really doesn’t have much planned for you and wanted
something to judge you about.

Page 54 of 75
 When they confirm the place, time, and reservations with
you, you want to google the menu just to pick your faves
so you look like you go to these places often, if you do
not already. If they are asking you on a date, then they
are looking to pay for the date. So there’s no need to
worry about that. If they are beating around the bush and
making you do a lot of planning about the place, time, and
day – then they are communicating with you that they
want you to pay for either both of you or your half
because it’s essentially your idea. Be careful of these
types. It’s not hard to say “what are you doing Saturday at
4pm? I would like to take you or meet to La Vie at 4 for
dinner/drinks.”

You don’t want to get the most expensive thing because it

will come off like you’ve never been anywhere before.
Most times, they’ll be fine with it. But, this is more about
self image. The mid-range prices are the best. Definitely
don’t go for the cheapest because you have standards.
Page 55 of 75
 TALKING POINTS:
Here are some questions you can ask them to
communicate your standards, make them think, & too see
what kind of person they are:

 “What kind of romantic are you? Are you the

romantic type that surprises people with money &
flowers or more of a friend type?”

 “What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done

with or for a woman?”

This question is here because it is another filter. I love my

filters. Most times, if someone wants to impress you and
wants to have the number one spot on your roster then
they will say yes, appreciate you being upfront and honest
about what you were looking for. If he is not looking to
Page 56 of 75
impress you and does not have much to offer, then he will
stumble on this question or simply tell you “No”. That is a
super red flag right there. No person who hasn’t made it
to the age of 21 should have any experience being
romantic or treating someone special or have no idea what
it looks like. We all live on the same earth. My sister
received teddy bears and tons of gifts while she was 15
years old from boys who saved up their allowance and
wanted to show her that she was special with a part of it. I
was taking on my first date at 15 by a guy who actually
did some yard work, saved up his money just to take me
to the movies and out to eat, after I met his mother to
show me how serious he was about his crush. Romance is
not lost out on teenagers.

So if they have no experience being romantic then that’s

already tell you that you are starting from below zero and
will have to train someone who is never gotten into the
mode of treating someone that they were with as a special
Page 57 of 75
 person in their life. That’s not only going to be tough for
you, but it also shows bad character development. You
are also adding the end, where you are calling them a
friend, because in my belief, the only person I should be
close to you then never treat you special is a distant
friend. And that’s just me being nice. Even with my
distant male friends they are nice and respectful to me.

 “I am the adventurous type. If I’m spending my time

with someone then I expect they are excited to build
memories with me. Spending time doing nothing
together is a waste of life. Are you the adventurous
type?”

This is as it says – you are not trying to waste years

breathing on each other, doing nothing, and building no
memories. You both deserve the opportunity to spend
time with people who want to do things together and
Page 58 of 75
 experience life together. If they are not looking for that,
then they are not the type for the person that is reading
this book. If they are looking for simply television, sex,
and pizza on the couch for the years that you guys are
going to spend together, if you are successful, then you
will let them know that that is not what you were looking
for.

 “I want to let you know upfront that I do you like a

person who does things to make me feel special. It’s
a big turn on for me. I was kind of spoiled in my last
relationship and I just want to put that out there.”

Tell them how it is! Tell them that you do not want to be
with someone who expects sex, meals, and tons of your
time that is contributing nothing to your life. It’s a turn off
and it makes you better. You could be spending tons of
time alone or dating multiple people who will add to your
life and not dedicated to one person who requires that you
Page 59 of 75
 ask nothing of them. This is especially for older women
who have not learned how to vocalize their needs. It is
time that you turn that around and started being serious
with people about what you need. And to be honest, it’s a
waste of your time and their time and you are both lying
to yourself about what is will make you happy in this
kinship.

Everything else that you would talk about on a date

should be very light conversation for the first one to two
dates. We are not going deep in the past about our history
with our exes because it’s over now and has nothing to do
with this new experience with this new person. That has
nothing to do with the new opportunities and abundance
that you all are going to bring into each other’s lives. It
has nothing to do with the love that is going to grow from
this learning experience that will be you coupling. Not
texting back immediately( 2-36 hours) is a win because
you want them to wonder about you, know you’re busy or
Page 60 of 75
unavailable, & have options. Be SPORADIC with it. You
have your own life and other options ahead of you. You
are now sitting by the phone waiting and on a text from a
guy that took you on one date.

You will not discuss relationships and marriage on the

first two dates. I actually don’t recommend you bringing
it up at all. I believe you communicate that with removing
yourself slowly if you don’t see it happening. You should
not have all of your eggs in one basket after three dates
because this is a fail for you. Allowing them to get too
cozy too soon will result in a lazy partner early on. This is
the issue that so many people run into. They always
wonder what happened and this is the answer. If you do
not see this person moving in the direction that you are
going and then you keep going in the direction that you
are going in with other people, you do not wait for them
Page 61 of 75
to choose you. When they see you moving on your own in
a direction of other people, then I’m sure that a serious
person will make a turnaround I understand that they have
to solidify things with you or except a loss. This is why
it’s very important not to dedicate a lot of your time to
someone BEFORE committing. Don’t wait to be chosen.

SECOND, THIRD, AND DATES BEYOND

So, the next date you’ll get to relax even more bc the
pressure is ON for them to win a further opportunity with
YOU. They’re definitely going to pull out a few stops to
seal the deal. If this person really liked you from the first
date or two, they will start asking the real questions and
I’m here to prepare you.

The most important questions they will normally ask:

Are you looking for a relationship?

Page 62 of 75
  You: I’m just getting out here to see where things go.

Even if you are not just getting out there, LIE. You’re
dating history and pitfalls in the none of their business
because it has nothing to do with them. It’s also not useful
information that they need for anything that’s going to
happen between you two in the future. It’s really just
someone prodding in your business where they don’t need
to be. But you can’t blame people for trying, right?

 How many people are you dating?

You: Dating multiple people is time consuming. I’ve met

a few people but I’m really focused on my
work/studies/school.

This is just another question to prod into your business.

Again, you need to lie. You also want to redirect the

Page 63 of 75
conversation on things that are actually important such as
career, life goals, and what you have planned for the
future. Not past failures with other people that they have
never met before in their life and are never going to meet.
Also, this date is about you. It’s not about the people
you’ve dated.

 What happened in your last relationship?

You: We just grew apart. We became different people. So

we went our separate ways. No hard feelings.

No, you do not need to trauma bond with them like they
are some type of magical therapist that’s going to solve all
of your issues over dinner and wine. No, you do not need
to spill yourself all over the table. It will not gain their
affection. It will not make you closer to them. You have
just essentially told a random person that you need a
Page 64 of 75
 therapist. You do not want to do that. Also, bad talking
exes is always in bad taste when you’re meeting someone
new. You do not want to leave a bad taste in their mouth
about you or of the situations that you have dealt with. It’s
also not on them to deal with you after you have told them
all of your issues that you have. So, give a vague answer
and redirect the conversation because they don’t need to
know that information. Everyone is just trying to enjoy
their time out together.

If they are prodding you for this type of information then

you can politely let them know that they are asking a lot
of personal questions that are making you uncomfortable.
You don’t know if they are going to use this information
against you in the future, judging you, or going to share
that information with friends or the Internet. So, you do
not want to take the risk of seeing a long thread about
your information on Twitter or a meme on instagram

Page 65 of 75
talking about you because you trusted a stranger with that
information. Save yourself.

SEX, SEX, SEX

My golden rule for sex is it to not go by time but to
measure their effort. This means that if they are not
putting enough well rounded effort in, then they will
never have sex with me. This is also effective for my
virgin, celebrate, A sexual, abstinent, and religious clients
who are waiting for marriage.

The reason why I do not measure by time is because you

can choose to waste a lot of time with a person who never
put any amount of effort in is showing you feign interest
and believing that that entitles them to sex with you
because you have allowed them to build up along rapport
with you- do not do this.

Page 66 of 75
 Also, sex is something that is consensual between
individuals, not something that’s earned over a time of
knowing someone especially if they do not care to meet
any of your standards or expectations.

CAREER PEOPLE OF ANY SORT

Do not go on a date and brag about your success believing
that you are going to intimidate them or position yourself
to be top priority. It will not be read this way. They will
believe that you are insinuating that you’re very generous
with your money and you will come off like a sugar
daddy. Think of it as a man who has a lot of money
bragging about his career. You would assume the same
thing about him. You can discuss the brands and the
people you may work with. You can even talk about the
sector that you work in but you do not need to tell
positions, specific place of employment. People will go
online and research how much money you make and then
calculate how much you have. The only people that this
Page 67 of 75
does not apply to you is doctors, lawyers, and well known
judges. Just because of your schedules, people that may
know you, and the type of work you do you can be very
telling from the general description. Plus these types of
people normally go for people that are in the same field.
So it does not matter for you. But if you are a sex worker,
exotic dancer, model, influencer,, well-paid author,
entrepreneur, and any type of business then you do not
want to tell your specific information. Keep the
information that you are giving out at a minimum. Plus
you should not want to intimidate your partners because it
will never have a positive reaction. You should be looking
to bond with people that you have common interest with.
You also want to make sure they like you for you and I
which you can possibly do for them in the future.

Page 68 of 75
 BREAKUPS
When something doesn’t work out, it’s for your greatest
good. Your life is of perfect design. As long as you are
moving forward and living your life, things will always
fall together. No one person exiting your life can ruin
your entire life. You will always have chances. You
always have opportunities. You will always have
abundance. I have learned many things from the people I
have dated. And while some were shorter times than
others, the greatest lesson that I learned is that better was
always ahead. No matter how much I wanted to attach
myself to some idealistic outcome, there was always a
greater outcome that I could not even imagine ahead of
me. What I want you to take from that is, that you will
have such a long life with tons of grand experiences if
that is the expectation you set for yourself.

Page 69 of 75
Remember that you are the greatness and nobody can take
that from you by removing themselves. So don’t put that
label on them. Whatever you envisioned with having with
them, you can create with whoever you choose because it
is your vision. Nobody can take that away from you so
nobody is special enough to be irreplaceable.

Don’t attach your abundance, opportunities, and chances

to one person but YOU. Remember that you are the only
one for you, and everyone else in your life is only an
invite on this journey of growing into yourself.

We never stop growing.

We never stop getting new opportunities.
We never stop experiencing happiness, romance, and
success.

Your entire human experience is not based on one person

exiting your life because you are more grand than that.
Page 70 of 75
 And most times people are being forced out of your life
because they are holding you back from your true
potential. And that is a sign to focus on which you should
be working on, instead of gaining them back. So many of
us women and femmes spend our entire lives focusing on
all of our potential, trading for, going to school for,
working out for, dressing for only being lovers that are
chosen. Only being a server. Only being a provider. Many
of us don’t know dreams that don’t involve being a server
or a provider of some sort and a partnership as being the
greatest purpose of our existence.Your existence is much
more opulent & expansive than a person. It’s much more
expansive than servitude. Heartbreak, disappointment,
and sadness is a part of human experience but it does not
have to be your entire life. It won’t be because you will
change it by declaring a new standard, right now. Living
is much too complex and unpredictable for temporary
sadness to be the end of it. Embrace sadness because we
would not be human without experiencing it. Use that
Page 71 of 75
 sadness as a bookmark for a path we are not going to go
back down, things we are not going to do again, and
people we are not going to allow allowed back into our
lives. Remember that sadness and know that he has ended
with your new standard for life & love. You have much to
live for and great things to accomplish and add to even
passerby’s lives that you probably won’t even remember-
that is the beauty of living. We are all sharing and
connecting at extremely fast rates on a daily basis and
adding things, value, experiences, lessons, visions, and
memories to peoples lives at all times. You are worth
experiencing and you are worth living a fulfilling
experience. Give yourself that opportunity everyday.

FORGIVENESS
In my book, forgiveness of disrespect in any form or
fashion is most certainly overrated and unnecessary. But
forgiving yourself for the mistakes that you have made,
will make, and pitfalls that you may have is very
Page 72 of 75
important. It’s important to know that on the other side of
any downfalls that you have, you have your own
forgiveness waiting there and it’s unconditional because it
comes from YOU- no one can take that away. Forgiving
yourself breeds progress. Because when you forgive
yourself, you give yourself another chance to do better.
You open a new door for yourself just like that. You can
open 1000 doors for yourself by just saying that it’s OK
because I’m going to do better next time. It’s OK because
I’m going to get what I require Because I deserve it & this
is the new standard I am setting for my life. I forgive
myself for allowing things that the new me will not except
because I have set a new standard for my own life that
must remain. I am no longer working hard for love,
respect, and affection, but I’m allowing no less than that.

Page 73 of 75
 LOVE
Love is peaceful, transformative, empowering, and it does
not lack in any areas. It is real well-rounded, protective,
generous, and gentle. Love is not a struggle, pain,
expecting nothing of your partner in them expecting
everything of you. It’s not draining nor is it
overwhelming. It is just light that shines through you
because it’s all around you generously giving to you and
receiving from you. I’ve received tons of questions about
if I’ve ever experienced real love, and the answer is YES.
I cannot generate this level of prosperity for myself and
tons of people around the world that I have never met
before if I was working from a place of greed and loss of
love. The love that I have received throughout my life
through partnerships, friendships, and even with my
following is how I understand the world. This guide was
Page 74 of 75
 created through a lens of experiencing and generating
constant love my entire life, now there is a way for you to
join that path and experience the same exact love or better
starting here with this guide. Love is self respect and
respect of your space. Respect of your boundaries, your
standards, and the totality of your existence. We’re ending
here with love. Dream your existence to be bigger and
commit to that- watch everything around you fall in line.

Page 75 of 75