Show and tell became smoke and tell when a 4-year-old Indianapolis boy brought $7,500 worth of crack cocaine to school and told pals it was flour.
“Obviously, [his] parents aren’t going to get any ‘Parent of the Year’ awards. This could have killed these kids,” said Sgt. Roger Tuchek.
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Don’t mess with a pizza lover.
That’s the lesson a masked robber learned when held up Stoney’s Pizza in Columbus, Ohio, and was confronted by J.R. Croy, a longtime customer who didn’t like his favorite eatery being messed with.
Croy raced into action, using his truck to block the gunman’s getaway and then hitting him four times with a sledgehammer.
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What a corny outfit!
A University of Nebraska scientist has developed a process to convert cornhusks into fibers that can be woven into fabric.
Yiqi Yang has made a sweater from three pounds of husks and said the process can “increase corn’s value for our farmers.”
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A man has filed an official complaint with consumer-protection officials – accusing a hooker of giving him bad service.
Adrian Craciunoiu, from Gorj, Romania, said, “She didn’t do her best, and even scratched me because she missed some of her teeth.”
No, we don’t know what that means either.
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A German artist has written to zoos asking them if they’d feed his body to the piranhas once he’s dead.
Karl Lentze, acknowledging that piranhas like living prey, said, “They could always poke my body with sticks to get me moving and get the fish interested.”
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Speaking of those wild and wacky Germans, it seems Germany can no longer afford state aid to help its yodelers buy lederhosen.
“We no longer want to sponsor the lederhosen with subsidies,” Bavarian Premier Edmund Stoiber said, ignoring outcries from traditional folk groups, some of whom have threatened to boycott the Munich Oktoberfest.
A good pair of goat-suede lederhosen will set you back $185.