Emeril LeGoinegasque

Good evening TSers it is good to be back in touch and I am also pleased to present photographs from our own journeys along the TS routes. Please continue reading.

The following photo is not the best however I do call it Salty Descent Into Madness. This household's curbside recycling consists mainly of bright orange Stouffer's microwave package meals. The recycling truck comes every two weeks on this route and there were approximately fourteen cardboard packages which does suggest this person eats only these terrible meals every single evening. Their heart and glands are laden with salt. I do not know what the yellow package was or why they needed a computer.



Here is a household driven crazy by peach flavor Snapple. It is the only liquid they drink. I think only a man would drink beverages of this type in this quantity and perhaps while performing a focused task such as computer work or woodworking.


On a separate day and on a separate street we see four bins full of Diet Peach Snapple. Clearly they are on a "kick" about hydration and flavor without calories. It is unlikely they drink water. This household has a person who is trying to change something very basic about themselves. Roast Beef suggested a diabetic weaning him or herself from sugar sodas and it did make much sense at the time.



E L-G.

I did find many swells of emotion as I monitored the new messageboard throughout the day. My first thoughts were indeed of panic as I read post after post of people not talking about TS and I felt they had fun at my expense. After some looking around I did notice commands which clean out the useless posts so now it is pretty on-topic there. Some good questions have arisen and I am proud of this thing in a way I do not yet understand. Thanks be to all who did post and stay on-subject as you do help this sport to grow.

So far Spongebath, Beef and I are chief moderators and we have a handful of "new bees" as I jokingly think of them. Today Beef tried to get at my goat but that is his way and he is a joker always in new places that is how he makes himself express his anguish at the unknown. His sasseyness will die down I expect. He will stop saying that I should be put into prison.

A good first day every-one. Thank you for helping in my dream of spreading TS.

Stay on topic,

E L-G

TSers we finally have a live discussion forum. Please be good and post only carefully there at first, and be wise, and do not be giddy. Issue forth only statements with the best interests of the sport in mind at first so we might see in a calmness how to grow forth. All too many times on Internet a great swell of poo-poo type messages does overwhelm the board keeper.

E L-G

Hello TSers, hope you all have a productive weekend of Trashspotting if you are able. Just a couple of official announcements do pertain - we have added Portland, OR and a travelling Trashspotter, please do visit their sites.

Also, a club will host our official discussion forum and we are very excited about this. I believe we will open the gates on Sunday so please do think of things to say on it, and remember your manners it never hurts to remind.

E L-G

Trashspotting - An Overview and Annotated Guide
Compiled by
Emeril LeGoinegasque
Robert L. “Spongebath” Dane
R. Beef Kazenzakis



“WE ARE ARCHAEOLOGISTS OF THE PRESENT”



TRASHSPOTTING, PRACTICAL DEFINITION:
To analyze the curbside recycling and general refuse of a household, neighborhood, city, or country, especially with a long-term view, for intellectual gratification, for social pleasure, and for cultural perspective.

TRASHSPOTTING, EXPANSIVE DEFINITION
by E L-G
Like a doctor does make an assessment of his patient through symptoms and subtle cues — like Sherlock Holmes, who could know the whole man by the marks and creases on his discarded shirt or hat, so do Trashspotters read the parts of the environment that are, to most, invisible. We are archaeologists of the present.

But talk with a man and he will suit his conversation to his audience; read his refuse to know his private measure. To Trashspot is to cut to the quick and know the true rhythms and trends of your fellow beings. To Trashspot is noble, though its subject is refuse. To Trashspot is to seek truth and interest in life, to spend time among friends, and to exercise the body. To Trashspot is to live fully, and well, and long.

I. The Master Council
The Master Council and Overseeing Body, for purposes of information centralization, inter-club dispute settlement, and maintenance of the living canon of Trashspotting lore and legend, shall consist of the Achewood Club: E L-G, R.D., R. B. K. Contact person shall be Emeril LeGoinegasque, emeril@achewood.com.

II. The Clubs
For matters of practicality and low profile, clubs are a maximum of six persons, and a minimum of two. Solo-member clubs are welcome, but this is a social sport and typically benefits its members most from two or more minds. Groups of greater than six tend to lose focus extremely fast, but more deleterious is their high profile, so if a Club does find its membership to swell, sub-groups ought take the same routes but many minutes apart, and meet up afterward at a favorite breakfast restaurant or, given the hour, a bar or café where food is served. Such staggered trips often create lively discussion and good-natured competition.

II-1. Club Nomenclature
The captain, or absolute leader of a club, is the Boodge. The Boodge is typically the founder but can be named by the founder if the founder does not want executive responsibilities.

Second-in-command, who leads in the absence of the Boodge, is the Cardo. He/she is appointed by the Boodge.

Proven or regular members are unnumbered, and are referred to as Devils.

Unproven or new members are Clear Devils.

Floating Occupation: The Jimframe takes the photos and keeps the minutes and compiles this information on-line. This can be a person of any rank. If the Boodge is the Jimframe, he is the Boodge-Jimframe, and so on. It is possible to have a Clear Devil-Jimframe, but not advised. The Boodge appoints the Jimframe.

III. Municipalities and Overlapping Territory
Any clubs may share routes. This enhances the amount of ongoing analysis. If tensions arise, the club Boodges must both contact the Master Council in order to enact resolution. The Master Council’s verdict will serve as the final ruling.

IV. Official Paraphernalia
Club members are encouraged to wear official Trashspotting apparel on outings and to potlach. The official crest is this:


The crest consists of a border, a vessel with a crown/light icon, initials of the sport, and three wedges, or flags, which represent the founders of the sport in its modern form (LeGoinegasque, Dane, Kazenzakis). Official gear will be made available come May 2006.

Sturdy, athletic footwear is advised, for the sessions may last several hours. It may also be necessary for a club to scramble on foot at great speed, so running shoes are always good candidates.

Additionally, one who walks for long periods should enjoy good nourishment, and a traditional club snack is a benefit of the sport. The Master Council’s club enjoys hot smoked turkey legs full of protein which is ideal for the long outing. In the warm months we enjoy them cool. You may enjoy anything from the convenience of jerky to the luxury of fried chicken, so long as your members are nourished and your trash is placed in public receptacles and not those of your subjects.

V. Comportment
Trashspotting is non-invasive, and Trashspotters typically do not handle the materials they analyze. A Trashspotter would never leave a site any different than he found it; that is to say, he leaves no additional recycling of his own. This would corrupt the clues for other clubs.

VI. Protection
It is commonly known that some do not like their refuse inspected and analyzed, and will become sore to the point of violence if they see you looking into their curbside bins. It is the code of the Trashspotter never to raise his hand in an offensive display of anger, but only in defense from attack, and only to repel the attack, and not to retaliate or escalate the violence.

That said, should you find yourself in a dangerous situation with a home-owner, landlord, or tenant, it is advised that you run fast afield. Most instigators of property-originating violence will not venture far from their property. It is instinctual.

VI.i. Safety of Members
No member shall abandon another member who has fallen and is in danger or otherwise.

VII. Liability
Refuse and recycling are typically no longer considered legal property of the owner, but you may wish to confirm this within your jurisdiction. So long as you are not handling the materials, peering invasively over fences, or trespassing &c, you are generally within your rights to stand and ponder any curbside bin or bag.

VIII. Potlach
The Potlach, or “pot-luck,” is a gathering of a club or many clubs to share hot grilled foods and does not involve the activity of Trashspotting. It is purely social and typically there are chips and beer, a seven-layer Mexican-style bean dip, taquitos, cookies, and the vegetables and meats for the grill. Music should be played at a good volume but not so loud as to disturb any neighbors. All recyclables should be recycled in the host’s bins. There may be dessert, but it should be light. The responsibilities for bringing the various foods are delegated by the Boodge.

In Closure

Thus it is spoken. Bon Q'huiellaé Détritus.
E L-G, April 18, 2006
Achewood Master Council

Good news, TSers. I have been adding your clubs and in my spare moments I am in fact just now able to finish up the TS manifesto which we shall all share. I will publish the text of it here at the site later tonight but please remember as this is a new and living document it will be necessary to amend and update it as events and your insights do unfold. It will be an excellent guideline in general though and from it you may take the gist of this our sport which we do love. I am just wanting to run it by Spongebath one last time once he is off his work. His work often runs late on week-ends. I am anxious to have this thing to show you, it is hard work indeed to wait.

E L-G

Hello from E L-G, TSers. I got away from the blog for a few days because I am very busy getting jerseys and such made for you, plus writing up the Guidelines. It is All Good. I trust you will stay with TS all the while and your excitement of the sport will grow 110-percent each person.

In the now I would ask all active TS clubs to get even tighter into each documented bin and give more careful thought to each individual item. In some cases I see the club secretary want to amuse or get far-out in humorous thought; but really TS should be serious and generated to make insight, not laughs.

Before the guidelines come out, how about this format for clubs just coming into posting TS updates:

1. photo of recycling bin
2. careful analysis of contents, particularly of labels on canisters or cans or bottles. Are they from the high fancy stores, or the gas station? A big part of knowing how to TS is knowing from which markets your local disposables originate, and how the different originations interplay.

E L-G

Hello and we are steadily typing up the TS guidelines. Here then I provide you with just a fast note on our own group's studies of this morning. I do not like that management of the sport should take from my involvement but it is a sacrifice which I am happy to make for I know it is not for-ever.

We saw a very sad recycle bin outside of the house of a very old lady today. She is rarely to leave and never to open the drapes, even, and when she does range out she is heavily covered from the sun tip to toe. For a while I have been watching this address with special interest because perhaps of my own fear of my own life in those end-years. That is why I remember it so readily and clear.

In the bin were but five items, and those were three jars of infant food, a light bulb, and a banana peel. You cannot recycle a banana peel and even the light bulb is dubious though it is glass. Last time the bin contained one jar of baby food and a Get-Rite vitamin drink. I do not like to speak on guesses but the cold spare picture of this descent into failing digestion and even senility did shaken my own personal demons up a good deal. I did not enjoy the rest of the trip as much for it.

Okay then that is some of my day and now back to the typing-up. Spongebath is off his work and to correct for typos.

Well it is time to hit the hay for tomorrow morning we rise early. The turkey legs they are smoking on the balconette and all of the coffee ingredients they are spread along the counter. This does remind me, a traditional snack is a valued member of a TS team. For us it is my family specialty the smoked turkey leg but for you it may be a hot and tastey burrito or just such as fries. I find my mind to be most clear with protein, not starch, just a friendly note. Perhaps write me and I will share your team's traditional snack in this blog. I can not always think of things to say when the blog mood does strike me so that would be helpful. Imagine knowing what fellow TSers snack on while they Trashspot the streets and alleys of Dublin or Kookaburra, it is a wonderful notion to think on.

E L-G

PS: TS guidelines coming this week-end I believe.

Thank you to all who request a shirt, shiney jersey, insulated beverage mug or flask, Zippo, button, or other form of Trashspotting official paraphernalia. As of our official emergency council meeting, we are having some of these things made now and we ask a for short grace period while they arrive. A fortnight yes may pass while the items are produced but not longer I hope. We will show pictures of the designs here soon.

Remember to include our logo on your Trashspotting site. And for ease you may link to trashspotting.com, which does simply redirect to this place, and is better to remember.

Official guidelines for Trashspotting are under review by Spongebath and Roast Beef tonight after Spongebath is off his work. They may be typed up and released this week-end.

On a personal note I did only have time to TS one street this morning and it was a terrible experience. It happens in the sport yes, there must be some risk to be some value. But the enormous bloody womens' maxi pad I saw on North Greenwood did make me ill. The trash men on that route are quite sloppy indeed, that woman must be quite embarrassed that her physical issue was on the street for all to see.

It will not commonly be vile here, but it will always be honest.

Dear Trashspotters,

I have received via email many requests that I make Trashspotting apparel and other items which do aid in the pursuit of the sport. We are to convene a special emergency council meeting this evening once Spongebath is off his work, and discuss this idea. Contact me at emeril@achewood.com to express interest in either a shirt or soccer-type shiney jersey. Those are the ideas which I had so far.

Also, please do watch for our official documentation on Trashspotting goals, procedure, and organizational structure. I hie upon it yet now. Also included will be tips on how to get the most from the sport.

I have indeed updated our sport's logo. You will notice now there is no more a lid over the receptacle icon, there is now light emanating therewith, which I consider a fitting evolution of it. Sorry to those who had already invested their money in sport apparel, it can no longer qualify as official.

Those clubs who meet with approval may place this logo on their web-pages.

Bonjour. In the many online discussion fora and also in the real cafés the sport of Trashspotting (le miroir) is arisen and in such our council, hereby claiming primogeniture, does seek to establish precedent, and outline the rules of the activity such that any following body has guidance, and any deviating body knows from which its standard does deviate. —E.L.

Thus it is spoken. Bon Q'huiellaé Détritus.

Trashspotting
DEFINITION.

To analyze the curbside recycling and general refuse of a household, especially with a long-term view.

Originator's Council
- Achewood District 94526
Emeril LeGoinegasque
Robert L. "Spongebath" Dane
R. Beef Kazenzakis

Establishment of Local Councils
This web-log will serve as a repository and official index of all Trashspotting organizations, world-wide. E-mail emeril@achewood.com to solicit membership and an audit of your club's URL. You may conveniently establish your club's Internet presence using this same free service, "Blogger." See above.

Suggested Format of Club Web-logs
- Photographs of refuse and refuse bins, omitting any detail of owner identity
- Date
- Group's analysis and conclusions
- Coverage of group barbecues and potlach

Of course some will exceed our modest outline. This is to be desired, for the health and growth of the sport.

To come: sample report from our club.