Considering Foster Care

Considering Foster Care: A Four-Part Study Exploring Your Call to Care for Children and Families

Copyright 2019 | All Rights Reserved

A ministry resource provided by Faithbridge Foster Care Written by Jason Johnson

Devotional / Study

WHO IS THIS STUDY FOR?

This short study is for those exploring their role in caring for vulnerable children and supporting families involved in foster care. It’s meant to be a primer – not necessarily answering every question – but certainly helping to bring clarity on some of the most important ones, like “Why would we do this?” and “What’s the best way we can get involved?”

It’s critical for prospective foster parents or support families to access a well of encouragement from which they can make sense of their questions, fears, hopes and excitements. It’s also essential that they have a safe environment in which to process the raw and sometimes confusing emotions they have in a healthy way. This study is designed to help cultivate that for you.

How to use this Study

NO LEADER NECESSARY

Our hope is that this study is as accessible and user friendly as possible so that any anybody could pick it up and use it, whether there is a designated “leader” or not. It can be used as a personal devotional and/or small group discussion guide. It’s designed to be short, quick, and easy to work through, with no outside work needing to be done. The goal of this study is to help you frame God’s truths and the gospel around the unique experiences and emotions you’ll encounter as you potentially move towards foster care, so that you can find the comfort, perspective, and refreshment you need.

SESSION OUTLINES

Each session is organized around three primary sections: Bible passages, commentary to read and questions to reflect on. The goal is for this short study to serve you best, so do not feel confined by the content written for you. If other bible verses come to mind we encourage you to explore them, if you discover new ideas and perspectives as you read and reflect, be sure to write them down and remember them, and if other questions are more helpful for you to respond to then do the necessary work to ask and answer them so that you can get the absolute most out of this study as possible.

A DISCUSSION STARTER

The goal of each section is to promote discussion. This resource isn’t written as an in-depth study but is designed to promote in-depth thought and conversation. Each chapter covers a unique perspective on a particular aspect of fostering that may challenge you to think about the topic differently from the way you have before. The goal isn’t for you to agree with everything presented in this book. Rather, it’s for everything presented in this book to act as a catalyst for healthy and encouraging personal reflection or group discussion.

Guidelines

(for a group)

Your group, whatever its format, needs to be a safe place to learn, share, and be vulnerable with one another. Many of the topics discussed will draw out deep emotional responses and raw feelings—all of which require a healthy environment in order to be processed. In that light, here are a few suggested ground rules designed to help make your group experience positive and encouraging for everyone:

• Commit to confidentiality. What’s shared in this group stays in this group.

• Refrain from offering unsolicited advice. Assume the role of encourager; coach only when requested.

• Use “I” statements rather than “you” or “we” statements. The objective is for all participants to be personally vulnerable and encouraged, not to make generalizations.

• Leave room for everyone to speak. Allow all to participate . . . but no one to dominate.

• Avoid trying to give the “right” answers; focus more on giving “honest” answers. Transparency will make your time richer and more effective.

Session 1: What’s Your Why?

Of all the evidences that this world is not as it should be, none seem to be more paramount to the heart of God than when injustices rule, oppression runs rampant and children are left to fend for themselves without the loving and nurturing support of a healthy family. This is at the core of our “why.” Let’s explore in more depth...

READ: 1 John 3:16,18 —

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters... let us not love with words or speech, but with actions and in truth.

The work of Jesus on our behalf compels us to work on behalf of others. Why would we step into the hard? Why would we lean into the broken? Why would we open our families to the traumatic and difficult? Because that’s what Jesus has done for us. We lay our lives down for others because He first sacrificially laid down His life for us.

This beautiful picture of the gospel, and its vivid implications in our care of the orphaned and vulnerable, plays itself out through two primary aspects of theology:

1) Our Adoption;

2) His Incarnation.

He saw our brokenness and embraced us in our weakness, adopted us into His family and changed the course of our lives forever.

1) The Doctrine of Our Adoption

READ: John 1:12-13 —

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

The hinge upon which this entire new relationship with God has been formed is beautifully illustrated in scripture through the continuous use of the word “adoption.”

Passages such as: Ephesians 1:5 —

He predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ.

Romans 8:15 —

You did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

We were once outside the family of God but now, through the work of Christ on our behalf, have been adopted as dearly loved sons and daughters. The theology of our adoption helps form the basis of our “why.” Why would we care for orphaned and vulnerable children by bringing them into our families? Because that’s what Christ has done for us. But it doesn’t end there...

2) The Doctrine of His Incarnation

The word “incarnation” literally means to assume human form. The doctrine of Christ’s incarnation speaks to God stepping into humanity, wrapping Himself in flesh and living completely and fully as both God and man. It’s most notably recognized at Christmas with the birth of Jesus, yet its implications are far more pervasive than just on December 25th of every year.

READ: Matthew 1:22-23 —

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call Him Immanuel” (which means “God with us”).

The incarnation tells us that God sees hard places and broken people and moves towards them, not away. He is “with us”. He wrapped Himself up in our brokenness, carried our brokenness to the Cross, and was broken by our brokenness so that we don’t have to be broken anymore. God saw us in our plight and moved towards us, not away. That’s the gospel.

The theology of Christ’s incarnation helps form the basis of our “why.” Why would we immerse — or incarnate — ourselves into hard and broken places? Because that’s what Christ has done for us.

The implications of the doctrine of incarnation are broad. The opportunities for each unique individual to “incarnate” themselves into hard and broken places are endless and full of creativity. This moves the conversation beyond just foster care, adoption or orphan care in some capacity — and speaks to a renewed posture and perspective towards the world around us in all matters of justice, mercy and sacrifice.

• What other implications do you think this renewed posture has in our lives?

• What applications can you see it applying to besides the obvious foster care, adoption, orphan care and family support?

This leads us to one of the most commonly referenced bible verses when it comes to caring for orphans, engaging in foster care and adopting children into our families. Let’s explore...

READ: James 1:27 —

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.

This verse is used very often. Let’s break it down a bit:

• The word “religion” in this context literally means “an outward display of something that’s inwardly true.” That’s what we’re talking about - an outward display of the gospel that’s inwardly true in us.

• The word “visit” means to “move towards, step towards, get involved with.” Not avoid or isolate, but engage.

• The reference to “orphans and widows” is representative of the most vulnerable people groups in James’ context.

So, let’s consider that James 1:27 might not be as “prescriptive” as it is “descriptive.” James isn’t isolating his concern - and ultimately God’s concern - to just orphans and widows. He’s not necessarily giving us a prescription (orphans and widows only), but is rather describing what one of the purest and most undefiled demonstrations of the gospel looks like - by using orphans and widows as representatives of the most egregiously vulnerable groups of people in his cultural context.

Today this could also include the homeless, poor, victims of trafficking, etc. James wouldn’t say to us “No, God doesn’t care about them.” Instead he would say, “Yes! That’s who this verse is about too!”

In other words, James is saying that one of the purest and

Questions to Consider:

• Why does James suggest that getting involved with the hard and broken so uniquely puts the gospel on display?

• How is the message of moving towards hard and broken places contrary to the cultural narrative we are surrounded by? What does the world say we should do when with hard and broken things? (Hint: Think of words like avoid, isolate, insulate, etc.)

• What keeps us from moving toward hard places and broken people?

Galatians 4:4-5 —

In this passage the Apostle Paul reiterates the incarnation of Christ and beautifully ties it into God’s redemptive pursuit of humanity to make us His children. He says Jesus was “born of a woman” (incarnation) in order “that we might receive adoption” (adoption) into His family. The beautiful coming together of adoption and incarnation produces some incredible things in our lives, which we will explore in the next session!

THREE THINGS THE GOSPEL DOES:

It Compels Us In to It

The work of Jesus on our behalf becomes the primary motivation as to why we would work on theirs – He moved towards us, so we too move towards them.

It Sustains Us in the Midst of It

When the work of orphan care gets especially difficult, and we’re left asking “Why are we doing this?” the gospel reminds us that the work is worth it — it gives meaning to the struggle and context to the difficulty.

It is Put On Display Through It

Caring for the orphaned and vulnerable is one of the purest and most undefiled demonstrations of the gospel the world will ever see.

The echoes of the gospel in orphan care are beautiful and vivid. We cannot neglect the gospel as the source and sustenance of our “why.” It is the beginning of our motivation, the sustaining power in the middle and the beauty put on display in the end. It is our most compelling “why.”

Reflection Questions:

Whatideasortruthsstoodouttoyouthemostinthissection?

• What implications does this understanding of the gospel have on you as you consider the call to step towards some hard and difficult places?

• So often our focus and energy is spent on the “hows” and “whats” of things – What do we need to do and how are we going to do it? Why is it important to know and embrace your “why?” How will this help you take your next best steps forward?

“Why would we immerse ourselves into hard and broken places? Because that’s what Christ has done for us.”

•

Their “ Why”

Here is one family’s story of how why they got involved in foster care, in light of the heart of God and the Gospel

When we started considering foster care, we kept coming back the idea of “to whom much is given, much will be required” and that we are held responsible for what we have. We’re not rich, and we don’t have parenting experience, but we said “yes” to fostering because we have the resources, and trusted God to fill in the gaps. As one of my favorite worship songs says, “You’re bigger than I thought you were!” and God reminded me of that throughout our fostering journey.

Jess and Aaron Freeman

JESS AND AARON FREEMAN, GWINNETT CHURCH

Session 2: What’s Your Hope?

Caring for the vulnerable demands we lay down our lives for others just as Jesus laid down His life for us.

READ: 2 Corinthians 5:21 —

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

2 Corinthians 8:9—

For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so thatyoubyhispovertymightbecome rich.

• What stands out to you most about these verses?

• In what ways do these verses speak specifically into your process of considering foster care?

The gospel is the story of a “great exchange” – God’s righteousness for our unrighteousness, His holiness for our sin, the fullness of His glory for our emptiness. He suffered and died so that we could live.

Jesus laid down the infinite value of His own life so that we might know the immeasurable worth of being fully loved by Him. In a similar way, our call to care for the marginalized and orphaned is ultimately the call to accept the costs we may incur as worth it for the gain a child may receive through our love for them. This is nothing less than what Jesus has done for us, so we are compelled to do it for them. We must always keep this perspective, because when it gets hard and we begin to question whether or not the cost is worth it, it is being reminded of the gospel and the lengths Jesus went to call us His own that will carry us and sustain us through.

This journey will at times stretch the limits of who we are and what we are capable of. It will take us places emotionally, spiritually and even physically we never imagined. It will cost us, but in the end the value of the life of a child far exceeds the value of anything lesser we may have to lose in order to love that child.

Here’s a short list of “costs” you can anticipate incurring in the call to care to foster, adopt or support families. Consider some of these and see if you can think of any others:

Money

Comfort

The picture of the “ideal family”

Your schedule

Your car or house may be too small with an extra kid

Gospel-Centered vs. Family-Centered Thinking

Our care of vulnerable children must be gospel-centered in scope, otherwise the tendency to be family-centered will dominate our motivations. To be gospel-centered means always to keep at the forefront of our thinking the belief that it is better to give than to receive, and that true service of others almost always involves true sacrifice of self. This is the model of Jesus we read about above in the “great exchange,” and ultimately becomes the grid through which we consider, approach and engage in our care of the vulnerable through foster care.

Family-Centered Familygrowthmechanism

Beginswithourfamily’swants

What a child can offer us

Gospel-Centered Familygivingmechanism

Beginswithachild’sneeds

What we can offer a child

• If you were to take an honest evaluation of your heart today, where would you fall on this spectrum?

• What steps can you take to increasingly move yourself towards a giving, gospel-centered posture?

Foster care is first a family-giving mechanism before it is a familygrowth mechanism. It’s not about getting a child for our family but rather giving our family for a child — and willingly embracing the implications that come along with that. That’s not to say that a family can’t grow through foster care — it obviously does — or that a family doesn’t receive endless amounts of blessings and joy through the journey — it no doubt can. It is to say, however, that our first call is to give, not receive — to recognize that true service of others almost always involves true sacrifice of self. Only the gospel can produce that posture.

• What truth or idea stood out to you most in this session? Why?

• Why is it so important for us to understand the theology of the gospel as it pertains to our care of orphans?

• What concerns or fears do you have about the “costs” associated in getting involved in foster care? What specifically, if anything, comes to your mind immediately when we talk about the things you must be willing to “lose” in order for a child to gain?

RE-DEFINING SUCCESS

READ: Hebrews 11:29-38 —

29 By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as on dry land; but when the Egyptians tried to do so, they were drowned.

30 By faith the walls of Jericho fell, after the army had marched around them for seven days...32 And what more shall I say? I do nothavetimetotellaboutGideon,Barak,SamsonandJephthah, about David and Samuel and the prophets, 33 who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised;whoshutthemouthsoflions,34quenchedthefuryof theflames,andescapedtheedgeofthesword;whoseweakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies.

35...Therewereotherswhoweretortured,refusingtobereleased so that they might gain an even better resurrection. 36 Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment.

37 They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated — 38 the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.

• What outcomes of faith are noted in verses 29-34?

• What out comes of faith are noted in verses 35-38

READ: Hebrews 11:39 —

39 These were all commended for their faith...

• What does this verse say about the difference between those who saw victorious outcomes of faith and those who experienced more difficult and tragic ones?

• What truth can we draw from this passage about God’s primary concern? Is it on the outcomes we can produce or on our willingness to be faithful?

In Hebrews 11 we see how faith can produce significantly different outcomes. Some experienced great victories while others walked through horrific tragedies. In it all, God was pleased by their faithfulness and less concerned about the outcomes their faith produced.

Perhaps it could be said this way: God is more pleased by our willingness to be faithful along the journey of foster care than He is concerned about our ability to achieve a certain outcome through it. “Well done, good and *successful* servant?” No. “Well done, good and FAITHFUL servant.” Faithfulness is our success, not achieving certain outcomes that only God has the capacity to produce. Of course we want to see measures of health and stability and progress and hope achieved in the lives of kids from hard places, but what happens if our definition of “success” never materializes in their lives? Does that mean we have failed? Does that mean our work was in vain? Was the journey along the way really worth it in the end?

In the end, success in foster care and adoption is not dependent upon your capacity to produce a certain set of ideal outcomes, but rather is defined by your willingness to say yes, and to trust Him with the rest.

Your “yes” is your success; everything that follows is the mercy of God.

Reflection Questions:

• What specific thing is God asking you to be faithful with right now?

•

Inwhatwaysareyouconcernedwiththeoutcomesthatmight unfold if you were to walk forward in obedience?

• How does the truth of Hebrews 11 (and all of scripture, really) help you to reframe your fears of failure and your definition of what “success” ultimately is in God’s eyes?

“God is more pleased by our willingness to be faithful along the journey of foster care than He is concerned about our ability to achieve a certain outcome.”

Their “ Hope”

We had this picture in our heads like those security system commercials: The family all sitting around the television happy and smiling, everyone getting along, and everyone happy to be there. Bedtime stories and butterfly kisses… A fairy tale.

Our expectations have changed and its not a bad thing. Just like God meets you where you are, these children need to be met right where they are. Now, we expect that we will need to love someone with not so lovable behaviors at times. Bath time and bedtimes can be triggers and not a peaceful event that happens on a timely manner, and that’s ok. We expect the unexpected and take comfort in knowing that God is never hit with the the unexpected!

Becci and Chris Morgan

PARENTS

CHURCH

Here is one family’s story of what their expectations before fostering and how they have changed.

Session 3: What’s Your Fear?

We all have an “inner voice” that sometimes whispers to us and sometimes screams at us.

When we sense God leading us in a certain direction, it’s preaching a message of fear and doubt. It’s asking, “Who are you to think you can make a difference?” or “What if you don’t have what it takes?” or “What if you fail and look foolish to others?” or “Are you sure you’ve heard correctly from God on this?” Your voice could be asking you a million other things right now. That’s the thing about these voices; they’re as distinct and unique as each individual person. Like a fingerprint on your conscience – whispering, sometimes screaming.

What’s yours saying to you?

If you’re like most people at this stage, you’ve got a mash-up of excitement and fear, eagerness and doubt, hope and worry and a whole host of questions playing on loop in your head. Yet somehow, it’s the fear and doubt and worry that often seem the loudest – and the most paralyzing. They’re also incredibly sneaky – disguising themselves at times as valid, logical reasons why it might not be the right time, why we might not be cut out for this, or why we don’t in fact have what it takes to do this. Fear and doubt and worry want to convince you that no matter what, you shouldn’t do this.

So how do we confront this? What’s our strategy? To truly quiet the voices (notice we did not say silence…because they ever fully go away) we must correctly identify the root of our concern before we can adequately address the fruit of it. Let explore this further…

For example, “I’m afraid of getting too attached” is the fruit; “I fear I don’t have what it takes to grieve like that” is the root. Or, “I’m afraid of the effect it might have on my bio kids” is the root; “I’m afraid I don’t have what it takes to parent through that” is the root. Or, “I’m afraid of my life being controlled by a child welfare system” is the fruit; “I fear I don’t have what it takes to give up control like that” is the root. Or, “I’m afraid of what this process might cost us” is the root; “I’m afraid I don’t have what it takes to sacrifice like that” is the root. Our inner voices sometimes whisper but mostly shout “NO! You don’t have what it takes.” Maybe yours is right now.

The good news is that God doesn’t invite us into this expecting that we will always have “what it takes,” but He does bring us into this promising that when we don’t, He still does. That’s our hope and assurance - that what’s completely out of our capacity and control is absolutely in His. He has the ability to take what little we bring to the table and multiply it exponentially for His purposes.

READ: Matthew 14:14-21 —

WhenJesuslandedandsawalargecrowd,hehadcompassion on them and healed their sick. As evening approached, the disciples came to him and said, “This is a remote place, and it’s already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.” 16 Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.” 17 “We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered. 18 “Bring them here to me,” he said. 19 And he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. 20 They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. 21 The number of those who ate was about five thousand men, besides women and children.

• What does this familiar story tell you about what Jesus can do with what little we have to offer?

• How does this truth confront the “inner voice” that might be trying to convince you that you don’t have what it takes, so you shouldn’t even be considering this?

If God can take what little we have to offer and do great things with it, then perhaps we don’t need to let the fear of not having “what it takes” deter is from what’s next, but instead can let the confidence of Him having what it does drive us. Adoption

7 …in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

• How does Paul change the way he relates to and deals with his weakness?

• How is he able to do that?

• What implications does that have on our how relate to and use our own weaknesses?

In light of God’s ability to do great things with what little we have to offer, our weakness is no longer an excuse not to do something, but is now the platform upon which the power of God can be made most visible. That’s why Paul is able to say he “boasts” in his weaknesses – because he knows that it’s through them that Christ will be seen the most! Our weakness – and our not having “what it takes” - is no longer a place of “no,” but now, in the gospel, becomes the place we can declare with confidence, “I’m not sure how I’m going to handle all of this, but...yes!”

So how do you know if you’re “called,” “ready” or that “it’s time”? When you know just enough to be afraid of it but too much to let fear have the final say about it. This means we don’t wait for fear or worry to subside before we act; we simply choose to fight forward so that fear loses and kids and families win.

What if we started to assume the answer was “yes” until we heard a “no”, rather than “no” until we heard a “yes”? A lot would change. After all, obedience is less about what we think we can and cannot do, and our natural inclination to avoid hard and inconvenient things, and more about what we know God wants us to do – even if it’s hard and inconvenient.

You can do hard and inconvenient things. You can do scary things. You really can. But you can do those things in small, simple and strategic ways.

Reflection Questions:

•

What are you most afraid of? Is there a deeper “root” fear that needs to be addressed underneath that?

• What perspective or truth helps you confront that “root” fear and move forward in faith?

• What is your small, simple and best next step to take?

“ Our weaknessand our not having ‘what it takes’- is no longer a place of ‘no,’ but now, in the gospel, becomes the place we can declare with confidence, ‘I’m not sure how I’m going to handle all of this, but…yes! ‘”

Their “ Fear”

During our licensing journey, we encountered numerous fears. Capacity for more children, impact on our bio children and our marriage, ability to parent through challenges we might encounter, interactions with birth families, opening our home to agency/DFCS visits and regulations, etc. These fears might have stopped us, but God was so clear in convicting both my husband and me in our call to this that we were able to spur one another on. We experienced different fears at different times, so the other would be strengthened in faith when one was doubting. It was a beautiful time of growth in our marriage. We continued to remember that He will equip us in every way needed. He has proven faithful and we have seen our family and faith grow in ways we never would have experienced had we allowed our doubts and fears to overcome our call to become a foster family.

Heather and Tyler Price

FOSTER PARENTS, FOUR POINTS CHURCH

Here is one family’s story of how they over came their fears and doubts of becoming foster parents.

Session 4: What’s Your Something?

One Body, Many Parts

The imagery of a human body is consistently used throughout Scripture to illustrate the identity and activity of the Church – how the people of God relate with each other and work together.

Ultimately, unique gifts are given to unique individuals, not for their own good but for the good of the whole body. Within the Body of Christ roles are established not on the basis of rank, as if one person’s position was more important than another, but on the premise that when each member fulfills their responsibility the whole body will function better for it.

READ: 1 Corinthians 12:4-7 —

Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.

• What stands out to you most in this passage?

• What do we learn about uniqueness, diversity and unity in the Body of Christ? Based on these verses, how would you define “unity?”

But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be?...Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.

• How are we to understand the role we have been given in the Body? Has God made any mistakes in giving some people certain gifts and callings and other people different ones?

• What does this passage communicate about the essential nature of our diverse roles?

• Notice the tone of this passage. Does it seem to suggest your role in the Body is optional?

The proper functioning of the people of God to fulfill the purposes of God are always portrayed in communal terms, not individualistic ones. Everyone has a role to play, but not everyone is called to play the same role. The call to care for the vulnerable is for all – we all have a role to play, there are no exceptions.

The question is not “Am I supposed to get involved?” but rather, “HOW am I supposed to get involved?”

Opportunities to Get Involved

While the call is to all, the opportunities to respond are limitless and full of possibilities. No one can do everything, but everyone can do something. You may not be called to bring a child into your home, but you can certainly play a role in serving and supporting those who do. Or perhaps you will bring children into your home on short-term arrangements while others will foster and/or adopt more long-term. Again, no one can do everything, but everyone can do something.

Here are some common, practical ways to care for vulnerable children and their families or to simply provide care and support for those who are.

Foster Care

Foster care is a temporary living arrangement for abused, neglected, and dependent children who need a safe place (homes or treatment centers) to live when their parents or another relative cannot take care of them. Foster families are recruited, trained, and licensed to care for abused and neglected children temporarily, while their parents work with social work professionals to resolve their family issues. In cases where the child becomes free for adoption, foster parents may be considered as adoptive parents.

Adoption

Adoption is a legal process that permanently gives parental rights to adoptive parents. Adoption means taking a child into your home as a permanent family member. There are opportunities to adopt through the foster care system, private domestic agencies and international agencies. Adoption finalizes a child’s permanent placement into his/ her new family.

Respite Care

Respite care is basically short-term foster care. It is primarily used to provide aid to other foster families needing childcare for more than 24 hours and less than 14 days. This is extremely helpful as situations often come up in which the family must travel and can’t take the child due to state rules. Respite care gives foster, adoptive, and kinship parents and children the chance to have short, regular periods of time apart in which they can rest and recharge. It also provides crisis care for the times in which the trauma of the child is seriously impacting other members of the family. In Georgia, one must be licensed to provide respite care.

Babysitting

In the world of foster care, getting a babysitter isn’t the easiest thing. In fact, it’s somewhat of a process. You can support foster families by becoming a certified babysitter. This allows you to provide child care for foster families so parents can have an occasional time to “get away.” This is an invaluable gift to a foster family and is always much appreciated. Generally, a background check and CPR/First Aid certification are required, although many states aren’t even requiring that anymore.

General Resourcing

Many foster care and adoption placements happen with little to no advance notice. This usually means that needs can come up quickly. Donations of gift cards, diapers, and new supplies such as strollers, mattresses, car seats, and other necessities are invaluable for those who are bringing children into their homes.

The following chart help you to see it visually. Imagine a family bringing children into their home, and a community of other people wrapping around them providing tangible, relational and spiritual support. (Note: These ideas are not exhaustive, just examples.)

Think “Outside the Box”

Get creative! Mow foster families’ yards for them. Host a parents’ night out for foster and adoptive couples at church. Organize back-to-school drives to collect supplies for local foster children. Throw a big Christmas party for foster families and children. Use your business or hobby as a conduit to bless children and families. The opportunities to serve, support and show appreciation are endless. Get creative!

Whatareotherideasthatmightbewaystotangiblyand relationally support families who are caring for kids?

Identifying Your “Something”

Part of discovery what God is calling you to is identifying with clarity and confidence what He’s not leading you to. But how do you do that? Consider these three practical steps.

1. Pray.

Ask God to open your heart to His, and to protect you from the tendency to rationalize and justify so that you can just obey. Be willing to say “yes” to the uncertainties and unknowns.

2. Share with your community.

Our unique roles in the Body of Christ are given for the “common good” - the benefit of the whole body. Who better to filter our thoughts and feelings through than other members of the body? Community is a crucial filter for us in determining where and how God is leading. They can see blindspots we can’t but they can also see brightspots we’re unable or unwilling to see.

3. Research.

Educate yourself on the various ways there are to come alongside vulnerable kids and support the families who do. Read books and blogs, attend conferences, talk to other families. You’ll naturally find some opportunities are clearly not for you while others stir up a passion.

Reflection Questions:

• What do you believe the “something” is that God is asking you to do?

• Why do you believe that is your “something” right now?

• What best next steps can you take to begin to act on that?

“ No one can do everything, but everyone can do something. What is your something? “

Their “Something”

My husband and I were entering our Sunday School class before church one Sunday, and a family with five young children were walking down the hall toward us. I had never seen so much activity! Because most of the children were a different race from the adults, we knew they were either adopted or fostered. We watched them pass, continue down the hall, and go around the corner. We asked other church members about the family. Through our inquiries, we discovered they were foster children who were brothers and sisters. Rather than split them up, the foster parents accepted them all.

Watching that sweet family get all those active children to the appropriate Sunday School class that morning planted a seed in our hearts to help foster families in some way. Our adult Sunday School class later joined us in this mission. My husband and I, along with class members, volunteer with a foster family support organization in our church named CalledtoCare.

Carmen Abernathy

Here is one family’s story of how they discovered their something

VOLUNTEER WITH CALLED TO CARE AT MT. BETHEL CHURCH