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The Witcher (2019)
Bonkers...but in a good way.
First things First. This will inevitably be compared to GoT. This isn't thrones. It doesn't have quite the same budget. As such it suffers occasionally from dips in writing quality and doesn't have quite as strong a cast overall.
But, it doesn't feel cheap and tacky. The lesser budget has been used well and given a chance, I can see this growing into something special.
The Witcher is a strange beast however. To the un initiated, I imagine it being a little tough to get into at first. It is packed with strange rituals, unusual behaviour and weird characters. It's use of disjointed chronology, definitely seems to have thrown some viewers too.
All that being said, at its heart is a pretty action packed and often nicely choreographed, mind bending, bit of swords and sorcerery, without straying into D&D geek territory (No offence to dungeons fans). 4 episodes in, I'm really enjoying it so far.
It's worth noting I've not read the books. so I don't know how it compares, but I have played the games. If you are a fan of the games, you'll love all the little nods to the digital version, even if you don't recognise the story or some of the characters. It also includes baths!!!
I really wasn't sold on Cavill as Geralt at first. But he has won me over, with his gruff, grunting portrayal and occasional humour. Likewise a lot of the main supporting characters, while nothing like their CG counterparts, are all solid and fall into place after a few episodes.
Don't go in expecting multimillion dollar "battle of the bast*rds" level of spectacle, and you might really grow to like this odd animal.
Edit: having watched further on. There are some issues. Each episode is directed by a different person or team. The difference in skill and experience between some of these directors is sometimes glaringly obvious. Compare the first episode, with its gritty atmosphere, solid acting and well choreographed fights, to, say, the later Dragon episode, with its average CG, terrible choreography and overall feel of an episode of Xena warrior Princess from the 90s. It's a real shame these episodes weren't spotted and refined, because they drag the show down unfairly. There are also clearly some young actors cutting their teeth on this series who need a lot more direction. Without a guiding hand their inexperience really shows and their scenes suffer. I hope this gets a second season and I hope Netflix have the good sense to up the budget, and lose some of weaker directors and actors.
Hellboy (2019)
The remake nobody needed...
What a strange beast this Hellboy is. The really glaring issue, is why did they make it at all? The Guillermo Del Toro versions of Hellboy were really nice movies. Sure, they lacked the violence and more grown up nature of the graphic novels, but they had great casting, good directing and excellent set, costume, and creature design. So why did we need another Hellboy?
The Short answer. We didn't....at all!
I like David Harbour, and he fits the bill nicely. He sounds how Hellboy seems he should sound, and he has the stature to physically play him. Likewise, Harbour's face does actually look closer to that of Hellboy in the novels than Ron Pearlman did. but man, oh man is he let down by the makeup department. His face looks like he just smeared in lot's of red paste. Which in truth, he is, but the viewer isn't supposed to know that. And his right hand of doom looks a lot like a plastic kids toy.
The VFX are equally shoddy. I was going to compare the CG in Hellboy to video game cut scenes, but then I realized, video game cut scenes are actually far superior to the animation and composition used here. Physical characters seem to drift independently of their digital counterparts and everything feels blurry and cheap.
The casting choices likewise are odd at best, and terrible at worst. Ian McShane, although a great actor, is just totally out of place as Hellboy's sympathetic, caring father figure. (A role nailed by the late, great John Hurt).
Milla Jovovich tries her best, but struggles to maintain a British accent, and it hurts her performance as a result. The poor dialogue just dooms whatever chance she had left.
The rest of the cast seem to have just been picked at random, without much real thought.
It is nice to see a more diverse cast however, and anything that bunches up the panties of the white power snowflakes, always gets my vote.
It's a messy movie, with a weak script and it never needed to be made at all, but it gets a 4/10 because despite all it's faults, it's just about watchable, especially if you've run out of everything else on Netflix.
The Witcher (2019)
Bonkers...but in a good way.
First things First. This will inevitably be compared to GoT. This isn't thrones. It doesn't have quite the same budget. As such it suffers occasionally from dips in writing quality and doesn't have quite as strong a cast overall.
But, it doesn't feel cheap and tacky. The lesser budget has been used well and given a chance, I can see this growing into something special.
The Witcher is a strange beast however. To the un initiated, I imagine it being a little tough to get into at first. It is packed with strange rituals, unusual behaviour and weird characters. It's use of disjointed chronology, definitely seems to have thrown some viewers too.
All that being said, at its heart is a pretty action packed and often nicely choreographed, mind bending, bit of swords and sorcerery, without straying into D&D geek territory (No offence to dungeons fans). 4 episodes in, I'm really enjoying it so far.
It's worth noting I've not read the books. so I don't know how it compares, but I have played the games. If you are a fan of the games, you'll love all the little nods to the digital version, even if you don't recognise the story or some of the characters. It also includes baths!!!
I really wasn't sold on Cavill as Geralt at first. But he has won me over, with his gruff, grunting portrayal and occasional humour. Likewise a lot of the main supporting characters, while nothing like their CG counterparts, are all solid and fall into place after a few episodes.
Don't go in expecting multimillion dollar "battle of the bast*rds" level of spectacle, and you might really grow to like this odd animal.
Edit: having watched further on. There are some issues. Each episode is directed by a different person or team. The difference in skill and experience between some of these directors is sometimes glaringly obvious. Compare the first episode, with its gritty atmosphere, solid acting and well choreographed fights, to, say, the later Dragon episode, with its average CG, terrible choreography and overall feel of an episode of Xena warrior Princess from the 90s. It's a real shame these episodes weren't spotted and refined, because they drag the show down unfairly. There are also clearly some young actors cutting their teeth on this series who need a lot more direction. Without a guiding hand their inexperience really shows and their scenes suffer. I hope this gets a second season and I hope Netflix have the good sense to up the budget, and lose some of weaker directors and actors.
The Irishman (2019)
Stylish, classy, but indulgent and LONG
The Irishman is a beautifully shot, terrifically acted movie. It's reminiscent of these fine actor's earlier gangster epics, but it is not without it's issues. Some of which are glaring.
Firstly, and most noticeably is the running time. Don't get me wrong. I have no issues with attention span. In my view a movie can be as long as it wants. So long as it fills that time well. The Irishman could have easily been reined-in by 45 minutes at least, without ever hurting the plot or feel of the movie. Sadly, I found myself clock watching on a few occasions in it's three and a half hour run time, and my partner...well she fell asleep at two hours twenty.
As an example, almost an hour of the movie is essentially De Niro going "you gotta calm down, Jimmy" and Al Pacino replying "I won't calm down, Franky". We get it already, he's stubborn, the mob are annoyed.
It is still watchable at this length, (if you have some grit) which is testament to those involved, but it's pushing it and pushing it hard. At times feeling over indulgent. I imagine it would have suffered harsher reviews, had it been a cinema release. The comfort of your own couch, bathroom and access to coffee goes a long way here.
The other issue for me, was the use of Pacino and particularly De Niro, in portraying their characters younger selves. I can't help but feel it would have been more effective to use younger actors of a similar appearance to portray these characters in their earlier years. I have the utmost respect for everyone involved in this, but there comes a point when you have to accept that these guys are no spring chickens. There is some skilled use of makeup (CGI?), but no amount of makeup could hide Pacino's aging posture. He is pushing 80 after all. Yet Here at stages in the movie, Pacino is supposed to be Jimmy Hoffa in his 50's and 60's, possibly even younger.
Worse still, De Niro's character Frank Sheeran is frequently referred to as "kid", yet even with makeup/effects/hair dye he appears to be in his 50's or 60's. Not bad for a guy pushing towards eighty, right?... Not so great when you consider the reality that Sheeran was in his mid twenties when he met Russel Bufalino and began working for the mob. No amount of 'Just For Men' is pulling that illusion off.
Negatives aside, the scenery, attention to detail, costumes and cinematography are all excellent, as is the acting by everyone involved. And, even if you already know the history surrounding Hoffa and the unions, it's still a fairly compelling story.
I found it watchable and enjoyed it in part, but I feel it would have had a lot more impact at a shorter run time. I would have easily given this 8 or 9 out of 10, had it cut to the chase a bit sooner and maybe not leaned so heavily on the makeup team.
Bodyguard (2018)
Strong start...awful finish
The series opens very strong. Great characters, tough subject matter, intrigue and affairs. What could go wrong....
Everything apparently!
From the mid point of the series, it all falls to pieces. The plot holes are so enormous the entire cast falls into them, never to be seen again.
I won't go into spoilers, for those who haven't yet given it a go, but to be honest, if you like a solid thriller, you won't like this. It's just silly towards the end.
The acting is solid by the leads, but the supporting acts are a little weak at times, mostly due to some lazy, cliched dialogue.
The effects and action are all handled well. It was so close to great at the start.
It's just those plot holes!!!! Possibly the worst I have ever seen in a series or movie, or book even! It totally ruins what could have been a real winner.
How this ever got above 8/10, I will never understand.
American Assassin (2017)
Generic
Upon seeing the trailer for this movie, I expected a gritty, twisting action thriller. What I got was a very generic action movie, and not a great one at that.
The movie starts well. We are faced with a traumatic event, reminiscent of recent real world terror attacks. It is all handled well and is really quite visceral and frightening.
We are next presented with a protagonist bent on plotting revenge and destruction. So far, so good.
It's just after this point, that it all starts to fall apart. It quickly switches gear to training montages, that in all honesty, don't look particularly challenging. Montages that jump from a secluded cabin in the woods to a high tech training facility with some very awful AR training simulator that looks about 20 years ahead of the rest of the movie. No doubt to add some un-needed glitz to proceedings.
Next up are the "spies" or assassins themselves. Supposedly the best of the best, trained by the best of the best. Yet somehow they are incapable of intercepting arms dealers without major incident. Incapable of choosing the right locations to intercept enemies. They generally don't seem all that capable at all! Maybe it wasn't a montage after all. Perhaps they really did only train for a day!?!
Government officials bark at each other in cliched style, and on more than a few occasions the protagonist is described by others as "the best I've ever seen" and "off the charts"...urghhhh!
The same protagonist who it seems was written to be unlikable. Off the charts on arrogance perhaps?
I've never seen such a tone shift in a movie before. It starts feeling very real and grounded, and quickly becomes full of scenes with unnecessarily darkened government rooms that are inexplicably full of high tech monitors showing very stylized maps and target locators.
It goes from The Bourne Identity to CSI: Miami in five minutes!
Long story short, this movie is dumb. It relies heavily on characters stupidity to move the plot forward and create action, and it is filled to the brim with cliches. The villain is also your usual two dimensional, psychopath with a grudge.
I've given it a score of 5 for a very simple reason. As an action, no-brainer movie. It's ok. It's worth about a 5. It's not the worst I've ever seen, but it's certainly not the best either. As a gritty action thriller in the realm of Bourne (which the trailers alluded to) it would be lucky to get 1 star!
If you like action that won't tax your brain, and you're stuck for something to watch, it might be option. Otherwise avoid.
Disenchantment (2018)
Empty
I've enjoyed the work of Matt Groening. Both the Simpsons and Futurama were funny shows, with great comedy timing and full of excellent writing.
Disenchantment is a Matt Groening project in look alone.
It is uncomfortably unfunny for the most part. Sure it has it's occasional moments, but they are so few and far between. (the holy man being dropped off a cliff is one example).
Generally speaking, the writing is terrible. Jokes feel forced and the timing is nonexistent. The visual humour is the only thing that occasionally works, but just barely.
It's not just the writing that is lacking though. It seems like everything was done on a shoestring budget.
The sound is awful.
Music is lackluster and the whole show in general seems to lack sound effects. It all feels empty.
The animation isn't great either. It is a mashup of old style Simpsons characters, with a pinch of Futurama, and then a bunch of poorly drawn new additions. Add to this the awkward moments where characters walk and move as if they were part of some terrible amateur dramatics production and it all feels like a mess. This hurts the shows only strength too. It's slapstick. So many of the moments where a character gets kicked in the nethers, or bounced off a wall, just fall flat because the timing and animation is so bad.
Likewise the casting choices seem a poor fit for the most part. Aside from the main character Bean, voiced by Abbi Jacobson, Prince Merkimer, voiced by Matt Berry and Queen Oona, voiced by Tress MacNielle, who all do the best with what they have to work with (Berry in particular fits perfectly here). All the other characters seem flat or just poorly thought out. The king with his thick New York accent, which I know was supposed to be the joke, is just awful. Rather than funny, it's grating!
The demon is another prime example. Not only is his written dialogue flat, but it's delivery just doesn't fit the character.
I think loyalty to Matt Groening must be the only thing that is keeping this above 7 on the ratings. I can't honestly see how anyone older than 5 could find anything of interest here.
I'm sorry Matt, but I just can't see a future for this show unless the budget and writing are seriously pumped up. I can see why this went to Netflix, a provider who's content is becoming increasingly more miss than hit.
Hopefully this is just the bumpy start that both The Simpsons and Futurama had and it will improve in season 2. Fingers crossed.
Stranger Things: Chapter Seven: The Lost Sister (2017)
I can save you an hour..
Trust me, this is better than watching this episode. I can narrate what happens and you can just skip straight to the next episode and not have to be sullied by this awful misstep.
11 sees visions, goes to a city to find the girl from episode one. finds the girl. The girl is number 8, has powers. She and her friends are uninteresting. A bit of Jedi training occurs. Some special effects happen, 11 goes back to Hawkins.
You'll thank me later.
Blade Runner 2049 (2017)
Definitely Blade Runner!
Without doubt this is a sequel and not just another remake, touted as a sequel. It is very much it's own movie. And what a bleak, yet beautiful movie it is!
As I said, it very much a new plot. This isn't the 80's Blade Runner with new actors and new effects. It is a thought provoking and neatly constructed detective/meaning of existence story, set against one of the best dystopian backdrops I have yet seen in cinema. I recently watched the first movie, and I have to say, the sequel has a better, much more solid plot than the original.
Hanz Zimmer's score is perfection! It is reminiscent of the first movie, but adds something totally new. It is haunting and oppressive, which sits perfectly into the grimy, rainy scenes depicted throughout.
The acting by everyone involved is excellent. Gosling, as always shines, with a very subtle, often vulnerable portrayal of the lead character, K. Ford plays his usual, but always great, gruff and somewhat exasperated almost-hero, but this time with much more sensitivity. The real stand-out performance for me though, was Sylvia Hoeks as the character, Luv. Though not in the movie that much, she makes a huge impact whenever on screen. Somewhat mesmerizing, while being totally malevolent at the same time. The entire cast, however put in 100%.
If I were to level one complaint at the movie, it would be the running time. It could have been done to the same effect in a slightly shorter time. It can revel a little too long in it's own sense of worth. That being said, it is a visual feast throughout, so you can almost forgive it's pretensions.
If you like sci-fi, with some brains and a lot of feeling, this is possibly the best I have seen in a long while. It's not fast paced, or action packed, but it will make you think. It is also dark, but beautiful. Just be sure to choose a cinema with comfy seating! It is however definitely one to see on the big screen.
Star Trek: Discovery (2017)
They will come to regret that title
Firstly to explain what I mean. Star trek has always had it's acronyms for the various series. TOS - the original series. TNG - the next generation. DS9 - Deep space 9. And now STD - sexually transmitted disease.....sorry, Star trek Discovery!
Ah where to start. I grew up with Trek. My dad showed me the original series when I was a kid, which was very camp and fun. Then TNG started in my early teens, which I loved. DS9, voyager etc later, also liked. BUT, I'm not a trekker, trekkie, whatever! I don't know how many dilithium crystals it takes to power a star ship, I couldn't tell you how big the enterprise is in feet and I have no uniforms hanging in my closet. So I won't be reviewing this as a direct technical comparison to the originals or on it's chronological nerd flaws, and "oooh that panel wouldn't look like that, that wasn't designed until star date..." Oh shut up!
As a stand alone thing...well...it's not great! It's watchable, but there are some moments when it feels decidedly cheesy. And the plot holes are so big, families of Japanese tourists gather around them with their cameras! It's not just holes. It's needless scenes too... The latest episode featured a punch-up that came out of nowhere, seemingly for no other reason than the writer wanted to see a fight! there are a few moments like this, where you go "why the hell did they do that?"
Dialogue is another issue. The lines are delivered so unbelievably at times, I feel like i'm watching a screen test, or warm up. the script isn't great either, which is probably the real issue. Often the characters will say things that people just wouldn't say in the given circumstances.
On the subject of characters. That is pretty thin on the ground too. Nobody is particularly likable. Micheal is about the only character to root for and even she isn't exactly the warmest glow on the set. She's also very illogical for somebody supposedly trained in the ways of logic!?! Everyone else, even the excellent Doug Jones are just somewhat flat.
Flat leads nicely into the score. The music is AWFUL! The battle music lacks drama. the general ambient music is dull and lifeless and the theme itself seems like several ill-fitting tunes mashed together in the dark! All the in-show music sounds as if it were performed on a Casio keyboard from 1988. Where has the drama gone? We all remember the ridiculous Spock Vs. Kirk fight from TOS (brilliantly parodied in The Cable Guy) Dun dun dunnnnnn dunnnnn dunnnn! Or the excellent alien battle music from the TOS movies. Each side having their own distinct battle music! where did it go wrong!?!
The sets aren't bad. It all looks very shiny and expensive, but the aliens...erm, somebody needs to tell the make-up folks to ease up! the Klingons can barely turn their heads, or talk for that matter! I feel great pity for those actors. If there is an award for on-set suffering, these guys are a shoe-in!
This show doesn't really feel like Star Trek, and that's OK. Change is nothing to be feared. The problem here is some of the production values. A weak script, very weak music, cheesy unnecessary action moments, some slightly inconsistent visual effects and illogical decisions being made by logical people. All serve to ruin what could have been a winner.
Watchable, but you will find yourself wincing occasionally at the dialogue and "action".
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
Batman AND Superman Vs. plot and storytelling...
...Sadly, Bats and Soop win the above fight.
Possible spoilers ahead, but to be honest the movie spoils your day enough on it's own. If you watch it after reading this, then you deserve everything you get anyway!
The movie was horrible. Do not believe the 6+ rating. The 5 star and above reviews are from children and fan boys who refuse to admit to themselves that this was utter garbage, just because they love the characters!
I NEVER fall asleep during a movie. I even managed to stay awake through the art-house cr*p-fest, Solaris, which is an almost impossible feat, that I feel should come with some type of reward, or medal. I managed to drift off in BvS just after the bizarre dream sequence. I'm so glad I waited for this movie on Sky!
It jumps all over the place. The plot is incoherent and full of holes. The acting is acceptable, but dull. Characters that famously behave one way, behave totally differently, just to allow lazy writing and set up stupid action scenes. Essentially what this movie is saying, is that Bruce Wayne is smart enough to conceal his identity, build crazy gadgets and even fight the man of steel one on one..... but is too dumb to talk things out with superman. Yet just sharing a mothers name with your enemy, suddenly makes them your buddy. I'll be sure to try and guess my opponent's mothers name in my next bar brawl, and wrap things up quickly!
The sudden and pointless inclusion of a super enemy at the end, just to allow for the protagonists to join forces and fight lot's of visual effects for 20 mins, was just lazy nonsense.
I could list plot inconsistencies all day long, but I already wasted enough time on this movie, but I will say this in regards to the ending in particular. The Kryptonians banned the super monster because it was just TOOOOOO dangerous, yet it can be taken out by one Kryptonian, an amazon and....er.. a fella in a rubber suit! Yet a WHOLE planet of Kryptonians were scared of it!?! Really?
If you enjoy flashing lights and punch sounds for 2 hours, or you love being angry, or you have recently sustained a catastrophic head injury resulting in a drastic loss of intelligence, then this movie is for you!
Santa Clarita Diet (2017)
If you can suspend disbelief enough...
I wanted to like this, I really did. I'm a big fan of Timothy Olyphant and Drew Barrymore and the whole horror/comedy, zombie concept is great.
Sadly, I didn't get past the third episode. My problem here, was the need to suspend disbelief to epic proportions. I am always willing to turn a blind eye to plot holes, inconsistencies, or full blown madness, if the story/characters etc. are entertaining enough, but even I have a line in the sand.
The problem here is, the family are far too ready to accept the bizarre goings-on. Even the neighbour doesn't seem at all phased by what would make any normal human run a mile, straight to the police/army/exorcist!
I know it's a comedy and shouldn't be taken too seriously. And of course zombies don't exist, so I shouldn't over analyse, but the writers could have easily drawn out the story a bit more and justified the other characters coming to terms with the events of the show. It was all too easy. It's all just a bit "oh, mom is a zombie murderer, oh well"
It's not helped, by the fact nobody seems all that keen to be in this either. The acting, from talented actors, feels a little phoned in and some of the dialogue is a little weak, which just adds to the too the unbelievable aspect. I think the script is mostly to blame here.
I've given it 5, purely because I like the cast, and I only got as far as 3, so it is possible it improves, i'm just not fussed enough to find out.
Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016)
Makes you feel happy
I was left with a perma-grin when this movie finished. It's silly, funny, touching and sweet, but never saccharin.
It's jam packed with irreverent humour, in-jokes at New Zealand's expense and pokes fun at outsiders preconceptions of Kiwi's.
The characters are also all great. It's probably my favourite role I've seen Sam Neil play in a long time. He is brilliant. The supporting cast are likewise, excellent. Rachel House's child protection officer, has some of the funniest lines and plays what could have easily been an over-the-top character, on just the right side of mad. Her moment on Kiwi breakfast TV had me rolling on the floor.
The star of the show however, is Julian Dennison's gangster orphan. Who's crimes include such heinous acts as, loitering and throwing stuff. He is effortlessly funny throughout and very likable. He is able to handle subtle humour, sensitivity and drama in a way that would put many actors 3 times his age to shame.
The locations too are beautiful, really showing off NZ's landscape.
If you like comedy with a bit of heart and don't mind silliness on occasion, this movie is right up your street. It's funny and touching and puts most (if not all) the recent U.S efforts to shame.
"NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND"
Arrival (2016)
Not what you would expect, perhaps
First things first. This isn't really a sci-fi film. It is more of a drama, set against a sci-fi backdrop. I think this has lead to the movies unfortunate handful of poor reviews. Some expected explosions and punching, and instead got a thought provoking, calmly paced drama, with some interesting science behind it.
The cinematography is beautiful throughout. Everything shot in a cold twilight grey. It adds to the mood of foreboding throughout the entire film. Likewise the score is great. A sometimes creepy, sometimes beautiful, almost alien soundtrack, which obviously fits perfectly.
As for the plot. It seems many found it hard to understand and as a result, found the movie boring. I personally can't understand this, as it is in fact quite straightforward, but I won't spoil it by dissecting it in the review. If you were able to follow interstellar (another great sci-fi drama) then you will have no issues with this.
Ultimately, it's about your expectations and tastes, as to whether you will enjoy this or not. If you go into it, expecting or wanting gun battles and explosions, then you will be sorely disappointed. If you go into it, expecting a slowly paced, emotional and clever sci- fi/drama , then you will probably enjoy this great movie. It is moving, touching, menacing and thought-provoking and a great break from the usual running and screaming sci-fi that gets churned out so often.
Spectral (2016)
A homage to the gaming world
Not a bad movie. In fact better than some of the huge budget offerings intended for cinema, lately.
Don't get me wrong, it's got all the usual clichés. A heroic scientist, tough American soldiers who don't take no s___ and distrust heroic scientists, and the tough female agent. It's also got it's plot holes and as is often the case with this genre, the heroes always manage to be stood in the right place to not get killed, while "nameless soldier" gets it! They also love a montage, where incredible weapons and sciency stuff can be created in only a few hours! But I could forgive all this, because it was fun to watch and didn't feel like a chore at any point.
Sure, it won't fire your brain cells to their full extent, but like I said, it has nice touches and a very nice feel, visually. It is reminiscent of recent computer games, such as Gears of War or Titanfall, leading me to believe the creators may be gaming fans. They do get that feel right however. I'd even go as far as to say, give Paul W S Anderson (a staple game/movie director) his WELL deserved marching orders and let this team handle the next game to movie conversion. They seem to understand the look well.
It also borrows from previous action/sci-fi movies at some stages. I got a feel of Aliens at one point, and the overall story is VERY reminiscent of Final Fantasy The Spirits Within. There are lot's of little touches throughout, that made me feel I'd been here before, but they never went to the 'ripping off' point, but more a nostalgic tip of the hat to previous sci-fi.
The acting is all solid, aside from moments where the characters don't seem quite troubled enough, considering they may be snuffed out by an invisible force at any moment, but that is often the case with these movies, due to the short amount of time they have to set the scene, develop characters and tell the story, but aside from this, everyone is likable, if a little two dimensional overall. I think this is why serialised tories are taking off so much in recent years.
The visual effects are also very nice and miles better than I expected for a straight to Netflix movie. I can't recall any moment where I cringed at the effects. The war-torn sets were also nicely done.
Don't go in expecting some sci-fi epic that will change your world view. Go in expecting a bit of fun, with some nice effects and a simple story. Not a bad way to spend an hour and forty eight minutes, if you like sci-fi.
It Follows (2014)
It Blows
May contain spoilers, but not really.
The idea wasn't too bad, but the way it was put together is not good at all. The whole thing feels like a student film, and not a particularly good one.
At no point do any of the protagonists parents, seem to give a damn about where their kids are, or troubled by the fact they keep taking the car and vanishing for days! And when characters do die, or are injured, none of their friends seem all that phased by it. Everyone in this, is a bit, well, blank!
Also one character, who is suspected of kidnapping and reported to the police, manages to totally vanish, purely by using an alias. Yet the kids in this movie manage to track him down, with some very basic detective work, all so he can fully explain the plot to them!
The musical score, as others have said, is interesting (80's synth keyboard) but it in no way suits the movie and is almost grating on your ears at times. It would have fit in a retro sci-fi, but not in this.
The movie trundles on from one un-scary encounter to another, culminating in....well, not much.
A good idea, wasted on poor score choice, bad pacing, and some OK, but characterless acting. This movie feels like something some teen girls came up with for a school project at Halloween.
Even if Horror floats your boat, you probably won't find much of interest here. Slow and poorly planned. A shame.
Oh, and putting dark filters on the camera, does not add atmosphere alone!
Odd Thomas (2013)
What is wrong with everyone???
Did I watch a different movie? (Or are all the positive reviewers here only 13 years old?)
This movie is horrible! And not in a good way for a horror movie. It's just plain terrible.
Right from the off, I felt uncomfortable, knowing this was shaping up to be a corn-filled turd. And that was in the first five minutes! Right from the start, we are confronted by a ridiculous chase sequence, that goes on too long and then is just brushed under the carpet like nothing happened.
The actors seem to be struggling to act convincingly the entire time. I don't think this is their fault however. The script is so corny, and teen TV show orientated, even screen heavy-weights like Dafoe can't make it work. Some of the lines in this movie, wouldn't be out of place in an episode of Hannah Montana! Apparently everyone in this one horse town, speaks like "hip" teenagers. Even the police chief!
The visual effects are solid enough (with some low budget moments), but the real problem is atmosphere. This movie has none. The scenes are all so well lit, it's almost as if there is a lighting crew following Odd and his friends around the town! Which of course there is, but we aren't supposed to KNOW it! Even at night it's like daytime! This means there is no tension or fear, which the book was full of.
Long story short, this feels like a TV episode (and not a good breaking bad/game of thrones TV show, think more 90's TV). The actors tried their best, but there was no rescue from that script, and the whole affair was let down by total lack of atmosphere and pacing.
I would like to thank all the positive reviewers for wasting an afternoon my life! I won't be trusting IMDb reviews anymore.
This film stinks!
Penny Dreadful (2014)
Maybe too early to tell?
I may be jumping the gun reviewing this so early into it's run, but I thought I'd share my thoughts so far...
On the surface, this is a very well put together series. They clearly have a decent budget and they spend it well. The sets and locales are impressive and the effects very solid.
Sadly though, I can't help but feel this show is trying to ride the coat tails of the far superior Game of Thrones. I'm not comparing the two directly. They are very different shows and normally I wouldn't, but Penny Dreadful does seem intent on shocking with lot's of gore and a healthy splash of the "C" word, but it just doesn't shock. It feels forced. Whereas in Thrones the violence and language just seemed to fit, and it did shock, or at least entertain. Here it falls somewhat flat.
I can't help but feel the pace could use some revving up too. On occasion they aim for moody tension and hit slightly bland instead. At no point so far have I been left aghast at what I'm seeing. No shocking plot twists, or interesting reveals and the so far slightly weak story line doesn't compensate for it.
However, the acting is all very good. Particularly from the three main protagonists. Their characters are also interesting. I just hope they are fleshed out more as the show progresses.
With the talent on board and the budget, this show could be a real winner. I just hope they pick up the pace a little in the coming weeks. Maybe I am being premature, and hopefully it's just a slow burner that will develop over time.
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013)
Such a shame!
I remember watching Anchorman 1 on DVD, having missed it at the cinema. The first time I saw it, I wasn't impressed, maybe I was in the wrong mood. The second time however I was in fits of laughter. I loved it!
I tried that with this. Sadly, I just cringed even more the second time around!
I had such high hopes for Anchorman 2, but alas, I've been let down. Sure it has some very funny moments, "i'm blind" and "cruise control" spring to mind, but overall it's just anchorman one, shot again with all it's jokes and situations taken too far. I cringed much more than I laughed.
I think it's time this craze for ad-libbing in U.S comedy was reined in. It seems they are trying to out-do each other and it's getting silly. Sometimes it's good to have a script guys!!
It's not that I didn't enjoy this movie, it was OK, but I've seen much better comedies and I expected more from the talent in this.
Watch the Ron Burgundy Dodge TV ads instead, they are much funnier!
The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (2013)
Underrated and undeservedly "bashed"
If like me, you are in your mid thirties or older, you probably remember comedies like "the Burbs" and "Fletch Lives". This movie is reminiscent of lets 80's/early 90's titles like those.
And I think that is a good thing! It doesn't rely on an endless tirade of d**k and gay jokes, like pretty much every other comedy released in recent years. Let's face it, anything with the names "Seth Rogen" or "Danny McBride" on the cast list have been guaranteed to be one long penis joke set to a backdrop of repressed homosexuality. (It's getting old guys!)
A lot of the humor is subtle, probably why a generation of people spoon- fed reality TV don't git it. It does also have it's sillier moments though, but they work in the context of the movie. Steve Carell is on top form and delivers a sleazy but still likable performance. Special mention should also go to Olivia Wilde, who pulls off some great humorous moments, her inability to walk in heels at the beginning is a nice touch. Jim Carey too goes somewhat against his usual "crazy" character and plays a self obsessed David Blaine-esq "street magician" (his drill 'trick' had me in fits of laughter - taa daa!)
If you are looking for a comedy that has subtly, heart and some old fashioned silliness, then this could be the movie for you. If not, I'm sure the hangover part 100 will be out soon.
In Time (2011)
Good thing it isn't real, this would have been a SERIOUS waste of time!
I saw the trailer for this, and thought, wow, what an intriguing idea for a movie and for the first 10 minutes I was right.
Then it all went wrong! It's not often that I'm tempted to turn a movie off half way through, in fact I think I've only done it once before (mike myers - The Love Guru)
In the end I did manage to sit through the whole thing, but only so my partner and I could mock it.
I see what the director/set crew have tried to do, make this movie grim and bleak, but instead they have hit BLAND and hit it so hard it's teeth fell out! I've never seen so many shades of beige used in a movie before and it seems to take place in the same 3 or 4 locations, re-used repeatedly. It seems the designers tried to be stylish too, in choosing retro sports cars for the police interceptors, but instead, it just looks tacky. Everything about this movie seems tacky, as though it were made on a shoe-string budget. Which would be excusable if it hadn't cost them $40,000,000!
As for the characters....WOW! what characters??? Timberlake, who can usually hold his own remarkable well for a presenter turned singer, turned actor, totally phones in his performance. He never seems overly bothered by anything going on around him (something that pretty much every character suffers with in this) It's not his fault alone though, Cillian Murphy, hams it up so badly it looks like he's auditioning for "maniac cop" and Amanda Seyfried is so boring you don't care if her clock runs out. (I would of stolen her time while she slept just to be rid of her!)
Spoilers coming!!!!
The villain of the piece, the leader of the "minute men" or whatever he's called, is possibly the most ridiculous character in the movie (and that takes some doing) He over-acts to a West End Shakespearean level and is about as threatening as a dolphin chewing a Chibi Pet, and Why in the name of all that's sane would you challenge a guy to a (really poorly thought out) "duel" that runs a serious risk of ending your life, when you have a team of thugs with guns and the upper hand??? Steal their time, kill them and go back to being a pantomime villain MORON!
Another truly moronic moment (there are many) Is when Murphy's character neglects his time dose, even though it takes seconds to do and the machine that does it is next to him, just so he can chase down Sallis??? (something he could've done AFTER topping up!) This goes for the main protagonists too. Why do they not leave themselves enough time to survive, even though they had millions of hours to play around with, instead creating needless moments of "tension". Ultimately it smacks of poor writing, if you have to constantly use the characters stupidity to generate cliff-hanger moments.
This was a great premise, wasted on poor writing, poor directing and some bad acting, (from actors who are capable of so much more!) oh and somebody PLEASE shoot the location scout!
How this ever garnered 6.6 on here is beyond me!
If you like beige, you'll LOVE this!