OUT OF HIS TREE: Presumably, California child-protection officers were among the estimated 27 million viewers who watched British reporter Martin Bashir’s two-hour Michael Jackson documentary on ABC last week. Now we can only hope the authorities have the courage to rescue the real victims of this sad story.
Look, we all know Jacko is wacko. If he wants to risk his own neck climbing his “magic tree” on the Neverland Ranch, that’s fine. It just proves his own tree is missing a few leaves. If he insists he’s had only two nose jobs and wants to lie about the cheek and chin implants, the cleft in his chin and the eye lift and lip reshaping, I guess that’s an ego thing. Plenty of others lie about their cosmetic work.
Eccentricity is one thing, but stealing babies (placenta intact) from the delivery room moments after birth is not normal, it’s abhorrent! Dressing up dolls and pretending they are his children is plain sick. At age 44, preferring slumber parties with children instead of sex with an adult partner is horrifying.
“Protecting” his three young ones by dressing them in bizarre veils and peculiar masks lest their faces be seen by the prying eyes of paparazzi cameras – then parading them before other cameras like prancing monkeys – is bordering on criminal.
There’s no point asking Jackson to take a good look at himself. He is beyond that. Has he gone totally crazy? I leave you to judge that. But in my opinion, it would be pure insanity if this two-hour piece of damning evidence is not used to give these three abused children a chance to have a real life!
SCENE, NOT HEARD: Another incident involving children last week left me troubled. I attended a performance of “Cabaret” at Studio 54. Fabulous! I was told it was “Kids on Broadway Week.” Great! But these two things don’t go together, and I just wonder who was responsible for mixing them.
There were a lot of adults in the audience who were very uneasy to be surrounded by so many children as the show’s well-known story line swept through nudity, lingerie and unsettling images. Even some of the stars on the stage, Neil Patrick Harris (the emcee) and Tom Bosley (Herr Schultz), told me later they were a bit uncomfortable with so many little faces looking up at them from the audience. “I’m wondering if they even understood the story line,” Harris said. Probably not.
My theater pal, talk-show hostess Caroline Rhea, was bombarded by munchkin autograph seekers who recognized her from her role on “Sabrina, The Teenage Witch.” She didn’t mind that but, like me, she was deeply perplexed that some adults had brought children to this show. “It’s not exactly the best entertainment for kids,” said Rhea, who has nephews and insisted she wouldn’t dare expose them to a story with such a disturbing ending.
As a mom, I agree. The sight of innocent individuals dressed in prison stripes, with numbers tattooed on their wrists and marching solemnly to the gas chamber, is far too frightening for young children. I know it is part of history they eventually will have to learn, but I don’t think this is a lesson that should have been part of their Broadway experience!
OLDIES BUT GOODIES: The stars turned out to celebrate legendary gossip diva Liz Smith’s 80th birthday last week. Those who helped make it a memorable night included Tommy Tune, who serenaded Liz with a personalized Broadway number; “The Divine Ms. M,” Bette Midler, who also sang; a sequined Liza Minnelli and her hubby, David Gest; Liz’s longtime (as in 60 years!) buddy and phenomenal director Joel Schumacher; former Texas Gov. Ann Richards, who was a spitfire emcee; TV icons Walter Cronkite and Barbara Walters; New York Post Editor-in-Chief Col Allan and his lovely wife, Sharon; and the evening’s hostess, Cynthia McFadden, who led the group in a boisterous rendition of “Happy Birthday.”
The entire evening was an incredible display of love and adoration. May you have many more, Liz!
VICTORIA’S SECRET: Honeymoon plans have reached a stalemate between Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. I hear he wants to head for the Caribbean, and she’s insistent on the Mediterranean.