David Cloutman's Random Page That's Not About Software Engineering

I'm a computer programmer living in San Francisco. I built my first personal "Web site" in 1995 and have been building websites and web applications since. At some point "Web site" became one word and lost the capital W. I blame humans.

I blame humans for a lot of things. War, climate change, and saxophones are all directly attributable to humans. Most saxophone players are human as well, which explains them to a certain extent. At least they're not guitarists.

There's so much bad humaning to complain about that I started a blog which I called Words for Humans, since I mostly write things for computers who neither applaud nor heckle. Mostly, they complain about syntax errors and often "can't parse", or sometimes "core dump" at my reasonable demands. How rude! My blog is written for humans, which is ironic, since I hate them so. Also, I happend to be human.¹ That's why my blog is terrible and I don't update it. It's also why most blogs are terrible and not updated.

I hate the word "blog". I'm just putting it out there. Can we come up with a better name for a personal website, like "personal website", or geocitypage?

There's no picture of me here. I think there are enough pictures of me. People who need to know what I look probably know already. The rest, like the government, can kill a tree, print, and mail me a form letter that makes unreasonable demands which I will probably ignore.

Electric Bass

I play bass. It's not a fish, it's a musical instrument. Some people call it a "bass guitar". It is not a guitar nor, and I can't stress this enough, a fish. People have difficulty groking this.

Computer Programming

To learn more HTML/CSS, pay me fuck-tons of money!

No, seriously, I'm a professional computer programmer. I mean it, just like I meant to make this this page to look like we're living 1996. Only a computer programmer would be so deranged as to actually specify Times New Roman as the page's default font. Am I the type of person who ordinarilly defaults to Times New Roman? Hell no! It's intentional. You have no other option. Check the stylesheet if you don't believe me.