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Astrology

Get your freak on: Is your zodiac sign among the 4 freakiest?

Get your freak on.

According to astrologer Georgina Easterbrook, aka Athenas Crystals, four signs among the zodiac are certified freaks … seven days a week.

To the tune of the tequila sonnet One Margarita” by CasaDi, and one serious hair swoop, Easterbrook breaks down her picks for the freakiest signs under the sun.

Learn more about Easterbrook’s selections and whether your sign made the cut below.

Because Mars is our planet of getting off and getting it on, read for your Mars sign as well. In fellow freakiness, see here for the astrological reason why Gen Z is the freakiest generation yet.

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

The power color for Aries is red, and their MO is ready for anything. rotozey – stock.adobe.com

Aries is the first-born sign in the zodiac, and as such, their energy is experimental, impatient, horny and curious.

Novelty twists the nipples of this contingent, who are more likely to give it a go than ever say no to a dare or a codpiece.

Ruled by Mars, the planet of action and initiation, they come correct with enthusiasm for trying something new, be it a strap-on, a swinger party, cannibal play, genital mummification or cake sitting.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

Sex is a stage for Leo. alexkoral – stock.adobe.com

Leo is ruled by the sun and motivated by a deep need to be seen and celebrated.

For lions, it ain’t sex; it’s performance art.

These people will do almost anything to stand apart from the crowd or earn a standing ovation for their prowess. It’s a pick-me energy that easily lends itself to pushing boundaries and satisfying fantasies.

Of all the signs, Leo is voted most likely to masturbate to their own sex tape or make a coffee table book out of their high-end nudes — looking at you, Madonna.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

Virgos are the filthiest clean freaks you’ll ever meet. Nikoletta – stock.adobe.com

Virgo is the sleeper freak of the zodiac.

The trope of the dominatrix librarian is born from the buttoned-up demeanor of these mutable earth signs. While they might insist their bed sheets have hospital corners, what they do between them is about as far from sterile as imaginable; we’re talking all manner of decadence, depravity, fluids, filth and freedom.

Superfreak himself, Mr. Rick James, had Mars in Virgo.

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

Scorpio is sex you won’t soon forget. goldeneden – stock.adobe.com

Scorpio rules the eighth house of sex, secrets and transformation, and these people are willing to do what it takes and commit all manner of dark, unexpected or shocking sex acts to ensure you blush when you remember getting it on with them on your deathbed.

The person who first breathlessly anointed their orgasm la petite mort, aka “the little death,” had unequivocally just been laid by a scorpion.

Bonus: Scorpios would rather leverage blackmail than kiss and tell, making them excellent partners for those who want to get down on the down low.


Astrology 101: Your guide to the star


Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and irreverently reports back on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture, and personal experience.