1. What is legal writing?

It is the discipline governing the written aspect of

practice of law. It covers the manner, style and form of
writing legal articles, correspondence, opinions, paper
and more importantly, court-bound documents such as
pleadings composed of petitions or complaints, answer,
reply, rejoinder, affidavits, counter-affidavits, as well as
motions, memorandum and position papers that are all
filed in court. It includes orders, decisions, judgments,
awards of courts, administrative bodies or arbitral
tribunals.

In a real sense, legal writing is a sort of presentation.

The lawyer should be able to make a convincing
presentation of his case in the limited time that he is able
to hold his reader's attention. To succeed in this, the
lawyer needs diligent pre-work in the preparation of a
good write-up of the required paper or pleading.

2. What is good writing?

It entails clarity, conciseness, and correctness. It

also includes simplicity and persuasiveness. It entails
avoidance of legalese, verbosity and redundancy, as well
as adjustment of language and style like the terms or
wordings used, and approach and delivery of the subject
or topic depending on the purpose and target audience
which could be preparing a brief for a client, legal guide
or inspirational talk to high school students or pleadings
for the court.

a. Clarity - means presenting fact or information

clearly leaving no doubt on the mind of the reader. For
example, say things in exact number or amount instead of
“many” or “several”. Organize facts in chronological
order. Use numbering for each paragraph for easy
reference. Be plain meaning by observing the use of
familiar and concrete words. Also, avoid wide gaps
between subject, verb and object by minimizing on
modifiers, especially “nested modifiers” which modify
the modifiers, and misplaced or dangling modifiers.
Putting modifiers between the subject and verb or
between the verb and object makes for tedious writing.

b. Conciseness – means to be succinct, brief or

straight to the point. Avoid verbosity and lengthy
statements. Make use of paragraphs, sub-paragraphs, sub-
headings to arrange your work as well as guide the
reader's eye. Write just enough by striking a balance
between too little and too much.

c. Correctness – the statements you write must

represent the truth which are verifiable and validated by
competent sources such as the constitution, laws,
jurisprudence, customs and traditions, recognized
authorities and experts, published books and treatises by
known authors in the legal profession, science-based data,
testimonies of competent witnesses, among others.

d. Simplicity – means to write plainly and simply

by observing the rules on “economy of expression.”
Wordy expressions, convoluted words, word-
constructions and needless words must be avoided. This
is best done by preferring shorter sentences, choosing
shorter words, minimizing the use of connectives and
relative pronouns. Repetition or tautology and
elaborating on the obvious must also be avoided as much
as possible.
 e. Persuasiveness – is the ability to use any of the
four modes of legal reasoning, namely: 1) rule-based
reasoning; 2) analogical and counter-analogical
reasoning; 3) policy-based reasoning; and 4) the narrative
reasoning to influence the deciding authority to adopt an
idea or course of action in favor of one's client.
1) rule-based reasoning – the conclusion is reached
by analyzing and applying the law, rule or legal principle.

2) analogical and counter-analogical reasoning –

There are three (3) types of this kind of argument:

i. Arguing from precedent – showing similarities

between the case decided by the Supreme Court and the
case of the client. This is usually achieved by invoking
the doctrine of stare decisis.

ii. Argument of same legal application – if a law

applies to one area, it may also be understood to apply to
other similar areas. Mutatis mutandis is an example. It
happens when one compares multiple situtions having
multiple variables where some variables remain constant,
while others are allowed to be changed.

iii.1 Argument using common sense analogy

-analogical arguments may be used by starting with
something that everyone accepts.

iii.2 Counter-analogical reasoning – concludes by

pointing out relevant differences between the case and the
client's facts. This usually debunks the opponent's use of
analogical reasoning.

3. Policy-based reasoning – reaches a conclusion by

connecting the facts of the case to the state's existing
public policy or a company's private policy.

Narrative reasoning – conclusion by telling a story

that shows the context, description and perspective that
appeals to commonly-held ideas of justice, mercy or
fairness.

3. What is a legal dispute?

There is legal dispute when one party complains of a

violation of his right by another who, on the other hand,
denies such violation. Stated differently, a legal dispute
involves a violation of a right protected by law or which
violation the law punishes.

4. What is the significance of legal dispute in legal

writing?

A failure to correctly identify the legal dispute

together with its principal and sub-issues, if any, and
address them properly would cause the writer to argue in
an illogical or off-tangent manner. As a rule, the legal
dispute, when recast or reworded in the format of an
issue, provides the principal issue in every case. For
example, an apartment owner's claim that the tenant has
violated his right under the contract by not paying the
required rent, and the tenant's denial of the claim can be
recast in the format of an issue, to wit: “whether or not
the tenant violated the lease by not paying the rent.”

5. Importance of the principal and sub-issues.

It is important because the writer weighs the

significance of every argument that he wants to use to
persuade the reader by its relevance to such issues. Any
argument that does not touch base or relate with the issues
would be quite useless and a waste of time.

6. Two stages of legal writing (Pre-work and Write-

up)

1. Pre-work. This is the beginning of the writing

assignment and it involves at least five levels (see a-e
below) of efforts:

a. Establishing where the legal dispute lies in the

case.

This is the key to pre-work. Only when you have an

idea of what the principal issue is, could you make a good
job of extracting the relevant facts from your case
materials. There is a need to go over the materials very
quickly and determine preliminarily the principal issue or
issues involved in the case. It is only when you know the
principal issue or at least have a preliminary idea of what
is about that you could do a correct job of making a
summary of the facts of your case.

b. Discovering its relevant facts.

There are two ways to quickly study case materials.

One way is to make short random notes of the facts of the
case that you consider important as you over them.
However, the notes are often uncorrelated. They do not
give a complete picture of the terrain of the case.

The other way is by summarizing. You can best

understand and absorb written materials when you
summarize their contents. It compels you to assess the
importance or significance of an item of fact to the legal
dispute and decide whether to keep it or throw it out of
your summary. This affords the writer the opportunity to
get rid of irrelevant facts and putting in order the events
in the order of their occurrence. When the sequence of
the events are in disarray, with subsequent events told
ahead of preceding ones or with frequent flashbacks to
the past as the story unfolds, you are likely to get
confused by the cluttered facts that are likely out of
context or detached from their immediately surrounding
circumstances.

c. Knowing the Constitution, laws, rules,

jurisprudence, policies, customs and traditions, treatises
and works of known authors that apply to it.

This involves searching for the specific authorities

that will either help or burden you in prosecuting or
defending your side of the dispute based on the facts of
the case.

d. Identifying the relevant issue or multiple

issues with or without subordinating or sub-issues that
you would address

Issues are usually identified when contending parties

do not agree on certain matters in a given case. Only
issues that when resolved determine the outcome of the
legal dispute are relevant to the case.

i. Factual issue -an issue is factual when the

contending parties cannot agree that a thing exists or has
actually happened.
 ii. Legal Issue – an issue is legal when the contending
parties assume a thing exists or has actually happened but
disagree on its legal significance or effect on their rights.

iii Subordinate controlling issue – an issue the

resolution of which would invariably resolve the principal
issue. For example, the principal issue of whether or not
the tenant has violated the lease agreement by way of
unpaid rentals may depend on the subordinate issue of
whether or not the rents may be deemed paid by set off
of the lessor’s separate debt to the tenant.

iv Threshold issue – issues that should be resolved

before any consideration of the main legal dispute or
merit of the case is done. For example, issues on lack of
jurisdiction, prescription or venue are resolved first before
the court takes cognizance of the merit of the case.

e. Roughing out (simply, rough draft of) the

arguments that you would use.

The next step is to plan and rough out a balanced

approach to your arguments on the issues before writing
them up. In crafting your arguments you need to be
guided by your THESIS STATEMENT or
PROPOSITION.

A good argument should consider the structure of a

balanced thesis presentation per issue raised identified.
First, a clear statement of your thesis or where you stand
on the issue to be resolved must be made. For example, X
raped (or did not rape) Y. This is written down at the top
of the draft paper

Second, the argument that can be made against your

position but with an explanation that those arguments do
not doom such position. For example, Z witnessed the
rape incident. This is written down just below your thesis
and on the left side of the draft paper.

Third, the arguments in favor of your position are

conceptualized. For example, Z was in another place
during the rape incident or Z is nearly blind. This is
written down opposite or just below the particular
argument against your position to enable more analysis of
the arguments.

Fourth, an appeal to the good sense of the person or

persons who will resolve the issue/s is made. For
example, X’s good moral reputation, or rendering
judgment in favor of accused in the light of equipoise
rule, or lack of credibility of witnesses. This is usually
stated in the conclusion or epilogue of the draft pleading.

Anatomy of a legal argument –An argument is a reason

you offer to prove your thesis presentation ( your thesis
statement of proposition). It is based upon a combination
of the right rule and the right fact. For example, in the
thesis or proposition that “ X should be punished for
crossing the red light,” the statement “crossing the red
light is punishable by law” would be the rule (also known
as rule statement), while the statement “X crossed the red
light” would constitute the fact (also known as case fact
statement) Finally, a conclusion (also known s
conclusion statement) can be made that “X should be
punished by law.”

Note: A rule statement contains a key fact. In the above

example, “crossing the red light” is the key fact. When
this key fact component is present in the case fact
statement, a positive match occurs, and such rule applies
to the case fact. Of course, the rule refers to the various
provisions of the constitution, laws, regulations,
jurisprudence, rules of court, principles and doctrines of
law, etc.

Tip - After doing the rough draft of the arguments and

after making sure that all the data and inputs needed for
the case have been thoroughly researched on, try creative
thinking by taking a time out and enjoying some
relaxation. Most often, with the issues and arguments
still fresh on your mind, answers will suddenly pop up to
your doubts and unanswered questions. Be prepared to
note them down at once.

2. Write-up.

This involves preparation of the paper, motion or

pleading to be filed or submitted. It normally includes the
following: a) Statement of the Case, b) Statement of Facts
(stating the plaintiff’s and defendant’s version.), c) the
Issue or Issues involved, Arguments raised (with separate
heading), d) the Discussion on the arguments (with each
argument raised discussed separately and preceded by a
sub-heading of the particular argument placed on the left
side of the paper), and e) the Relief sought (usually
preceded by a “Prayer”).

Grammar and Style:

1. Passive Voice

The active voice is more effective than the passive

voice. The active voice is simpler, clearer, shorter, and
more direct. In passive sentences, the format is object,
verb, subject. Active sentences follow a different format:
subject, verb, object. Example: “The attorney faxed the
summary-judgment motion.” If the structure is object,
verb, subject, then it’s a “single passive.” A sign your
sentence has a single passive is if you see the word “by.”
Example: “The summary-judgment motion was faxed by
the attorney.” Use single passives to connect sentences or
end a sentence with emphasis. A double passive, also
known as a blank or nonagentive passive, hides the
subject. Example: “The summary-judgment motion was
faxed.” In that example, the reader doesn’t know who
faxed the motion. When you omit the subject, the actor is
unknown. The passive voice conceals information, is
vague, and places emphasis wrongly. Write in the active
voice unless you’re using the double passive deliberately
to emphasize the object rather than the verb or you don’t
know or care who the subject is.

Exercises: Passive Voice

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. The jurors were asked about their professional

history.
A. This sentence contains a blank passive. We don’t
know who asked the jurors about their professional
history. Corrected version: The attorneys asked the
jurors about their professional history.

2. After the jury deliberated for 10 days, defendant

Rosen was found not guilty.
A. The sentence doesn’t state who found the defendant
not guilty. Corrected version: After the jurors
deliberated for 10 days, they found defendant Rosen
not guilty.
3. The decision was written by Judge Packer.
A. This sentence contains a single passive. It’s written
in object, verb, subject formation. Corrected
version: Judge Packer wrote the decision.

2. Negative

Sentences written in the negative might appear

acceptable, and there’s nothing grammatically incorrect
with them. But they aren’t preferred. It’s always better to
write in the positive. It looks and sounds better, and it’s
easier to understand. Avoid negative prefixes or suffixes
“dis,” “ex,” “ill,” “ir,” “-less,” “mis,” “un,” and “non.”
Eliminate negative combinations: “never unless,” “none
unless,” “not ever,” and “rarely ever.” Negative words to
exclude from your writing include “barely,” “except,”
“hardly,” “neither,” “not,” “never,” “nor”, “provided
that,” and “unless.”

Exercises: Negative

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. An opening statement won’t be convincing unless it’s

given with a smile.
A. This sentence contains a negative word “unless,”
which frames it as a negative sentence. Corrected
version: An opening statement will be convincing if
it’s given with a smile. Better version: An opening
statement given with a smile is convincing.

2. Most cases rarely even go to trial.

A. This sentence contains a negative combination,
 “rarely ever,” that you should stay away from.
Corrected version: Most cases settle before trial.

3. Not only did John run away from the police, but he
also hid.
A. This sentence contains a negative word: “not.”
Corrected version: John ran away and hid from the
police.

3. Metadiscourse

Metadiscourse is writing about your writing. A

phrase like “for all intents and purposes” is
metadiscourse; it takes up space without adding anything
substantive. Omit these phrases. Other examples of
metadiscourse: “the fact of the matter is,” “it is submitted
that,” and “as a matter of fact.”

Exercises: Metadiscourse

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. It is well settled that the defendant knew what she

was doing before she stabbed the victim.
A. The phrase “it is well settled that” adds no meaning
to the sentence. Corrected version: The defendant
knew what she was doing before she stabbed the
victim.

2. The judge told the jury, “It should not be forgotten

that court is ending early today.”
A. The phrase “it should not be forgotten” is
metadiscourse. It occupies space while not adding
anything. Corrected version: The judge told the
 jurors, “Court is ending early today.”

3. Please be advised that cellphone use is prohibited.

A. This sentence contains the phrase “please be advised
that,” an example of metadiscourse. Corrected
version: Cellphone use is prohibited.

4. Gender Neutrality

Gender neutrality in writing is a relatively new, and

important, phenomenon. Not only is sexist writing
offensive, but it focuses the reader on style rather than
content. There’re four ways to rephrase gendered
language. The first is to use plural forms, which allow
you to replace “he” and “she” with “they.” Example: “If
he doesn’t appear in court, the trial will still go forward.”
Becomes “If they don’t appear in court, the trial will still
go forward.” The second is to eliminate the pronoun,;
that might require you to rearrange the sentence.
Example: “He who isn’t a morning person should find a
different line for work.” The third is to repeat the noun.
Example: “A court officer will escort you to the jury
room. The officer will do so once all the jurors are
assembled.” The fourth is to use a second-person
pronoun like “you,” “your,” or “yours.” Example: “She
who has patience should work in Family Court.”
Becomes “If you have patience, you should work in
Family Court.”

Another way to be gender neutral is to use “person”

rather than “man” and “woman.” Rather than using
“policeman,” “chairman,” “mailman,” “stewardess,” and
“fireman,” use “police officer,” “chair,” “letter carrier,”
“flight attendant,” and “firefighter”.” If you see the
suffices “-man,” or “-ess,” delete them. If you see
masculine terms using the word “man,” delete them. Use
“one” to make the sentence gender neutral. Example:
“To boldly go where no one has gone before.” Use
gender-neutral parallel language: If you use “man,” use
“woman.” If you use “husband,” use “wife.” Make your
subject agree with their predicates. Avoid the inelegant
“he or she,” “s/he,” or alternating between “he” and
“she.”

Exercises: Gender Neutrality

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. New Jersey is New York’s sister state.

A. Use gender-neutral terms. Unless someone is really a
sister or brother, replace “sister” or “brother” with
“sibling.” Corrected version: New Jersey is New
York’s sibling state.

2. A judge can’t be biased. She must be impartial.

A. This sentence isn’t gender neutral. It uses the female
pronoun. Making the noun plural is one way to make
the sentence gender neutral. Corrected version:
Judges can’t be biased. They must be impartial.
Better version: A judge can’t be biased. A judge
must be impartial.

3. Madam Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has been a

United States Supreme Court Associate Justice since
1993.
A. This sentence isn’t gender neutral. It uses a term
reserved for a female. Eliminate “Madam.”
Corrected version: Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has
 been a United States Supreme Court Associate
Justice since 1993.

5. Nominalizations

A nominalization occurs when an added suffix turns a

verb into a noun. Your writing shouldn’t have any
nominalizations. They’re wordy and abstract. Use a
strong verb rather than a noun. You want your sentence
to show action. Example: “The court reached the
decision that . . .” becomes “The court decided that . . . . “
Avoid buried verbs that end with these suffixes: “-tion,”
“-sion,” “-ment,” “-ance,” and “-ity.” A “be” – very
attached to a clause that ends in a proportion should be
eleiminated. Example: “Be in attendance becomes
“attend.”

Exercises: Nominalizations

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. The intern provided assistance to the attorney.

A. The nominalization is “assistance.” Choose the
strong verb “assist.” Corrected version: The intern
assisted (or, better, helped) the attorney.

2. The committee members said they’ll take my

application into consideration.
A. The nominalization is “consideration.” Choose the
strong verb “consider.” Corrected version: The
committee members said they’d consider my
application.

3. The eyewitness provided an identification of the

 defendant.
A. The nominalization is “identification.” Choose the
strong verb “identify.” Corrected version: The
eyewitness identified the defendant.

6. Legalese

Writing in legalese is a poor form of writing. Not

only are legalisms confusing, but they also have meanings
you don’t fully grasp. Write in place English using
simple and common Anglo-Saxon words. Writing in
plain English is formal and proper; avoid conversational
English. Eliminate words like “aforementioned,”
“henceforth,” “hereinabove,” “whereby,” and “said.” If
you aren’t sure whether a word is legalese, ask yourself
whether you’d say it in a formal speech. Because writing
is planned, formal speech, you shouldn’t write it if you
wouldn’t say it. Use legal terms only when necessary for
terms of art or words that can’t be translated into plan
English.

Exercises: Legalese

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. Interns may dress casually on Fridays, as per the

Judge.
A. “As per the Judge” can be eliminated. Corrected
version: Interns may dress casually on Fridays.

2. The aforementioned parties are currently in court.

A. Two words in this sentence should be eliminated:
“aforementioned” and “currently.” Both are
unnecessary and wordy. Corrected version: The
 parties are in court.

3. Henceforth, no water bottles are allowed in the

courtroom.
A. You wouldn’t use “henceforth” in a formal speech, so
don’t write it. Corrected version: No water bottles
are allowed in the courtroom.

7. Cowardly Qualifiers

Eliminate doubtful, hedged, timid, and misleading

phrases and words: “apparently,” “as far as I’m
concerned,” “basically,” “practically,” “it might be said,”
“it seems,” “more or less,” “nearly,” and “somewhat.”
Don’t combine letters and numbers. Example: “four
(4).” Eliminate cowardly expressions: “at or near,” “on
or about,” and “on or before.” These expressions should
be used only when writing a complaint and the exact
places or times are unknown. When discussing an
exception to a rule rather than the rule, use “generally,”
“typically,” and “usually.” Example: “Generally, we only
allow customers to use the restrooms. But your
emergency situation is an exception.”

Exercises: Cowardly Qualifiers

Rewrite the following sentences. You might have to add

words to make the sentence readable.

1. The defendant probably pleaded guilty solely

because his attorney told him to plead guilty.
A. Eliminate “probably” to avoid uncertainty.
Corrected version: The defendant pleaded guilty
solely because his attorney told him to plead guilty.
2. Apparently, the owner of the store threatened to shoot
the teenager if the teenager didn’t leave the premises.
A. Get rid of “apparently.” Corrected version: The
owner of the store threatened to shoot the teenager if
the teenager didn’t leave the premises.

3. The accident occurred at or near the intersection of

Union Turnpike and Springfield Boulevard.
A. “At or near” is a cowardly expression. Eliminate it;
the exact place of the accident is known. Corrected
version: The accident occurred at the intersection of
Union Turnpike and Springfield Boulevard.

8. Modifiers

Modifiers are words, phrases, or clauses that act as

adjectives or adverbs. Modifiers should point clearly to
the words they modify. Modifiers can be misplaced,
squinting, or dangling. Place modifiers next to the words
they modify.

Misplaced modifiers are placed too far from the word

or words they modify. Misreadings arise when phrases or
words are misplaced. Example: “I went to a lawyer with
legal problems.” By writing the sentence this way, the
reader will believe that the lawyer, not you, has legal
problems.

A squinting modifier can refer to the word before it or

the word after it. But a modifier should modify only one
word. Place these modifiers right before or right after the
words they modify. Placing the modifiers elsewhere will
allow for a meaning different from what you intended
Example: “A modifier should only modify one word.”
Becomes “A modifier should modify only one word”
because we want to place emphasize on “one word.”
Squinting modifiers include “almost,” “also,” “even,”
“exactly,” “hardly,” “just,” “merely,” “nearly,” “scarcely,”
“simply,” “solely.”

Dangling modifiers (dangling participle phrases) fail

to refer logically to any word in the sentence. Example:
“Though only 18, the judge found the young defendant
guilty on all charges.” This sentence suggests that the
judge is only 18 years old. You have two ways to fix
dangling modifiers: (1) include the subject of the
sentence; or (2) turn the modifier into a word group and
include the subject. Corrected version: “Although the
defendant was only 18, the judge found him guilty on all
charges.” Dangling participles describe something left
out of a sentence. Example: “Writing carefully, dangling
participles must be avoided.” This phrase dangles; it
doesn’t answer who writes carefully or who must avoid
dangling participles. Corrected version: “To write
carefully, one must avoid dangling participles.” To fix
dangling participles, identify who’s doing what to whom
to point out clearly the subject and avoid double passives.

Exercises: Modifiers

1. Answer questions can be difficult during cross-

examination.
A. Repositioning “during cross-examination” is
essential to avoid misplacing modifiers. Corrected
version: Answering questions during cross-
examination can be difficult.

2. The defendant only pleaded guilty to two charges,

not them all.
A. This sentence is ambiguous. “Only” is a squinting
modifier. In this case, it limits the word “two” and
should be placed right before it. Corrected version:
The defendant pleaded guilty only to two charges,
not them all.

3. Jurors are vigilantly encouraged to read through

documents.
A. The word “vigilantly” should be placed next to the
word “documents.” “Vigilantly” describes how the
documents should be read. Corrected version:
Jurors are encouraged to read documents vigilantly.

9. Wordiness

Short sentences are read and understood more easily

than long ones. And many legal documents are
unnecessarily wordy. Writer’s use of the word of is a
main contributor to wordiness. When possible, invert or
rearrange a sentence to delete of.

Some tips:

Delete and, if necessary, replace as of.

Delete of after “all” and “both,” except when
followed by a pronoun.
Delete of after “alongside,” “inside,” “off,” and
“outside.”
Delete of in dates and years.
Revise sentences to remove of abstractions, such
as “factor of,” “kind of,” “matter of,” “sort of,”
“state of,” and “type of.”
Use “except for” to replace “outside of.”
 In addition, remove redundant words and phrases
(example: “In some instances” becomes “Sometimes”)
and substitute one word for a wordy prepositional phrase
(example: “the editing of articles” becomes “editing
articles”). To write more crisply, write in the active voice,
and avoid nominalizations and legalese.

Exercises: Wordiness

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. The Supreme Court of the State of New York has

subject-matter jurisdiction over this case.
A. The word of is unnecessary in this sentence.
Eliminate it. Corrected version: The New York
State Supreme Court has subject-matter jurisdiction
over this case.

2. The attorney hasn’t filed the motion as of yet.

A. As of creates unnecessary wordiness. Eliminate it.
Corrected version: The attorney hasn’t filed the
motion yet.

3. He’s the type of witness who’d lie under oath.

A. The words “is the type of witness who” are
superfluous. Delete them. Corrected version: He’d
lie under oath.

10. That vs. Which vs. Who vs. Whom

Which word you choose between that and which

affects how your readers will understand the sentence.
That is restrictive (defining); which is non-restrictive
(non-defining). Defining clauses provide essential
information that is important for the sentence; non-
defining clauses introduce nonessential information. If
the word or concept following that or which is one of
several, use that. If the word or concept expresses a
totality, use which. Which should be surrounded by a
comma, whereas that shouldn’t have commas around it.

Use that as a structural device to aid understanding.

Example: “The People alleged defendant committed
murder.” Becomes: “The People alleged that defendant
committed murder.” In this sentence, adding that aids
understanding because “The People” can’t alleged a
defendant.

Eliminate the nonstructural that. Example: “The

advice that he gave to the class is not to be wordy.”
Becomes: “The advice he gave to the class is not to be
wordy.”

Use that to distinguish between direct and indirect

discourse. Direct discourse: “The senior partner said,
‘Bill researched the issues.’” Always eliminate the extra
that. Example: The court attorney explained that
although she will only draft the decision, that no one will
read it.” Becomes: “The court attorney explained that
although she will only draft the decision, no one will read
it.” Replace “that that” with “that this” or “that the.”

Differentiate between that (or which) and who. That

and which refer to things, entities, concepts and animals.
Who refers to people and to named animals and animals
that have special qualities. Who and whoever are used to
refer to subjects and subject complements, whereas whom
and whomever are used to represent objects. To choose
the correct pronounce, isolate the subordinate clause and
then decide how the pronoun functions within it. Who
occasionally functions as a subject complement in a
subordinate clause. Subject complements occur within
the linking verbs am, are, be, been, being, and is.

Exercises: That vs. Which vs. Who vs. Whom

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. M&G is the law firm who represents the defendant.

A. Because the sentence is about which law firm
represents the defendant, the name of the law firm
representing the defendant is essential information.
Corrected version: M&G is the law firm that
represents the defendant.

2. The law clerk gave the judge the relevant law, which
was meant to help the judge decide the motion.
A. Because this sentence implies that the law clerk gave
the judge only the relevant law, this sentence is a
defining clause. Use that. Corrected version: The
law clerk gave the judge the relevant law that was
meant to help the judge decide the motion. Or,
better, delete “that was meant”: The law clerk gave
the judge the relevant law to help the judge decide
the motion.

3. It’s uncomfortable to sit on a chair which doesn’t

have a cushion.
A. Because the subject of this sentence is one type of
chair, it’s restrictive, which means we should use that
instead of which. Corrected version: It’s
uncomfortable to sit on a chair that doesn’t have a
cushion.
10. Professional Tone

When writing, you get to choose which tone you’ll

use. This decision is important because your tone is what
evokes emotion and reaction from your readers. Because
legal writing is formal, avoid casual, impertinent, and
joking tones. Keep your sentences short. Short sentences
are businesslike and to the point. To avoid seeming
biased, use objective language whenever possible. When
conveying thoughts on a matter or person, remember that
a true statement needn’t contain disparaging or otherwise
offensive language. Avoid biased modifiers and
conclusions. Don’t tell; show. Don’t just write
something. Set out the facts that show why you’re right.
Cut your adjectives and adverts. Understate; never
exaggerate.

Exercises: Professional Tone

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. An employee who’s running late should at least call

to let his manager know he’ll be late.
A. This sentence lacks tact. Correct it. Make the
sentence gender neutral. Corrected version:
Employees should notify their manager if they’re
going to be late.

2. The prosecutor’s motion should be denied. His

argument is based on a preposterous claim.
A. Calling the argument “preposterous” is unnecessarily
disparaging and will lead to reader push-back. Think
twice before using biased conclusions.
3. The lawyer was very rude to the judge.
A. This sentence contains disparaging language.
Explain what made the lawyer come across as rude.
Corrected version: The lawyer interrupted the judge
several times during the oral arguments. And cut
“very.”

11. Absolutes and Adverbial Excesses

Avoid using absolutes like always or never. These

words are rarely accurate. Avoid adverbial excesses, too.
Legal writers often use words like certainly, clearly, and
undoubtedly in place of a strong argument. Why is a
statement clear? What makes a statement
incontrovertible? If you have answers to these two
questions, you should explain them. Although concision
is key, don’t use an adverbial excess to save words. If
you don’t explain yourself thoroughly, your readers will
begin to doubt the strength of your arguments and the
veracity of y our claims.

Exercises: Absolutes and Adverbial Excesses

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. When Mr. Robinson was arrested for possession, he

said that he was “just holding it for a friend” – which
is ridiculous; that’s never the truth.
A. The unedited sentence contained both a disparaging
word (“ridiculous”) and an absolute word (“never”).
Remove both. Corrected version: When Mr.
Robinson was arrested for possession, he said he was
“just holding it for a friend.”
2. Ms. Williams is a drug addict. As you know, Your
Honor, drug addicts always lie about their drug
habits.
A. It’s inaccurate to say that drug addicts “always” lie
about their drug habits. Rephrase the sentence.
Corrected version: Ms. Williams is a drug addict.
AS you know, Your Honor, she might not be entirely
forthcoming about her drug habits.

3. The complaint is obviously ridiculous.

A. Calling a complaint “obviously ridiculous” is rude.
Write that the complaint “lacks merit” or is
“unfounded” instead. Then explain why it lacks
merit or is unfounded. Corrected version: The
complaint is unfounded because of X, Y, and Z.

12. Specificity

Concision is key, but legal writers should never

sacrifice specificity for brevity. In legal writing,
specificity is more important than concision. Just as
ambiguity in a contract benefits the party that didn’t draft
the contract, ambiguity in legal writing benefits
adversaries. The law is precise; there should be no room
for possible misinterpretations or misunderstandings. Be
precise. Repeat sentence subject if you must. When in
doubt, specify. Don’t use vague pronouns or referents
like it unless the pronoun or referent refers to one thing
only. Choose the words that convey the precise meaning
you intend. Settle for nothing less than accuracy, clarity,
and precision. Here are some tips to do this:
 Use adjectives to clarify nouns, especially if the noun
can refer to more than one person, place, or thing.
Use demonstrative adjectives (that, these, such, etc.)
instead of articles (the).
Remove unnecessary qualifiers from your sentences.

Exercises: Specificity

Rewrite the following sentences.

1. Mr. Katz’s granddaughter lives with him.

A. You should specify which granddaughter lives with
Mr. Katz, especially if he has more than once
granddaughter or if not all his granddaughters live
with him. IN addition, should specify where he lives.
Corrected version: Mr. Katz’s youngest
granddaughter, Caitlin, lives with him in his house in
Marietta, Georgia.

2. At the time of the alleged incident, my client was

shopping.
A. This sentence can be made more specific. Corrected
version: My floral Vera Bradley bag was stolen.

3. My bag was stolen.

A. Specify which bill you’re talking about. Corrected
version: The health care bill doesn’t have bipartisan
support.

13. Parallelism

Parallelism requires all elements in a list or a

sentence to be presented in a similar – or parallel fashion.
By using the same or similar grammatical form for
coordinated elements, parallelism makes the content of a
sentence apparent and accessible. (“Similar grammatical
form” means that nouns are matched with other nouns,
verbs are matched with other verbs, prepositional phrases
with other prepositional phrases, and so on. Coordinated
elements include “and,” “but,” “or,” “nor,” and so on.)
match key words in each sentence. Coordinating
conjunctions, correlative conjunctions (such as either/or,
neither/nor, both/and, not only/but also), and comparisons
should also be parallel.

Exercises: Parallelism

Rewrite the following sentences.

1. Not only were the court clerks afraid of the judge but
also the court attorney.
A. This sentence sounds incomplete. It should be
rephrased to sound clearer. Corrected version: The
court clerks were afraid not only of the judge but also
of the court attorney.

2. The defense attorney pleaded that his client was not

guilty by reason of insanity, NGRI, and that his client
should be committed to a psychiatric facility.
A. There are two errors in this exercise. The first is that
the word that is repeated. The second is that the
acronym (NGRI) is not in parentheses. Corrected
version: The defense attorney pleaded that because
his client was not guilty by reason of insanity
(NGRI), the defendant should be committed to a
psychiatric facility.

3. Officer Rodriguez saw the defendant and plaintiff at

 the scene of the crime.
A. Keep correlative conjunctions parallel to make the
sentence legible. Also, eliminate all wordiness from
this sentence. Corrected version: Officer Rodriguez
saw both the defendant and the plaintiff at the crime
scene.

14. Subject/Verb Proximity

Good sentences keep their subjects and verbs next to

each other. The shorter the distance between the subject
and verb in a sentence, the greater the cohesion and
understanding. A short distance – or no distance –
between the subject and the very also reduces wordiness.

Exercises: Subject/Very Proximity

Rewrite the following sentences.

1. Information about the surgical procedures Ms. Flores

has undergone in the last ten years will be required
by the court.
A. This sentence can be rewritten in the active voice so
that the subject and the verb are closer together.
Corrected version: The court will require
information about Ms. Flores’s surgical history from
the last decade.

2. My paper, though it exceeded the page limit set by

the professor, was accepted and given an A-.
A. The subject is at the beginning of the sentence, while
the verb is near the end of the sentence. Corrected
version: Although my paper exceeded my
professor’s predetermined page limit, he accepted it
 and even gave it an A-.

3. Charlie, who is set to become the owner of the

company after his father’s death, wasn’t at the board
meeting discussing the future of the company.
A. This sentence can be rewritten so that the subject and
the verb are closer together. Corrected version:
Although Charlie is set to become the company’s
owner after his father’s death, he wasn’t at the board
meeting to discuss the company’s future.

15. Usage and Placement of Transition Words

You can’t eliminate transition words entirely, but you

shouldn’t use a transition at the beginning of a sentence
unless you want to be dramatic or emphatic. Sometimes
it’s counterintuitive to use transitions at the end of your
sentences. Doing do emphasizes the transitions and
forces readers to look back to earlier sentences. If drama.
Emphasis, or contrast is not desired, place the transition
after the subject, in the first part of the sentence. There’s
a difference between “Although Paul’s always late, he’s a
good worker” and “Although Paul’s a good worker, he’s
always late.” The meaning of this sentence depends on
the emphasis of the transition word although.

Don’t be afraid to begin sentences with “and” or

“but.” But don’t start every sentence with them. The
rules of plain speaking and plain writing provide that it’s
better to begin a sentence with “and” or “but” than with
“and” or “but” is formal enough for the front page of the
New York Times and the Wall Street Journal, it’s formal
enough for legal writing.
 The best writing repeats key words, name, phrases,
and concepts but doesn’t repeat transition words. When
possible, eliminate transition words altogether. If the
logic that moves your ideas forward is sound, your
readers will connect the thoughts without needing
transitional devices like furthermore, however, moreover,
and therefore. (If the transition word can’t be eliminated
completely, put a conjunctive adverb a third into the
sentence.) To ensure that your ideas are being developed
soundly, move sentences from short to long, from simple
to complex, and from old to new, ending with power and
climax. Include a topic sentence – a sentence that clearly
states what you’ll be discussing in the paragraph. And
include a roadmap, or theses, paragraph at the start of
each point. Roadmaps tell your readers what’s being
discussed, what you’re arguing, and in which
paragraph(s) of your brief they can find the information
they desire or need.

Exercises: Usage and Placement of Transition Words

Read the paragraphs below and edit them by using

the transition usage and placement rules to create a new,
better paragraph.

On July 4, 2015, New York City native Joshua

Brandt, along with his seven-year old daughter, Carly,
was at his neighbor’s house celebrating Independence
Day by setting off fireworks. First, they began with
small-scale fireworks, such as sparklers, pop-rocks, and
tanks. Afterward, they moved onto larger fireworks, like
Roman candles and cakes. Presumably because shooting
off fireworks as a private resident has been illegal in New
York for decades, the group was setting them off in the
backyard. However, the backyard was small and no one
was able to put much space between them and the
explosives. Consequently, everyone present was at risk of
getting burned. Regrettably, Carly was helping her
neighbor set off a Roman candle firework when it
exploded prematurely. Carly and her neighbor, forty-
year-old Dominic Amato, were both injured in the blast.
All things considered, they got off easy, but both had to
be hospitalized afterward. Amato sustained first-degree
burns on his abdomen, and Carly suffered second-degree
burns to her face and chest. Ultimately, Amato was
arrested for possessing illegal fireworks. Also, Brandt
was arrested, but his charges were dropped. However, he
has since brought a lawsuit against Amato, alleging that
Amato is responsible for Carly’s injuries and that he
should therefore pay for damages.

1. Change the placement of the transition word in

Sentence #2..
2. Combine Sentence #2 with Sentence #3 to eliminate
the transition word in Sentence #3..
3. Replace the transition word in Sentence #4 with
another word.

Answers: Usage and Placement of Transition Words

On July 4, 2015, New York City native Joshua

Brandt, along with his seven-year-old daughter Carly, was
at his neighbor’s house celebrating Independence Day by
setting off fireworks. The first fireworks they set off were
small – pop-rocks, sparklers, tanks, etc. – but as the
evening progressed they began setting off larger
fireworks, including cakes and Roman candles.

Since shooting off fireworks has been illegals for

private residents in New York for decades, though, the
group was setting them off in the backyard. The
neighbor’s backyard was small, however, and everyone
present was at risk of getting burned because it was
impossible to put much space between them and the
explosives.

At approximately 10:00 p.m., Carly was helping her

neighbor, 40-year-old Dominic Amato, set off a Roman
candle. It exploded prematurely, and both Carly and
Amato were injured in the blast. Amato, who sustained
first-degree burns to his abdomen, and Carly, who
suffered second-degree burns to her face and chest, both
had to be hospitalized.

After Amato was discharged from the hospital, he

was arrested for possessing illegal fireworks. Brandt was
also arrested, but his charges were dropped. He later sued
Amato, alleging that Amato is responsible for Carly’s
injuries and should therefore pay for the damages.

16. Quotations

It’s bad form to begin sentences or paragraphs with

quotations. When you quote, give context; a good lead-in
to your quotation guides readers into the quotation and
tells them what they should look for. Quote only what’s
essential and what you can’t say better than authoritative
sources. And make sure you use quotation marks when
quoting someone or something directly. It’s plagiarism if
you don’t, but scholarship if you do.

All edits, alterations, additions, and deletions need to

be evident. Use brackets or ellipses to show changes. A
bracket is used when you change the capitalization of the
first letter of a quoted word, to add a word to the
quotation, or to alter a work. A three-dot ellipsis is used
to show omissions in the middle of a sentence of
punctuation or of one of more words. A four-dot ellipsis
is used to omit the last part of a quoted sentence, provided
that the omitted section isn’t a citation, footnote, or
endnote and that the remaining portion is an independent
clause.

Use double quotation marks to open and close a

quotation: “xx.” Add and close a quotation within a
quotation with a single quotation mark: “xx ‘yy’ xx.” Or:
“xx ‘yy.’”

Don’t use quotation marks around block quotations –

quotations of 50 words or more. A quotation that long
should be blocked: single-spaced, indented left and right,
with citation on the line after the quotation ends, and
without quotation marks (unless there’s a quotation within
a quotation). Note that New York courts add the citation
on the same line as the quotation and require that
quotation marks surround the quotation.

Question marks, exclamation points, and dashes

should be placed within the quotation only if they’re part
of the original quotation. If they’re not, they go after the
quotation mark. All periods and commas are correctly
placed in U.S. style inside the quotation marks. Colons,
semicolons, and footnote or endnote numbers are
correctly placed outside the quotation mark.

Exercises: Quotations

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. While testifying, Samantha said, “Only one person
could’ve committed this crime”.
A. A period always goes inside the quotation mark.
Corrected version: While testifying, Samantha said,
“Only one person could’ve committed this crime.”

2. The intern asked, Is the New York Times a newspaper

I should read daily?
A. In this example, the intern is aking a question.
Quotation marks should be placed around the
question. Corrected version: The intern asked, “Is
the New York Times a newspaper I should read
daily?”

3. Ms. Jones pointed to the defendant when the

prosecution asked, who robbed you.
A. The question mark goes inside the quotation mark.
Corrected version: Ms. Jones pointed to the
defendant when the prosecution asked, “who robbed
you?”

17. Hyphens

Hyphenate between compound adjectives

immediately before a noun. Don’t hyphenate if the
compound adjective appears after the noun. Commonly
used compound adjectives don’t need to be hyphenated.
Hyphenate after “well” if it’s used in an adjectival phrase.
You can still hyphenate after “well” even if it isn’t used in
an adjectival phrase but the phrase wouldn’t mean the
same thing if it’s flipped around.

Hyphenate when using the prefixes or suffixes all,

ex, quasi, and self. Don’t hyphenate “self” when it’s
added to a suffix, and don’t hyphenate an adverb or
adjective ending in –ly. In addition, if you add a prefix or
letters to the beginning of a word without a hyphen,
you’ll confuse your reader. There’s a major difference in
meaning between “pre-judicial” and “prejudicial.”
Example: “Plaintiff moved for summary judgment.”
Becomes “Before the court is plaintiff’s summary-
judgment motion.” Rephrasing the sentence makes the
sentence clearer.

Hyphenate when you spell any two-word number

greater than 20 but lower than 100. Example: “The
attorney has twenty three witnesses who place the
defendant at the scene of the crime.” Becomes: “The
attorney has twenty-three witnesses who place the
defendant at the scene of the crime.” (This issue won’t
come up if you prefer to write “23,” not ‘twenty-three.”)

Exercises: Hyphens

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. She’s a small claims attorney.

A. Without a hyphen, this sentence could mean that
she’s a small attorney who handles claims. Corrected
version: She’s a small-claims attorney.

2. Jake Jerome has 33 counts of felony assault on his

Criminal-Court record.
A. Hyphenate numbers from 21 to 99. Hyphenate
“Criminal Court” only when it’s written in lower
case. Corrected version: Jake Jerome has thirty-
three counts of felony assault on his Criminal Court
record.
3. John Miller is a well known civil rights activist.
A. “Well” is used in an adjectival phrase. Hyphenate.
Corrected version: John Miller is a well-known civil
rights activist.

18. Commas

A comma separates introductory elements from the

main part of the sentence. The introductory element can
be a word, phrase, or clause about then, where, how, or
why the action in the sentence occurs. Without a comma
after an introductory clause, the sentence might confuse
the reader. If there’s no possibility that the reader will
misread the sentence, an introductory comma can be
omitted after a short adverb clause or phrase.

A comma must precede a coordinating conjunction

connecting two or more independent clauses. The seven
coordinating junctions are and, but, for, nor, or. so and
yet. If independent clauses are present, use commas. If
the clauses are short, don’t use a comma. Using a comma
between two independent clauses, rather than a
coordinating conjunction (known as a comma splice),
results in a run-on sentence.

Use a comma when there’s a non-restrictive element.

A nonrestrictive element is a word group that doesn’t
limit or restrict the meaning of the noun or pronoun it
modifies. Because nonrestrictive elements are
nonessential to the meaning of the sentence, the commas
will denote that to the readers. If the element is
restrictive, then its’s essential to the meaning of the
sentence, and there shouldn’t be a comma.
 Legal writers best place transitional or interrupting
words in the middle of a main clause using commas.
Examples of transition words are the conjunctive adverbs
however and therefore.

Exercises: Commas

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. Law school, however is exceptionally expensive.

A. Set off interrupting words with commas. Corrected
version: Law school, however, is exceptionally
expensive.

2. The prosecutor repeated her question but the witness

still didn’t understand.
A. Place a comma before a coordinating conjunction in
a compound sentence. Corrected version: The
prosecutor repeated her question, but the witness still
didn”t understand.

3. Unaware that opposing counsel could hear her the

attorney made an offensive comment.
A. When rreading this sentence, you need to pause
before “the attorney made an offensive comment.”
Insert a comma. Corrected version: Unaware that
opposing counsel could hear her, the attorney made
an offensive comment.

19. Periods, Exclamation Points, and Question Marks

Periods are placed at the ends of declarative

sentences, mild commands, and indirect questions. If a
sentence ends with an abbreviation, use only one period.
Abbreviated titles should always have a period.

Use exclamation points only when trying to convey

strong emotions or surprise. When used properly,
exclamation points represent meanings and tones that
can’t be expressed with a period.

Legal writing doesn’t contain many question marks.

Unless you want to use them as a rhetorical device, use a
question marks only at the end of a direct question. When
making a polite request or a command, don’t use a
question mark. If a sentence begins with “whether,”
don’t use a question mark. When you have a series of
questions, even if they aren’t separate sentences, they
should contain question marks. Whether the first letter of
a sentence is capitalized depends on the preceding
punctuation. Rhetorical questions should end with a
question mark.

Exercises: Periods, Question Marks and Exclamation

Points

Rewrite the following sentences:

1. I’m wondering who’ll win the trial?

A. The sentence isn't a direct question. It shouldn't end
with a question mark. Corrected version: I'm
wondering who'll win the trial.
2. Please submit that brief by Friday?
A. This command should end with a period. Corrected
version: Please submit that brief by Friday.

3. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, if all the evidence

points toward his guilt, will you convict him.
A. The sentence is a question and requires a question
mark. Corrected version: Ladies and gentlemen of the
jury, if all the evidence points toward his guilt, will you
convict him?