English Screening Test
Name: Hannah Archihon
Section I: Essay analysis
Given below are the assignment given to the student and his essay in response to that. Go
through both carefully and then answer the two questions placed below the essay.
Assignment
Write a paragraph about a work or school-related experience where you came across a conflict
and had to resolve it. Which skills did you use to resolve the situation?
Student’s Essay
That day I was at school but was very worried about my little dog Fifi. Fifi was my life, and last
night I had found her bleeding a little from her privates. I had cleaned her and set her on her bed
with some cotton below her for the night. But today morning, after I walked her and fed her, she
seemed okay I had settled her on her bed while going to school. Still, somehow, I couldn’t
concentrate on my school work my mind kept going back to Fifi the whole day. Finally when I
got home I rushed to her room and opened the door to see her passed out on her bed, when I saw
her my heart literally dropped because I thought she was dead. I picked her up to see that she was
still breathing but as I picked her up I could hear her cry and I broke out in tears. I tried helping
her stand up and to drink water but she only fell over, she was super weak. After she fell over I
picked her up and called my mom, I don’t think I have ever yelled at my mom so bad but it was
an emergency.
Minutes had passed and my mom finally drove up and we rushed Fifi to the emergency vet
hospital which was only like five minutes away thankfully. The whole time in the car I tried to
stay calm as she was in my arms, I keep trying to talk to her. Once we walk into the vet they
want to take her from me and I swear I don’t want to let her go because I don’t know what would
happen next.
Write your brief analysis of the essay in terms of focus/main idea, contents, and
organization.
Taking into consideration that the given instruction was to cite the skills that he
utilized in order to resolve a conflict that is school-related, I believe that he failed to put
emphasis on the skill itself but rather focused on his personal feelings and how the situation
affected him. The goal was to present a concrete resolution for a certain school/work-related
dilemma but as I analyzed the content, he put so much focus on how his favorite dog got sick
—which is rather a personal problem than a school-related one. Even though he wrote that he
couldn’t concentrate on his school because he kept worrying, that wouldn’t compensate for
the lack of elaboration. The major problem of this essay in terms of message is that the writer
failed to really understand what the instruction says. Keywords are work/school-related
situation and skills.
2. Write your brief analysis of the grammar, structures, and words used in the
essay. (Please do not provide a list of errors and their corrections.)
This essay was written in a simple “introduction-climax-resolution” structure. In the most
basic sense, nothing could go wrong in this type of paragraph structure. The problem is, it really
is basic. And for me, an essay of someone’s personal story could do a lot better. Considering that
this was written in a first person point-of-view, it shouldn’t be so hard to convey the writer’s
feelings. Truthfully, he did manage to deliver his sad feelings through the use of words like, “my
heart literally dropped”. But going back to the goal of the essay, it should also be about the
resolution and how he utilized his skills. His selection of words caused the essay’s underlying
tone to be of sadness until the very end.
Section V: Writing
Write a short essay of 250 words on the following topic.
My Most Memorable Experience
If someone would tell my eight year-old movie fanatic self that ten years later, she would be
maneuvering her very own digital camera—shooting scenarios and directing actors, she never
would’ve believed it.
I am a fan of movies—a huge fan at that. You see, I spent my early years living in a really
small island in the Philippine archipelago. Sure, living in an island has its perks—fresh air and a
lot of green things. But even as a kid, I’ve always felt that my dreams and imaginations are
bounded by the coasts of my little island. My ultimate dream was to travel around the world.
And the closest I got into achieving that dream was through movies. That’s when I decided that I
want to work in the movie-making industry someday.
Imagine the bliss that I felt when in my junior year in college, I had the opportunity to make a
film. One of my favorite locations was this really beautiful river. I was holding the camera and I
had to do a birds-eye-view shot so I climbed up a huge rock to position myself. I had a good look
at the entire view and I was overwhelmed by a realization: I’ve come a long way. It probably
wasn’t a big deal—just a course requirement to pass the semester. But for me, it was a solid
proof that I am finally one step closer to achieving the dream I had ever since I was a kid.
